Sunday, June 28, 2015

WHO? WHAT? WHERE? WHY? WHEN?

No, I'm not channeling Vinnie Barbarino and Mr Kotter doesn't have the answers. In fact neither do I. Maybe you all can help.

Who's at fault here?
Thursday night, Jon Lester of the Cubs was pitching against the Dodgers and he was having trouble with his location. In fact, he walked four guys in four innings, helped by a home plate umpire (Andy Fletcher) who had a narrow strike zone that night. As could be expected, Lester indicated his frustration and some words were exchanged, but Lester turned away. Not good enough for Fletcher who actually started out to the mound to continue the argument. The cubs catcher and manager quickly got between Fletcher and Lester and prevented what would have ended up as a Lester ejection. This is a clear case of an umpire instigating a big argument for no reason other than Fletcher's egotistical manner. He should be suspended for a week. 

What's with all the injuries?
It's been a bad week for players. There was an amazing number of injuries for a number of different reasons.
Giancarlo Stanton - Hit by a pitch, broken wrist
Robinson Cano - Hit by a warm-up ball thrown by the Dodgers between innings (I assume it was an accident since the Mariners are certainly no threat to Los Angeles.
Andrew McCutcheon - hit in the elbow by a pitch
Tim Lincecum - Hit in the pitching elbow by a line drive (See how things even out?)
Williams Perez - Hit in the foot by a line drive (Hitters - 2, Pitchers -1)

Where's Jeter?
It's not unusual for a recently retired player to pass on the first Old Timer's Game after his retirement from the Yankees, so it was no surprise that Derek wasn't around for this years event. But where has he been? I have read that he's been in the Dominican Republic, Europe, and India, basically everywhere but my hometown of Oswego, NY. Well enjoy yourself Derek. I hope you're at least sending postcards to Hannah Davis. Luckily for you, she currently appears to be dating a white horse.

Why do they talk so much?
We're talking about baseball announcers here. I started with the ESPN Sunday night guys, explaining everything from the reasons behind certain plays to the theory of relativity - and getting them both wrong. Now everybody is doing it. Apparently there have been a few seconds of quiet in the booth because the powers-that-be have added a third man in the booth. And they all drone on and on and on, to the point when even Annie-O is yelling, "WILL YOU ALL JUST SHUT UP?" at the TV. Paul O'Neil used to be a little shy and didn't say too much, now he's turned into the second coming of Phil Rizzuto, talking about everything BUT the game. Michael Kay is supposed to run the broadcast, but instead of controlling them, he goads them into more and more. I never thought I'd say this, but can we get Joe Morgan back? He was always so wrong it was comical but at least he didn't talk that much.

When is this going to stop?
Pete Rose has applied for reinstatement into the good graces of Major League Baseball. But new information has surfaced that claims Pete also bet on games when he was playing. He's denied this as lately as two weeks ago. No matter what comes to light, Pete and all the other cheaters of one kind or another in sports, refuse to admit any wrong-doing. They deny, deny, deny, until it's proven and then they say, "Well, maybe I did."  There's a famous line from the movie, "Three Days of the Condor,"  where the main character says to an FBI agent, "You guys think if you don't get caught in a lie, it's the same as telling the truth."

Put out an American flag and root for the Women's soccer team Tuesday night in the World Cup semi-finals.

