Saturday, October 09, 2021

IT'S OVER WITH FOR THE YANKEES

 A team with all the potential in the world can't get out of it's own way. They had a Yankee all-star team on the injured list at times this year, but that's no excuse. They have some talented players in the farm system that they were forced to use, but the trick with rookies is to try and keep them out of critical situations, especially pitchers. Boone didn't do that. To quote and old song, "They'll Be Some Changes Made."

Here are some changes I think will be made - and some that should be but won't: 

Aaron Boone - He should be gone but won't be. He has mishandled the pitching staff all year, mostly the bull pen. He can't wait to get the starting pitcher out of the game (Except for Garrit Cole), then continues to try and match pitchers to specific hitters - all by the book. BTW, they should fire the book, too.  Where is Buck Showalter when you need him?

Gleyber Torres -  never lived up to his potential.

Luke Voit - The Yanks obviously don't want him so they should trade him.

Anthony Rizzo - Re-sign him. I like this guy. He excellent in the field and is a team player.

Bret Gardner - He's older but he can still play..

Gary Sanchez -We've waited for 5 years for his "potential." Let someone else wait.

Corey Kluber - Like to have him but I think he'll cost too much.

Aaron Judge -Sign him up. Sign him! Please sign him.

Aaron Hicks - Same as Sanchez.

**Can someone please tell the networks that these are the baseball playoffs. Why do I have to search to find out what channel they're on. Yesterday, 4 games,  the first game started at 2:00 pm, the last one at 9:00 pm. Why? So they could get in at least 10 hours of commercials. At one time, there would be two games on at once and you could pick which one you wanted to watch and they would break in and show anything exciting from the other game. What was wrong with that? Well, you'd miss out on a bunch of ads for Metamucil or Kraft salad dressing. I make my own salad dressing but I could use the Metamucil.

**My pet peeve. Giancarlo Stanton played in 140 games this year. He's paid $25 million a year. That's about $40,000 every time he steps into the batter's box. When you hit the ball, RUN. You can admire the home run on YouTube later. Boone should tell his players that they will be fined $20,000 for every base they lose by loafing. Some players will lose 1/2 million dollars by the All-Star break.

**I lose interest in the playoffs when the Yankees are out of it, but this year, I'm going to root for the Dodgers in deference to my California sister-in-law, Pauline.

***THEY SAID IT***

{Apparently this is 'Pick on Urban Meyer' week - CP}

"Urban Meyer still adjusting to speed of NFL cover-ups."  -- TheOnion. com

"If you’re breathing a sigh of relief because home plate umpire Joe West didn’t really affect the results of tonight’s NL Wild Card game. Home plate umpire for game two of the NLDS will be …. Angel Hernandez!?!  So much for “no crying in baseball.”"  -- Janice Hough

"In 1978, Bucky Dent was nearing second base when his three-run homer cleared the wall in that one-game playoff in Fenway. Monday, “Stanton was barely out of the batter’s box when his ball hit the wall.”  -- NY Post reader Scott Wolinetz

"So is Urban Meyer still the Jacksonville Jaguars coach because their owner feels like the season is lost anyway, and doesn’t know if he can get out of paying Meyer $12 million a year?"  -- Janice Hough

"The Jets and Falcons — both 1-3 and outscored by a combined 97 points — play in London on Sunday. Apparently they didn’t qualify for the witness-protection program, so they opted for a change of venue."  -- Dwight Perry

"Nebraska 21-Northwestern 0. This is what happens when the Huskers play a team where the players actually have to go to class."  -- Brad Dickson

"According to the N.Y. Post, in 1962 Johnny Carson’s wife, Joanne, was having an affair with Giants receiver Frank Gifford. Typical of Gifford, he said he wasn't getting enough touches."  -- RJ Currie

"After Urban Meyer became Ohio St.’s ex-coach for hiring an assistant coach he knew to beat his wife, what was the name of that course he taught at OSU? Oh, yeah, “Leadership and Character.”  -- Phil Mushnick

"Shaquille O’Neal has renounced celebrity status and all that it stands for. Does this mean we won’t see his face on TV every 5 minutes?"  -- Nick Canepa

"The priest, the rabbi and the horse from the “walked into a bar” jokes — at least temporarily — have been replaced by Urban Meyer.So it’s probably not a good idea to ask “Why the long face?” even if he does have an 0-4 record."  -- Dwight Perry

"Breaking news: Snoop Dogg will be the Super Bowl halftime performer. Which answers the age old question: do the halftime performers need to pass a drug test? No."  -- Brad Dickson

Chad Picasner




 

Saturday, October 02, 2021

THIS IS WHEN BASEBALL REALLY STARTS

 ESPN doesn't know it but the Major League baseball season is still going on.The cream has basically risen to the top with one or two teams disappointed by losing out on the post season play because of a crucial late season loss.

