It is common practice
among sports writers to share quotes from columns and blogs appearing in other
print and digital publications. As you know, Chad is particularly adept at
scouring the web for fully attributed quotes that are amusing and intended to illustrate
a point. As unlikely as it may seem, several dozen quotes from Chad Picasner at
Large have appeared in newspapers across the country and always with full
attribution. No longer.
An unnamed editor at the
Seattle Times, that scion of the fifth estate, championing free speech and a
free press, quashed a proposed quote from CPL because he objected to the
author’s byline, Vod Kanockers.
Apparently, “ He Who
Shall Not Be Named” carries meaning that, if uttered, will invoke the full
wrath and fury of a jealous and vengeful God, or, at least, the ire of a
small-minded editor playing Moral Police Chief. No doubt that Antonin Scalia is
dancing in the streets of Seattle celebrating censorship of that most vile,
evil and corrupting entity – a name.
Shakespeare asked,
“What’s in a name?” The answer comes from Two and a Half Men, season 4, episode
2, way back when the show was actually funny:
Who's Vod Kanockers [4.2]
Alan: [reads newspaper headline]: "Mudslide kills 600 religious pilgrims." And yet
both my ex-wives live on.
Rose: Boy, you look like hell.
Charlie: Well, that's strange, 'cause I feel like crap.
Charlie: Let me tell you something about feelings. Feelings are
like your mother's breasts. You know where they are, but they are best left unfelt.
Rose: It's an interesting analogy, but may I point out that a mother's
breasts are a source for nourishment and comfort?
Charlie: Yeah, well, my mother's breasts were a source of silicone and Russian
vodka.
Charlie: Yeah, well, I don't have to face anything I don't want to
face, and I don't have to feel anything I don't want to feel, and that includes
Mom's vodka knockers!
Jake: Who is this "Vod Kanockers" that you speak of?
Alan: Eat your dinner.
Jake: The name's Kanockers. Vod Kanockers.
Pretty scary stuff, eh?
However, this mindless act of censorship did pique my interest and a web search
turned up several Vod Kanockers. One I found particularly relevant is the
author of a definition appearing in the Urban Dictionary (http://www.urbandictionary.com/author.php?author=Vod+Kanockers)
1 definition by Vod
Kanockers
1. Drama-shit
The attitude of someone
who constantly starts drama because they are shit.
Exp. We are so pissed
with people and their drama-shit attitudes.
Good to know that
particular Vod has work in Seattle.
HWSNBN
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