***THEY SAID IT***
"A New York undercover investigation has resulted in finding pricing inaccuracies at all 8 Whole Foods stores in the NYC area. All errors were in favor of the retailer which is known to be well over priced as is. Yankees and Mets fans said they would never shop there again as they lined up for their $27 hot dog and beer."  -- TC Chong
"The Seattle Mariners re-assigned hitting coach Howard Johnson to the minor leagues. To ease the transition, that first night the minor league manager told Johnson the team hotel was named after him."  -- Brad Dickson
"But really? One of the “top stories” headlines on USAToday.com today is “Stanton injury a crushing blow for fantasy owners.” As opposed to a blow to the Marlins, Marlins fans, or baseball fans in general who just like to watch a great player?"  -- Janice Hough
" Tonya & Nancy: The Rock Opera” — based on the Harding-Kerrigan figure-skating knee whack in 1994 — makes its Big Apple debut at the New York Musical Theatre Festival in July. No need to say “Break a leg!” to these thespians."  --  Dwight Perry
"It’s a bad sign if you can’t distinguish between a sport and a group of people rushing to the bathroom. Doping for racewalking is like robbing a bank that you know has only $2 in it."  -- CBS's James Corden
"Ballot stuffing has resulted in 8 Kansas City starters voted onto the AL All Star team. As the winner of the event gets World Series home games advantage, wouldn’t it be wiser for KC fans to vote in the entire Phillies team instead?"  -- TC Chong
"According to a new report, Pete Rose bet on baseball while he was a player. Everyone in the world surprised by this report will be meeting Monday on top of the first base bag at the Cincinnati Reds’ stadium."  -- Brad Dickson
"A fan at Wrigley Field caught a foul ball while feeding his baby: “People were shocked — not that he was holding a baby, but because someone wearing a Cubs hat caught a ball."  -- Conan O'Brien
"At the Women’s World Cup, U.S. striker Abby Wambach is blaming artificial turf for her lack of scoring. “See?” said the Winnipeg Blue Bombers."  -- RJ Currie
" Too much of a good thing: Paul O’Neill has become a good, willing and folksy all-things raconteur. Great. Still, someone at YES should tell him the primary reason we tuned in is to watch a ball game."  -- Phil Mushnick
"A Chicago Cubs fan interfered with Dodgers’ first baseman Adrian Gonzalez and made a one-handed catch while feeding his 7-month-old son. Not surprising: Because it’s Chicago, the 7-month-old was devouring an 89-inch deep dish pizza."  -- Brad Dickson
"The Patriots Super Bowl rings are the largest ever, with each featuring 205 diamonds and 4.85 karats. The ring is so big, it won’t fit in Vladimir Putin’s pocket."  -- RJ Currie.

CP-

Saturday, June 20, 2015

3000 HITS .... I GUESS

A-Rod got his 3000th hit last night, at least that's what the record books say. As all the YES broadcasters like to say, "Each individual will have to make up their own minds as to whether or not it's legitimate."  I have no idea how you would go about determining how many hits were 'earned' and how many were drug-related. You may want to recognize Bond's homerun record, or McGwire's accomplishments, but remember, you still have to hit the ball regardless of how strong you may be. A-Rod is proving a couple of things this year: there is a lot of talent inside that body and he has a work ethic that is unmatched. That has to account for something.
** This part is vary sad, though. The clown that caught A-Rod's 3000th hit homer, wants to keep it, because, "...I'm a collector and this ball means a lot to me."  Basically, he's living his pathetic life on the coattails of the talents and accomplishments of others. I would have understood it more if he demanded some exorbitant sum from A-Rod or the Yankees. I still wouldn't have liked it, but greed is more understandable than meanness. 

## So Pablo Sandoval gets benched because he "liked" somebody on the internet; in the bathroom...during the game...when he wasn't playing. Now I couldn't care less about Boston's problems and I don't condone what Pablo did, but come on, did they really have to make such a big deal out of it and sit him for a game for this? Bone-headed plays, failure to hustle, these are things that deserves punishment.

## The Yankees scored more than six runs last night which means Papa John's offers 50% off any online order. If you happen to live in the Miami area, the Marlins only need five runs. Not showing a lot of respect for the Marlins. It could be worse: in Milwaukee, I hear Papa John's immediately brings a meat-lovers pizza out to third base for any Brewer that makes it that far.

## Ya' gotta love those New York papers. Their back page headlines can be very amusing. The last two I saw - GARDY GOES YARDY  and  C.C. = SO SO.