**There is a rumor that Umpire Joe West is going to retire at the end of the season. Boy, will that be a big retirement party. I can only hope that Angel Hernandez  gets the hint and retires, too. That party will be even bigger.

**I've seen players on a hot streak. I've seen Don Mattingly hit six grand slams in one season. I've seen him hit home runs in eight consecutive games. Giancarlo Stanton's streak is absolutely scary. Homers in four consecutive games is amazing in it's own right, but his homers are coming late in a game with men on base in a crucial series. That's hitting in pressure situations. Back in the 50's & 60's, opposing pitchers would rather face  Mickey Mantle with the game on the line than have to pitch to Yogi Berra in that situation. Yogi was the Yankee's best clutch hitter ever, but Stanton looks like he's going after the title. 

**The Yankee season has been a yo-yo all year. Just a couple of weeks ago, the Yanks chance of making the post season was in the 30's and Boston's was in the 80's. Now, in the final 6 games, those numbers are reversed. It's amazing how a teams fortunes can change so quickly. As John Sterling, Yankee radio announcer would say, "That's baseball, Susan." So, New York, Boston, Toronto and Seattle will be fighting for two playoff spots.

**In the National League West, the Giants and the Dodgers are fighting for the division championship. Their records are almost exactly the same. Unfortunately, one of them will be severely handicapped in the post season because they will have to play a one game playoff just to get into the Division Championship series. The Dodgers have an uphill battle having to play the final three against the Milwaukee Brewers, winners of the NL Central, while the Giants finish against the disappointing  San Diego Padres. 

This should be some weekend in baseball.

**It's close to college basketball season, so be prepared to briefly watch your team's bast player. 
As Groucho Marx once sang, “Hello, I must be going.” And it’s not just John Calipari’s one-and-done Kentucky, not anymore. That’s the plan for many. Student-athletics. Why don't they just change it to "Occasional Student-Athlete?"

***THEY SAID IT***

"Brewers star set-up reliever Devin Williams is out for the season after breaking a bone in his pitching hand punching a wall after Milwaukee celebrated clinching the division Sunday night “Siri, What does the expression mean – “Million dollar arm ten-cent head?”   -- Janice Hough 

"Don’t know about the IBF or WBA, but the WHL title belt belongs to the Vancouver Giants, after a cross-checking major assessed to Kyle Bochek against Victoria erupted into eight fighting majors and nine game misconducts.And that was in a preseason game."  -- Dwight Perry

"According to the N.Y. Post, in 1962 Johnny Carson’s wife, Joanne, was having an affair with Giants receiver Frank Gifford. Typical of Gifford, he said he wasn't getting enough touches."  -- RJ Currie

"Ohio State has announced that despite being tossed from the football team for rotten behavior, including the since-deleted tweet, “fucc Ohio State,” linebacker K’Vaughan Pope will be allowed to remain in school to continue “his progress toward graduation.” Graduation? He doesn’t even seem able to spell."  -- Phil Mushnick

"Kyrie Irving is the most discussed anti-vaxxer in pro sports. Kyrie is also a Flat Earther. Well, there's a shock."  -- Brad Dickson

"Anti-vaxxer Cam Newton remains unsigned. Now teams won’t touch Newton with a 10-foot swab."  -- Alex Kaseberg 

"The Toronto Blue Jays trail only the Houston Astros with 1331 hits this season. They've put more men in scoring position than  Paris Hilton."  -- RJ Currie

"Tyler Pence became the first U.S. runner since 2001 to win the Quad Cities Marathon when the volunteer bicycle rider leading the two frontrunning Kenyans mistakenly went straight when he should have turned.They lost out on the $3,000 first prize, but are considered the early favorites for this year’s Wrong-Way Kerrigan Award."  -- Dwight Perry

"What a horrible time for sports in Detroit. The Red Wings are lousy, the Lions are worse. The Pistons are last in the NBA and the Tigers are 11th in the American League."  -- Steve Simmons 

"Bozo NFL kicker who booted the amazing 66-yard field goal later thanked God. So that's why all these Covid wards are full of people struggling on ventilators - God is busy guiding field goals through uprights."  -- Brad Dickson

"It takes a village to make an idiot: To hear hundreds of U.S. team Ryder Cup spectators cheer bad shots and missed putts by the European team has been more sickening than surprising. And the pandering silence about it from NBC’s voices has been equally sickening and unsurprising. Our “sports culture” continues to dissolve."  -- Phil Mushnick

Chad Picasner

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Saturday, September 25, 2021

THIS RANT HAS BEEN OVERDUE

I'm getting sicker and sicker of sports announcers talking as though they are getting paid by the word. They drone on and on with worthless stats instead of HONESTLY talking about what we all see. Please stop these useless pronouncements:

**We are not as enamored with exit velocities as you are. When Giancarlo Stanton hits a ground ball that the defense turns into a double play, it's no consolation that the E.V. was 109 MPH. Also, forget the home run distances. I don't believe half of those estimates anyway. If it's over the fence, it's a homer. 'Nuff said.