##  Okay, let's cut up the All-Star game again. No matter how bad things are, they can always get worse. They have taken an exhibition game and made it a critical part of the season. They play everybody and have had to increase the size of the roster because of that, and the rule that every team has to be  represented. If that isn't enough, the Kansas City fans have taken advantage of the loop hole in the voting by flooding the ballot box with votes for the Royals. Computers have made this even easier in spite of the limitations (twenty five votes per e-mail address). Computer geeks have figured out how to bypass that restriction which resulted in some 65 million votes being discarded because of "irregularities."  There is so much wrong with this whole thing that they should scrap it and start from scratch. Here are some suggestions I would like to see implemented:
1) Teams are picked by the managers from each league. The top two vote-getters for each position make the team. Managers each pick two pitchers and the top 10 pitchers make the team.
2) Each team does NOT have to be represented.
3) No rule that everybody must play.
4) No limitation on how long a player must stay in the game, except for pitchers.
5) The game is for exhibition purposes ONLY.
If you want to determine the home field advantage for the World Series other than alternating between leagues, use the overall record of inter-league play.

Now, isn't that better?

## No truth to the rumor that the Grand Marshall of the Golden State Warriors victory parade is Riley Curry. She will have her own float, however,

***THEY SAID IT***
"It pains me to say anything nice about a Dodger. But I do love this tweet from Brandon McCarthy. “in keeping with baseball tradition, a Houston exec should walk into the STL offices and hit their best front office guy with a fastball."  -- Janice Hough
" This is amazing. Six members of the Kansas City Royals are now leading the U.S. presidential race."  -- Brad Dickson
"Yankees slugger Alex Rodriguez hit career home run No. 666 Saturday night. Conspiracy theorists say the devil made him do it."  -- Dwight Perry
"Thursday’s Jays-Mets pitching duel had RA Dickey, age 40, against 42-year-old Bartolo Colon. Urine tests found no Clostebol or Danazol, but plenty of Geritol."  -- RJ Currie
"Andre Iguodala  of the Warriors captured seven of the 11 votes to become the first to take the NBA finals MVP award.  But what about Lebron who garnered the other four votes? He was unquestionably the best player with the best stats but the majority of the voters made it clear they were only willing to give the award to someone from the winning team."  -- Hartley Miller, "The Hart Attack"
"Really bad timing for the St. Louis Cardinals to get caught.. This year investigators will believe the Astros actually had information worth stealing."  -- Janice Hough
"Cleveland QB Johnny Manziel declared that the days of his cartoonish persona, boorish acts and signature money sign are over. Reaction was predictably mixed: Browns fans are ecstatic. Joke writers are inconsolable."  -- Dwight Perry
" The Warriors’ Andre Iguodala was voted MVP of the NBA Finals. Great news for everyone except whoever has to engrave that name on a trophy."  -- Jimmy Kimmel
"Fan balloting has resulted in 8 Kansas City Royals starters voted in for the All Star Game. First reactions were that there must have been some type of computer screw up. Otherwise it would have been 9."  -- TC Chong

CP-
 

Sunday, June 14, 2015

I DON'T GET IT

ESPN - All sports. all the time.
Except when it isn't. When you tune in, you may see sports highlites but you might also see other things. You may see rock stars pretending to be sports anchors. You might see current athletes pretending to be sports analysts. You may even see sports anchors, pretending to be comedians. The pretense is over, guys - you aren't. I don't mind seeing one of the hosts trying to do an off-beat, funny intro into a segment; what I don't like is two of them trying to amuse one another, basically forgetting why they're there: SPORTS.
They have a number of women hosting the show now, and while I was dubious at first, they have proven they know sports, sometimes having a better understanding of the games than some of the guys. The short skirts don't hurt either.
Today, they had a fellow who does art using only a box of table salt. Is this a future Olympic sport?

Abby sits, Sweden laughs
Sweden's coach, Pia Sundhage, who used to coach the American team, said if she still coached the Americans, she would put Abby Wambach on the bench. The USA coach, Jill Ellis, fell for the ploy and Abby did not start. She did play the 2nd half, but the USA team lost 20 minutes of her talent which might have been the difference in the game. Wambach has it all: size. speed, strength and ability. She also has a knack for being in the right place at the right time. Plus, she's a bull. She runs opponents into the ground. But the biggest factor is her mere presence. Opponents often have to have two or sometimes three players mark her because she's a goal scoring machine. This frees up her teammates. If there is one maxim true in all sports, it's this: You can't score while sitting on the bench. The final score was 0-0, but it was really Sweden -1, USA -DNP (coaches decision).