**Stop the contrived and misleading stats. "In the last 9 games, So & So is hitting .305."  What the hell does that mean? Why 9 games? What happened in the last 10 games? Or the last 8 games? How would that change his average? Torres has 16 homers against Baltimore. Of course, 14 of them came in one season TWO years ago. 

**David Cone, you're a smart guy put cut back on the sabermetrics. Paul O'Neill is more fun to listen to because he doesn't take the game too seriously. He's the guy I want to sit next to because he's funny and he does know the game. Plus, he gets better food.

**Cut back on the celebrities in the stands. And the little kids and the "honey" shots. 

**And please: just shut up and let the game happen. It's TV, I don't need you to tell me a guy just struck out. 

It seems the media has a procedure in places that says, If it isn't a story, keep reporting on it till it becomes an issue. On Monday, Kevin Kiermaier  picked up a scouting card that fell off the wristband of Blue Jays catcher Alejandro Kirk during a play at the plate. He brought it into the Tampa dugout. The two managers said it was no big deal that is was "...agua under the bridge." End of story, right? OH no, says the media. By the time they finished making a big deal out of it, Kiermaier had been intentionally hit by a pitch, dugouts had emptied and people were ejected and Blue Jays pitcher Ryan Borucki has been suspended for three days, all over a card that was of no use to anyone. I can see reporters sitting in a room, rubbing their hands together with an evil chuckle, saying, "Aha, we did it."

Finally. my friend,  Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times, has been cleared to return to work as the night sports editor of the paper. Welcome back, Dwight, we've missed you.

***THEY SAID IT***

"Instead of picking the winners of college football games Ashton Kutcher should be in acting class."  -- Brad Dickson

"Toronto came in second in a world ranking of 100 cities having a good reputation. Or 99th if you include the Maple Leafs."  -- RJ Currie

"These are whacky times. The Padres’ Manny Machado, who admitted running to first base “is not my cup of tea,”  recently bashed teammate Fernando Tatis Jr for being selfish, for thinking, “It’s all about you.”"  -- Phil Mushnick

"ESPN headline “Mountcastle, Hays HR help Orioles beat skidding Rangers 3-0.” Uh, Texas Rangers are 55-98. “Skidding?” More like a continuance of their race to catch the 49-104 Orioles on the way to the bottom."  -- Janice Hough

"There is now a shortage of cheap whiskey in America. So does that mean University of Missouri home football games are canceled?"  -- Brad Dickson

"I’m not saying St. Louis baseball fans are spoiled. But they call errors Cardinal sins."  -- RJ Currie

 "Green Bay Packers looked pretty miserable the first week of season against New Orleans Saints. Fortunately the NFL sometimes has a cure for that. It’s called playing the Detroit Lions."  -- Janice Hough

"Florida has offered a full scholarship to an eighth grade QB, Julian Lewis. Seriously. Guess he already meets the academic requirements. Seriously."  -- Phil Mushnick

Chad Picasner


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Friday, July 09, 2021

YEAH, I'M STILL AROUND

 It's always good to be passionate about something you perceive to be wrong. If you're having trouble finding something, just pay attention to Major League Baseball, their trends and their policies. 

**Baseball has had double headers for years. Two games on the same day with a 20-30 minute gap in between. Back in the 50's & 60's, when I first started watching, teams only carried 9 or 10 pitchers and they had to hit, so the other 14 or 15 players were position players, and most of them played in the two games. Starting pitchers pitched every four days and usually lasted for 7 innings or more. They weren't pulled after 100 pitches, partially because managers couldn't count that high. The best players played all nine innings of both games. No one "needed a day off," and it was rare for someone to go on the DL (Disabled List) unless they had a broken leg. There was no Tommy John surgery (there wasn't even a Tommy John) and starters often came in relief to get out of a critical jam. 

**Now, MLB has "fixed" a problem that didn't exist back then and probably wouldn't exist today if Commissioner Rob Manfred would spend summers lounging on a beach in the Bahama's with no cell service instead of interfering in the game. Manfred has made double headers into two seven-inning games, and if that wasn't bad enough, he allows day-night games. That means they empty the stadium after one game and charge a separate admission for the 2nd game. So those of you who bought tickets for a nine inning game...well, screw you. And there is no such thing as a no-hitter in a seven inning game. 

**I read a solution that sounds good to me. Two games with a 20 minute gap: first game is 9 innings. the second game is 7 innings. A day-night double header is TWO NINE INNING GAMES. Do something to benefit the fans instead of the teams front office. I doubt they need the money since they can afford to pay pitchers $30+ million a year to pitch in 30 games, seven innings at a time, of course.