Where have you gone Larry Lucchino?
Lucchino. president of the Boston Red Sox, put together what he thought was a World Series contender and boasted enough about it that he conned most of the media into believing him. He did it by spending a few million on some hitters that were going to strike terror into every pitching staff in the AL East. "Buying" a contending team is what Lucchino claims the Yankees did every year. Now that he's doing it, it's um...okay. Pablo Sandoval is not playing a gold glove 3rd base and he's hitting sporadically. Hanley Ramirez began by hitting a lot of home runs and then just stopped and continues to play left field like Manny Ramirez with a pulled hamstring. The pitching staff did have a lot of question marks coming into the season. There is no question now - They're terrible. The Sox are in last place and finding new depths to sink into every day. Watch out, Larry, Owner John Henry is starting to come to the games - and he's not smiling.

When will the Yanks figure out which team they are.
For a week, the Yanks look like the class of the AL East. The next week, they'd have trouble beating the Fargo Redhawks of the American Association. They are second in the majors in homeruns, but they lead the league in errors. They have arguably the most potent bullpen in the league (when healthy) yet they lead the league in wild pitches. Girardi and Cashman are in full panic mode when it comes to the bullpen. Have one bad outing and BOOM, you're pitching for the Lincoln Saltdogs. We'll probably have to wait until October to find out who the 2015 Yankees are.

Who should be the starting pitchers for the All-Star game?
Why is this an ESPN segment? Who cares who the starters are/ They're only going to pitch one inning anyway. Besides, most managers don't want ANY of their pitchers in the game. Why not just let retired-commissioner Bud Selig draw a name out of a hat?
There is talk that Alex Rodriguez should be in the All-Star game. Why? His numbers don't justify it. Sure, they're terrific for a 40-year old man after two hip surgeries and sitting out a full year, but there are a few DH-types out there with much better numbers who merit the choice.

***THEY SAID IT***
"A sample daily schedule for LSU fans this week at the College World Series in Omaha: breakfast, horseshoes, beer, more horseshoes, more beer, barbecue, more barbecue. Followed by a baseball game.* (*Time permitting.)"  -- Brad Dickson
"After the Cavaliers’ one-man show helped win Game 2 of the NBA playoffs: "LeBron James said it was a huge win, and he couldn’t have done it without the ball."  -- Jimmy Fallon
"There is a push for American Pharoah to be named Sports Illustrated’s Sportsman of the Year. There’s also a much smaller push for American Pharoah to be featured in the next swimsuit issue."  -- Conan O'Brien
"The owner of American Pharoah had already sold the breeding rights before he won The Belmont last Saturday. That guy doesn’t horse around when it comes to selling shares for “horsing around”.  -- TC Chong
"South Korean soccer player Kang Soo-il is blaming a moustache-growing cream for flunking a steroid test. Of course, it’s mere coincidence he has to shave it five times a day."  -- Dwight Perry
" The College World Series started today. What a shame that the Philadelphia Phillies just missed qualifying."  -- Janice Hough
"The way the Boston Red Sox are playing these days, fans are starting to refer to the Bobby Valentine era as "the good old days."   -- Mike Lupica
"The NFL announced October’s Bills-Jaguars game in London will only be available on the Internet. Network TV shows in that time slot promptly doubled their advertising rates."  -- RJ Currie 
"Part of the deal to keep the Arizona Coyotes was a favorable lease arrangement with the city of Glendale Arizona to keep the team there. That deal calls for the city to pay the Coyotes $15M a year to play in the arena; I would call that a “favorable lease”; how about you?"  -- The Sports 
Curmudgeon 

CP-
 

Tuesday, June 09, 2015

THE DRAFT

Up until a few years ago, I was only vaguely aware that the draft existed. Even then, I wasn't aware of how much the Major League teams relied on them. There were occasional mentions that a team had drafted so-and-so back in '86 and now he's a big star. But then player salaries began to skyrocket out of sight, not only in dollars, but also in the length of the contracts. (The Mets will be paying Bobby Bonilla $1.2 million a year until 2035, when he's 72. He last played in 2001) When it became apparent that these players just weren't worth carrying for so long after they were productive at all and for such astronomical sums, that clubs looked for other sources of players. Thus, the draft.