**You want to do something  to improve the game, Rob? Here is a three-word suggestion: Fire Angel Hernandez. At least once a week, I red this headline - Angel Hernandez makes a bad call. Newspapers could save a lot of ink if  they ran this headline when possible: Angel got one right. We won't see that one too often.

**Take your kid to a game and this is what he might see: 1) four umpires converging to decide what to call. 2) everyone stand around for 2 or 3 minutes while someone on New York tells the umpires what they really saw and not what they called. 3) pitchers being strip-searched to see if they have a foreign substance on them - or maybe the wrong flavor bubble gum, we're not sure. You may have to explain to your kid why the 2nd baseman looks like he's playing right field or why the shortstop appears to be playing 2nd base. 4) "Why are three guys playing shortstop, Daddy? Don't they like the 1st baseman?"  He might see some baseball, too but don't count on it.  

**I am not a big fan of today's analytics. Sure, I like numbers and some of those numbers are interesting, but I don't believe they should control the game. There is an increasing feeling that saber-metrics are controlling baseball to the detriment of the sport. The Yankees have a whole department designed to come up with stats that supposedly make decisions easier. When it works, they are quick to point out how perfect they are. When it doesn't, they say, "Well, it was still the right decision."  

Michael Fishman runs that department for the Yankees. He is quick to say that analytics are only a tool used in making decisions as to what players to sign, who gets on the field, who gets pulled, basically everything. According to Fishman:
"There are a lot of decisions that go opposite of what analytics [recommend]. I think it is an over-characterization of analytics winning the day. There is so much that goes into every decision. A lot of decisions are made that are the opposite of the analytical recommendation." Ah, now it gets interesting. This is what Joel Sherman, who conducted the interview, followed up with:   " But when I asked if he could provide examples of where analytics did not carry the day and scouting did, Fishman did not respond for 10 seconds, then said, “I can’t think of a good example off the top of my head. They are numerous."

As Perry Mason might say, I rest my case. 

**You say you like numbers? Here's two for you to contemplate. The NY Yankees charge $45 for parking. The NY Mets charge $15.25 for a 24 ounce beer. 

***THEY SAID IT***

"The Basel Convention recently added plastics to their amendments on international hazardous waste. Speaking of trash-talking, tonight is the start of the NBA finals."  -- RJ Currie

"With the Olympics due to start in a couple weeks, Tokyo has declared a COVID state of emergency. It’s now quite likely NO fans will be able to attend, even locals. Of all the stupid decisions the IOC has made over the years, will the stupidest turn out to be the decision to have these games at all?"  -- Janice Hough

"If you have to decide who your starting goalie is, then you don't have a starting goalie."  -- Steve Simmons 

"Blue Jays manager, Charlie Montoyo  calling for the bullpen to help is like calling Tiger Woods for emergency roadside assistance."  -- Patti Dawn Swansson

"Buffalo wide receiver Cole Beasley says he won't get vaccinated and "I may die of COVID but I'd rather die actually living." How many times has this guy been hit in the head again?"  -- Ron Borges

"If only Aaron Boone were as tough on his players as he is on umpires. Three times in a week, Yankee players didn't know how many outs there were. Counting to three is difficult."  -- Phil Mushnick [Where is Mike Fishman when you need him? - Chad Picasner]

"A 12-year-old New Jersey boy has been named a chess grand master. When I was 12 I was trying to figure out how to get my new checkers board out of the box it came in."  -- Brad Dickson

Chad Picasner

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thursday, June 17, 2021

DOES ANYONE HERE KNOW HOW TO PLAY THIS GAME?

** If you watch a game on TV, at some point the announcers will tell you about exit velocities and launch angles. Why? Because baseball today thinks it's sexy. We all love the three-run blast but we've turned the game into a home run derby and not the game of baseball. Broadcasters explain away strike outs because "they don't matter anymore."  Yes, they do. It's called an out and you only get 27 of them a game. Earl Weaver used to hate the bunt sacrifice for just that reason.  He never wanted to give an out away.

Then, out of the other side of their mouths, announcers will lament the lack of hitting and scoring. If you put the ball in play, things happen. Sure, you might make an out but somebody may misplay the ball or the ball might find a gap in the defense.  Either way, you get on base. That's important because NOBODY ever scored a run while sitting on the bench. If you strike out. neither of those two things can happen. Secondly, I was taught that if you do strike out, you immediately check to see if the catcher dropped the ball so you could run to first and perhaps get on. If the catcher throws you out, so what? You were already out, but you can force him to make the play and then things can go wrong.

If you swing from the heels on every pitch, your odds of hitting go down. If you swing at pitches that are out of the strike zone,  you've reduced your chances of hitting the ball. Pitchers are smart. If you swing at pitches that are low and away, out of the strike zone, count on seeing a lot of them. There's a reason they call it the Strike Zone. It's where it's easiest to strike the ball. These are the reasons  we've seen six no-hitters already this season. And I believe we will see more.

**Problem number two can be blamed on the people responsible for teaching the game. They aren't teaching the GAME, they're teaching Home run hitting and strike out pitching. To score a run, you need to touch all four bases - and I shouldn't have to say this - in order. It's called base running, boys and girls and there are maybe a dozen current players who know how to do it. 

MLB's answer, of course, is so silly it defies logic. "You want more base running in the game? Sure, it's easy. We'll make the bases 3 inches bigger so it will be easier to steal." Add to that the oven mitt players are allowed to wear and reaching 2nd base from first involves taking 4 steps and falling down with your arm outstretched and you're at 2nd base.

**I don't really follow Pro Basketball, but there's still time since the Championship games may last as long as July 22. If you miss that, training camps open on September 28. What are we going to do for those two months?

***THEY SAID IT***

"For those of you watching in black and white, Spurs are in the all-yellow strip."  -- Comentator John Motson

"As MLB finalizes its memo on rule pitchers using foreign substances, reminded of Gaylord Perry when he was asked if he ever used a foreign substance on a baseball. "Nah, Vaseline is manufactured right here in the United States."  -- Janice Hough 

"Several years ago U.S. tennis star, Sloane Stephens, said she wished "boys weren’t so stupid." I'm guessing now that she has matured, she wishes men weren't so stupid."  -- RJ Currie 

"All CWS tickets are digital this year. You need a smart device to get into the stadium...it's just as well that Arkansas didn't qualify."  -- Brad Dickson

"I watched the excerpts of NBC reporter’s interview with Putin. I give Vlad credit. He answered all the tough geopolitical questions cogently, directly, thoroughly. But boy did he hem and haw when asked whether he’s ever used Spider Tack"  -- Marc Ragovin 

"Sure, there have been some injuries and deaths in boxing, but none of them really serious."  -- Boxer Alan Minter

 "CONCACAF Nations League final between United States & Mexico was marred Sunday by unruly fan behavior that included objects thrown on the field. Where did fans think they were, at an NBA playoff game?"  -- Janice Hough

 "CivicScience polled 2,621 adult Americans and they had Aaron Rogers trailing only all-time quiz whiz Ken Jennings as the preferred choice to succeed Alex Trebek. Meanwhile, in  POLL OD Green Bay Packer fans, Rogers was the number one choice to be tarred and feathered."  -- Patti Dawn Swansson

 "I saw where Joe West just set a MLB record by umpiring his 5376th game. By my calculations, that means he's been cussed at 1.978,455 times."  -- Mike Bianch

 "Reader Frank Macy, watching the College Softball World Series on ESPN, heard that thus far Oklahoma’s record is 56-4. “Sixty games! When do these student-athletes attend school?” You looking to make trouble, Frank? Sooners fans don’t take kindly to your type."  -- Phil Mushnick

Chad Picasner

Friday, June 11, 2021

THAT CRABBY OLD MAN IS BACK

 I can be really old fashioned, but sometimes, I not only enjoy it, but I insist other people act like that, too.

**What is with all the cursing? Why is a curse word a better adjective than the hundreds that are available that aren't profane. I understand that you're passionate about things, so am I. Read some of my blogs. You won't find one use of the "F" word. Oh, I've said it, but at home or alone and then very sparingly. CC Sabathia is a prime example of a celebrity who can't get through a sentence without profanity. Now, it's spread in stadiums and arenas. Do they think it's cute? A friend of mind owns a pub and I visited one time and noticed a couple of signs behind the bar. "Use of the F-Bomb will cost you a fine of 25 cents each time" I asked him if it was just a way to make a little extra money and he said, "No. It got so bad, I was embarrassed to be in my own bar. People laugh when they read it, but the cursing has pretty much stopped." Unfortunately, that won't work with these overpaid celebrities even if the fine was $100,000.

**If you buy a ticket to a sporting event, you have the right to cheer for a team or a player or to jeer for them (no cursing) if it's not the team you root for. You can wear clothing emblazoned with your team logos or names maybe even display a sign. But, you DO NOT have the right to throw things at the players. Anything! Would you dump a beer on your son because he made an error? Would you throw a battery at your daughter because she let in a goal? Of course not. However, the player you dumped a box of popcorn on is someone else's son.Would you do it if you were sitting next to the mother of that girl you threw a half-eaten hot dog at? It's just a game, it's not life or death. 

**We travel around the country on vacations and try to see baseball games in the cities we're in, and sometimes wear Yankee paraphernalia whether the Yanks are playing or not, because we like the sport. When people ask if we're Yankee fans, we like to respond, "No, we're baseball fans who happen to root for the Yankees."  People react well to that. My Dad once told me not to root against the other team but cheer for yours instead. I slip up sometimes, but it remains good advice.