Even then, with people talking about it more and more, It wasn't until this year, when MLB decided that the draft was an EVENT, (that's EVENT, not event) that it became a TV special. It started last night and will continue for three days, when we get down to the final rounds when teams will be drafting clubhouse attendants, because...what else is left?  ("He's great with a broom, Bob, and he has major league shoe-shining ability now. I predict he will be stocking drink machines in a major league clubhouse by 2016.") I hope that last line ends up being a joke.

Back to reality, the actual draft. The Yanks were known to be interested in a shortstop named Cornelius Randolph who was touted as a 5-tool player (run, hit, hit with power, field and throw), but he was picked at #10 by the Phillies. With pick #16, the Yanks picked a right-handed pitcher named James Kaprielian from UCLA. He's predicted to be a #4 or #5 starter. He does have a cool nickname, though - Grandmaster K. - because of his propensity for striking batters out.
You have to love the Yanks #30 pick though: SS Kyle Holder. He's supposed to be a terrific fielder - one scout rates him plus-plus with the glove - but it might not matter since he can't hit a lick. If wet paper bags stymie him, what's he going to do with a ML curve? Why do they need him?  Stephen Drew already has the wet paper bag situation handled.

Interesting Yankee-Nationals game tonight. Masahiro Tanaka versus Max Scherzer. Wonderful if you like 0-0 ballgames with a total of three hits.  If they get a pitcher's umpire, we may see the first double no-hitter in history. I won't. I'll be asleep.

Crazy item in the Rochester sports page today. The Triple-A Rochester Red Wings heard that WWE wrestler Bret Harte was coming to town as part of a promotion, so the bullpen crew decided to use his visit as a means to introduce a little bonding in the bullpen. They have all selected a pro wrestler to emulate. They dress like him and take on his ring persona. Randy Savage, the Undertaker, the Rock and the Ultimate Warrior, to name a few. A couple of them say they can't wait for the first bench-clearing brawl. They're ready.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Doesn’t Sepp Blatter, former FIFA President, sound like something that can be treated only with powerful antibiotics?"  -- Mike Lupica
"Last week an 80-foot-wide sinkhole opened up at a Missouri golf course. This week Tiger Woods three-putted it."  -- RJ Currie
"After reportedly being heckled by a fan at the AT&T Byron Nelson Open, Johnny Manziel threw a water bottle. The bottle was intercepted and returned 59 yards."  -- Brad Dickson
"After his team’s 18-4 loss to Arkansas in an NCAA baseball super regional: “If it was a good pitch, they hit it. If it was a bad pitch, they hit it even further."  -- Missouri St. pitcher Jon Harris
"On pace for 183 home runs but just a .212 batting average with runners in scoring position?
If the Mariners were a car, it’d be sitting up on blocks, a for-sale sign in the back window, with the lemon-law proviso that it packs some power but the clutch is shot."  -- Dwight Perry
"With the votes counted as of today, seven Kansas City Royals on track to start this year’s All-Star Game. Guessing most Americans couldn’t NAME seven Kansas City Royals."  -- Janice Hough
"After inadvertently washing my wallet with my clothes, I’ve applied to be president of FIFA. I’m experienced at laundering money."  -- RJ Currie 
"Cincinnati Reds first baseman Joey Votto drew a three-ball walk. Man, the commissioner is throwing out all stops to speed up the game."  -- Brad Dickson
"Indian police said they detained a pigeon suspected of being a Pakistani spy after it was found to have a message stamped on its body. They released it, however, upon learning that the message translated to 'Property of Bill Belichick.’"  -- Bill Littlejohn
"Things may change in Boston, just because it’s a long season there the way it is everywhere else, but at this point in time the Red Sox would be willing to send Pablo Sandoval back to the Giants for a bag of batting practice balls.        Just sayin’."  -- Mike Lupica
"I read a report that Raiders’ QB, Derek Carr missed some workouts because of numbness in his fingers. Given the pounding that he took last year behind an offensive line that was only offensive in the sense of its collective body odor, it ought to be a plus that he only had numbness in a couple of fingers."  -- The Sports Curmudgeon

CP-
 

Friday, June 05, 2015

DAVID CONE WILL BE IN HIS GLORY

Those of you who watch the Yankee games on the YES NETWORK, know that when David Cone is one of the analysts, we will be besieged with all kinds of statistics. Some are valid and some are interesting, but most of them rely on some sort of basic assumption or opinion out of which, these cyber-metrics are born. I thought we had reached the limit of how far these stats could go, but unfortunately that's not true. Brace yourself kiddies, this is a stunner.

We are going to talk about catchers, trying to determine which ones are the best defensively. Major League catchers can all  catch pitches, most can block pitches in the dirt and some are pretty good at throwing out potential base stealers. There are some other factors which should be mentioned:
1) Does he "call" a good game? Let's not forget that the pitcher has the final say on what gets thrown.
2) Is he good at "framing" pitches? This means can he fool those dummy umpires by pretending a pitch was over the plate. I'm sure umpires just love to be told that catchers can trick them like this.
3) Is he good at blocking pitches in the dirt? Typically with these Advanced Metrics, there are so many variables that you could end up blaming the ball boy down the left field line for letting runners advance. In addition, I am no longer sure what constitutes a wild pitch versus a passed ball. I have my opinion which is in agreement with...nobody else.  (But I'm still right!)
All these statics boil down to one basic cybermetric: WAR - Wins Against Replacement.

Baseball Prospectus can now tell us what catchers are the best defensively based on these simple stats:
gcWINSAA - game-calling wins above average
frWINSAA - framing wins above average
blWINSAA - blocking wins above average
and finally...
cWINSAA - catcher wins above average
The last item being a sum of the first three.

I have seen no proof that any of these are valid, probably because there is no proof. This is all just like beauty contests. Who can say which girl is the prettiest, it's all just someone's opinion.

So, Mr. Cone, if you want to get off on these, be my guest. I challenge you to debate these some day, privately or during a Yankee broadcast.

By the way, Yadier Molina has the best rating in the game today (big surprise).  Brian McCann is second. If that doesn't prove my point, I don't know what will.

## Gordon Edes, ESPN staff writer from Boston, describes the disappointing play of Hanley Ramirez and Pablo Sandoval in a recent column. He says Ramirez may be the worst left fielder in Boston History and when the comparison is to Manny Ramirez, you know you're at the bottom of the barrel. Hanley is not very popular in the clubhouse and usually leaves without talking to reporters about any miscues. He hit 10 home runs in the first month of the season and none since. Pablo is described as affable but is not hitting as well as expected, especially against lefties and has suddenly developed Chase Headley disease, the inability to field his position. These two, plus David Ortiz,  are the basic reasons that writers were picking the Red Sox to go all the way. The hole they're digging themselves is getting deeper.

***THEY SAID IT***
" The NCAA has charged UNC with five major violations connected to the school’s long-running academic fraud scandal. Now let’s see how they come up with “severe” punishments that don’t keep the men’s basketball team out of March Madness."  -- Janice Hough
" Sepp Blatter resigns from FIFA with generous severance bribe"  -- TheOnion.com
"The first 25,000 Orioles fans at June 27’s home game will receiver a Buck Showalter garden gnome.