**We have a problem, boys and girls. Jacob DeGrom, arguably the Best Pitcher On The Planet. was taped actually touching his belt on the mound after throwing a pitch. He then touched his glove. Do you know what this means? Yeah, I don't either. He doesn't need any artificial means when he pitches, but the use of stick-ems of some kind is in the news, so let's find somebody doing something and suggest some wrong-doing. This is what I call a "media blow -up." They can't just broadcast a sporting event, they have to create some major controversy so viewers won't become bored.  They tried the same tactic in the NY-Minn.game on Wednesday. Josh Donaldson of the Twins suggested the Gerrit Cole (another BPOTP) was using some illegal substance but quit for one game and got hammered, so obviously, in Donaldson's mind at least, he must have been cheating before. Broadcasters couldn't wait for Cole to pitch to Donaldson, suggesting that Cole would throw at him and benches would empty and there would be a brawl. How silly. Minnesota would love for that to happen so they could get Cole thrown out of the game. When that didn't happen and Cole struck out Donaldson, the clowns (sorry, don't mean to insult clowns) in the booth claim that Cole stared down Donaldson as he walked back to the booth. Listen David Cone, that didn't happen. no matter how many replays you show, there was no stare down.   I guess you're going to have to come up with different fake controversy.

***THEY SAID IT***

"Sign of returning to normalcy – Sunday night baseball Yankees -Red Sox."  -- Janice Hough

"Among the funniest things I’ve read was stenciled to a door in old Tiger Stadium. It read, “Visitors Clubhouse, No Visitors.”"  -- Phil Mushnick 

"Floyd Mayweather is expected to make between $50 million and $100 million tonight fighting a reality TV star whose record is 0-1, having lost to another reality star. Is this a great country or what?"  -- Brad Dickson

"MLB has 6 no-hitters all ready. Normally,they only have two no-hiters a year and sometimes none. Who would have guessed that a symptom of COVID-19 would be batters hitting like one of the Kardashian sisters.?"  -- Alex Kaseberg

"Show me a guy who thinks baseball statisticians are the most likely to throw obscure and irrelevant facts into an argument, and I'll show you a guy who's never had a wife."  -- RJ Currie 

"You’ll recall that Mark McGwire, questioned by Congress about steroid use, played dumb. Sammy Sosa came to the sudden, comical realization that he could no longer speak nor understand English, not even the plain kind."  -- Phil Mushnick

"NY Knicks are out, LA Lakers and Clippers each one game from elimination. ABC and ESPN now beginning to feel like FOX feels when the Dodgers, Cubs, Yankees and/or Red Sox aren’t in the World Series?"  -- Janice Hough

"The Cleveland Browns reportedly are passing on the prospect of Odell Beckham being joined by Julio Jones. Or as one veteran diva-watcher put it, ‘Why add Madonna when you already have Mariah Carey?’  -- Bill Littlejohn

 "The USA reportedly has the most billionaires of anywhere in the world. A close second is the New York Yankees clubhouse."  -- RJ Currie

"Finally, let me close with an observation from the noted satirist, Jonathan Swift, that may relate to those players in the NBA Draft pool who will end up undrafted:“Happiness is the perpetual possession of being well deceived.”"  -- Jack Finarelli

"Stop complaining about the regional the Nebraska baseball team was assigned. All they gotta do is beat Arkansas, the N.Y. Yankees & the Cuban Olympic team and they're in the College World Series."  -- Brad Dickson

 Chad Picasner

 

 

Thursday, May 27, 2021

A PERSONAL REQUEST

 Those of you who follow my blog are aware of my friend Dwight Perry's hilarious thoughts that often find their way in my postings. We have been friends for more than 10 years and I had been reading his column for many years before that.

He has been having a tough time medically for the last few weeks since he suffered a mild stroke which has slowed him down considerable. He is confined to his bed and really can't operate a keyboard yet, but I'm sure he would like hearing from friends, and fans. 

You can send him an e-mail   {dwight Perry <dperry@seattletimes.com>} or send him a card to

Dwight Perry

% Seattle Times

P.O. Box 70

Seattle , WA  98111

Thank you all

Chad Picasner

JUST 'CAUSE YOU'RE RICH DOESN'T MEAN YOU'RE SMART

 ...or invincible. It's understandable when ballplayers strain a tendon while running or crack a rib when diving for a ball or even dislocating a shoulder when running into a wall. Ballplayers, however,  can find ways to injure themselves even when they're not on the field...or in the ball park. Like these unfortunate (or dumb)  methods that lead to Injury List time:

## We've heard of players who break a bone punching a wall out of frustration, but Huascar Ynoa thought he solved that by punching something padded like the bench. It didn't help, he broke his pitching hand.

## Jesus Lazardo broke a pinky finger slamming his hand on a desk in frustration over a video game. Jesus reportedly said it was  because he'd  failed once again to beat level 6 in the game.

## Zack Wheeler injured a nail on his pitching hand putting on his pants. Maybe the pants didn't like his choice of shirts.

## The deadly clothing injury continued when Zack Plesac injured a thumb when he "...aggressively took off his shirt."  He thought he was okay because Wheeler told him it was the pants that were deadly.

## Jose Quintana cut his thumb washing dishes at home. His wife said he'd do anything to get out of doing chores.

## Shawn also cut his thumb while doing dishes. When are ballplayers going to learn to leave these dangerous jobs to the professionals?

## Carlos Correa missed a few games because his ribs were sore. It turns out that the cause was a massage at home. An aggressive massage after an argument with his wife perhaps?

## Sammy Sosa sprained a ligament in his lower back when he sneezed. Apparently the subsequent "god bless you" didn't help.

## Finally, Jeremy Affeldt is a real danger to himself. He cut his finger trying to separate frozen hamburger patties, sprained his knee when his 4-year old jumped in his arms and dislocated his knee while playing with his kids. I hope he's married to a nurse.

**Country Joe West has umpired 5367 games to date. The number is mind-boggling. If an umpire was to umpire 140 games a season, it would take him more than 38 years to catch up to West...and Joe is not done. I read where West has thrown 193 people out of a game in his career. If someone said he did that in one season, I would believe it. His actual average is one ejection per every 28 games or one a month. He is supposedly the best umpire in baseball and that my be true, but my complaint is that he has rabbit ears and goes looking for a fight. If he just had a shorter fuse I think he'd be revered. But then he wouldn't be Country Joe West.

**I remember back in the early 70's, watching game seven of the NBA finals on May 8th. This year, it's possible this Game Seven will be played the third week of July. All the teams not in the finals will probably be in their respective training camps. Just to keep things in perspective.

***THEY SAID IT***

"Wonder after his PGA victory if Phil Mickelson will be invited on any of Monday’s late-night talk shows? Of course Lefty may first have to schedule a nap to stay up that late."  -- Janice Hough

"Michael Jordan’s only known game-worn North Carolina basketball jersey sold at auction for $1.38 million on May 8. Imagine, then, what a once-opened Rob Gronkowski textbook from Arizona might fetch."  -- Dwight Perry

"There's a proposal to allow even more instant-replay reviews in college basketball. We need this as much as Olympic swimming events needs lifeguards."  -- Jack Finarelli 

"A video shows a San Diego Padres fan knocking out a Colorado Rockies fan with one punch. The Rockies fan tried to defend himself, but like the 13-24 Colorado team, he swung three times and missed."  -- Alex Kaseberg

"LeBron said he made that big 3-pointer "Thanks to the grace of God." So that's why God hasn't helped with the Covid situation in India - he's busy making sure LeBron gets back to the playoffs."  -- Brad Dickson

"Jacob DeGrom looked great in striking out eight and walking none over three shutout innings Thursday during a rehab start for the St. Lucie Mets, New York’s low Class A affiliate. But of course, that is against low A ball hitters. I guess the Seattle Mariners weren’t available."  -- Janice Hough

"Not sure why TSN calls the Jets-Oilers series the renewal of an "NHL playoff rivalry." The Jets have lost all six series to Edmonton in the postseason — the fly to the Oilers' swatter."  -- RJ Currie

"Park Crossing High School’s 46-45 win over Lanier in the Alabama Class 6A girls softball regionals featured 29 batters hit by pitches and 65 walks.Somewhere, Bob “Just A Bit Outside” Uecker was smiling."  -- Dwight Perry

"The Kentucky Derby drew 14.5 million TV viewers. Meanwhile, 12.6 million watched the first night of the NFL draft — three hours of reading out the names of other people’s children."  -- Bob Molinaro

"How much do I favor animals over people? Last night HBO replayed the original "Jaws" from '75 and I was rooting for the shark."  -- Brad Dickson

Chad Picasner








 

Thursday, May 20, 2021

I JUST WANT TO WATCH THE GAME

 **I suppose color commentators feel they have to justify their existence, but why do we have to have every situation analyzed down to the smallest detail, using stats and formulas that very quickly lose their meaning because they're so technical. We use to say things like, "Hey he's a good hitter. You can count on him in the clutch," and then go back to just watching - and enjoying - the game. Now, the broadcasters tell us not only what a particular player has done in this situation in the past, but what his odds are to repeat that performance in the current situation. We always knew when Yogi Berra came up in a crucial situation, he would probably succeed. We didn't need statistics to tell us that. Watching the pitcher in silent prayer on the mound was all we needed to know. Please, let us go back to the Joe Garagiola method of situation analysis of a crucial situation: "We won't have to talk. Just listen, the crowd will tell us the story."