So what’s the Birds’ next managerial giveaway, Earl Weaver gargoyles?"  -- Dwight Perry
"Dolphins kicker Caleb Sturgis injured himself playing kickball: “Isn’t that like Arthur Rubinstein injuring his hand while playing ‘Chopsticks’?"  -- Bill Littlejohn
"The Women’s Soccer World Cup starts it's month long run in Canada on Saturday, and souvenir sales figure to be brisk. Everything will be on sale, soccer balls, jerseys, national flags, FIFA officials ..."  -- Argus Hamilton
"Ben Ancheff, the 300 lb St. Thomas U (Miami) college pitcher was suspected of having pine tar & resin on his forearm. Umpires checked him and it turned out to be Hersheys chocolate syrup, butter and jam."  -- TC Chong
"Johnny Manziel threw a water bottle at a badgering fan at the Byron Nelson Classic. Word is the bottle was half loaded — or was that Manziel?"  -- RJ Currie
"A swanky Mexican resort opened an underwater bar: In related news, John Daly is taking scuba lessons."  -- Mike Bianchi
"The Golden State Warriors invited a 105-year-old fan to Game 1 of the NBA Finals at no charge. She was only 102 when the 2015 NBA playoffs began."  -- Brad Dickson

CP-


Tuesday, June 02, 2015

THINGS YOU WON'T BELIEVE

## "King" Felix Hernandez, arguably the best pitcher in baseball, was shelled last night by the NY Yankees, arguably the worst division leader in baseball, for 7 runs.

##  With dark clouds overhead and rain in the forecast, the Seattle mariners kept their dome OPEN before the game. It hardly ever rains in Seattle, does it?

##  Why hasn't the NBA finals started yet? Are they waiting for a decision from "King James" LeBron?

##  Why hasn't the NHL finals started yet? Are they trying to outlast the NBA?

##  The sports media is trying to find out if  Riley Curry will bring her dad, Stephen, to her next press conference.

##  We have watched many players being interviewed on the field after a game, get a Gatorade bath while talking. The interviewer, often a lady, will get a bath along with him. How long before this gets really, really embarrassing for these ladies, who are usually dressed very nicely?

##  Will this be the year that a division winner in baseball has a sub-.500 record?

##  Question: Would you rather pay $5 million for a .157 average hitter than $24 million for a .320 hitter?  The Yankees did.

##  I remember listening to Mel Allen or Red Barber doing baseball broadcasts all alone. Vin Scully STILL does them all alone for the Dodgers. The Yanks have at least two, often three plus Meredith wandering around the stands. On Sunday nights, ESPN has three in the booth and TWO in the stands. If they would put the game situation on the screen, we really wouldn't need any of them.
I'm trying to find out if it's true that ESPN will have one reporter in the parking lot next week.

##  Speaking of Meredith Marakovits, why is she wandering around the stadiums? Can she not find the booth or won't they give her a key?

##  Has anyone found Chase Headley's glove? He has 11 errors so far this season after averaging less than 9 per season in his first 8 years. Horace Clark averaged a tad over 11 in his 7 seasons as the Yanks 2nd baseman.

##  Have you ever seen a better fielding first baseman than Mark Teixeira? Maybe they should be checking  his glove for pine tar.

##  Robinson Cano isn't hitting like Robinson Cano so far. Can we blame it on his inability to take his leisurely strolls, circling the catcher and umpire, a couple of times during his at-bats?

##  Josh Hamilton is making the LA Angels look like their decision to dump him was a little hasty.

***THEY SAID IT***
"At a Four Seasons in Texas, Johnny Manziel got frustrated with a fan and threw a water bottle at him. Fortunately the situation didn’t escalate any further, as no doubt Manziel’s throw missed the guy by a foot."  -- Janice Hough
"Cincinnati Reds first baseman Joey Votto drew a three-ball walk. Finally, our low math scores are having an impact."  -- Brad Dickson
"Police were called to a Michigan McDonald’s after it turned away a man wearing scuba gear. I recall carrying jumper cables into a restaurant once; they warned me not to start anything"  -- RJ Currie
"What have you done to our pitcher?"  -- An e-mail to Chad Picasner from Dwight Perry, Seattle Times night Sports Editor
"Seahawks’ DE Michael Bennett says that playing for coach Pete Carroll “is like playing for Willy Wonka.” Well, except for at the end of the movie, Willy Wonka handed off the factory."  -- Bill Littlejohn
"Lawmakers have voted to repeal the death penalty in Nebraska.Though they will make an exception whenever a Cornhusker football coach loses three games in a season."  -- Dwight Perry

CP-