**I have never understood why managers feel they have to inject themselves into making unnecessary moves to assure a victory. If a pitcher is doing well, why take him out? Sure, maybe you can tell if a starter is getting tired after 6 innings and you should replace him, but don't do it just because he's reached a certain pitch count. And then why parade a different reliever every inning just because you have them? Pitchers don't always have their best stuff every time out, so why keep changing pitchers until you find the guy that's having an off night? Just to carry the ridiculous analytics to the extreme, Phil Mushnick of the NY Post, offers two more appropriate cybernetic theories. He suggests GLPC, - Game Lost to Pitch Count. Or try GLAPCGame Lost to Absurd Pitching Changes. I'll bet one or both of these occur every game. 

I think another reason these things occurs because managers don't want to have to justify any decision they make, to reporters or the front office. It was aptly put in the movie "Moneyball," when the manager explained to the GM why he was playing certain players against the wishes of the GM. "I'm managing the game in a way I can explain in interviews this winter." In other words, who cares if I'm right or wrong just so what I do isn't second guessed if it doesn't work. 

**This argument has reared it's ugly head again this week. It's the old 'Unwritten Baseball Rules.' Case in point: White Sox DH Yermin Mercedes hit a home run on a 3-0 count in the 9th inning against a position player who was pitching at the time. The problem was the score was 15-4 against the Twins. Unwritten Rules say you take in that situation. Even Sox manager Tony La Russa was upset that he swung, compounding the issue by suggesting some kind of punishment was due. I'm sure La Russa Thought he was only voicing what the players all thought, but even the players on his team don't agree with him. La Russa keeps proving he's out of touch with today's players.

I have never been in agreement with this rule. Aren't you supposed to try as hard as you can ALL the time?  If I'm at bat with two outs in the ninth inning and the pitcher is one out away from a perfect game, shouldn't I be trying to ruin that, regardless of the score? The opposing team is trying their best to get me out. They'll even stack the deck by putting on an extreme shift, in effect counting on the fact that I won't take advantage of that. If the third baseman in that scenario is playing 10 feet from second base leaving the whole left side of the infield empty, I'm bunting down the third base line for a hit. Nobody is going to throw a perfect game against my team if I can help it. If you want a perfect game, earn it the right way. Don't count on me not trying my best to beat you or prevent your perfect game. If you want to throw at me the next time we play you, I'm okay with that, but I WILL bunt again in that situation.

***THEY SAID IT***

"In the eighth and ninth innings, I was having a mini-panic attack every time I went out there. So I was extremely nervous."  -- Yankee catcher Kyle Higashioka on Kluber's no-hitter

" For 2021 season, Seattle is hitting .199 as a TEAM? Can we change their names from the Mariners to the Mendozas?"  -- Janice Hough 

"What a great country this is when tomorrow we can gather in large groups, indoors & maskless, to watch a horse on performance enhancing drugs run in the Preakness Stakes."  -- Brad Dickson

 "According to a recent study, tragedy makes you think about sex. In a related story, Toronto Maple Leafs fans are dirty minded"  -- RJ Currie

 "As of today, the Seattle Mariners as a team are batting .199; the Mariners have been the victims of two of this year’s no-hitters.  Seems like a correlation there."  -- Jack Finarelli

 "The Atlanta Falcons signed undrafted Jack Batho IV, a 6-foot-7, 315-pound tackle from South Dakota School of the Mines. Hey, if a guy from there can’t open a hole, who can?"  -- Dwight Perry

 "Two small planes collided over Colorado & miraculously nobody was hurt. Meanwhile every year at least one major league baseball player misses half the season after injuring himself with a can opener or dental floss."  -- Brad Dickson

"In 2019, Ohio Stadium, home to the Buckeyes, expanded seating capacity to 102,780. Not to be outdone, the Saskatchewan Huskies added another folding chair to their luxury box."  -- RJ Currie

"Marv Albert is retiring and he will be missed. He loved games of any kind, from stoopball to tennis. At nearly 80, he’s still a kid waiting for you to come out to play."  -- Phil Mushnick

 "Um, I just think it was a lot of fun,” he said, before complimenting both teams for playing well. “It was just fun to be a part of."  -- Corey Kluber on his no-hitter

Chad Picasner

 


Thursday, May 13, 2021

ANGEL MY ANGEL

 **MLB umpire Angel Hernandez said that he was forced to guess if a fly ball was caught Tuesday night because of the outfield scoreboard on the wall at Kauffman Stadium. And he guessed wrong. Two things: 1) Angel always guesses  2) He always guesses wrong.

**Sad to see the probable end to Albert Pujols' career. One of the greatest hitters ever. We were lucky enough to see him play when we attended a Pirates game some years ago and double lucky to see him hit a home run. Pujols, I understand, is insistent that he's not done playing, but I can't see anyone picking him up. With all the emphasis on pitching these days, I don't believe a team would give up roster spot to add someone whose skills have diminished so greatly.

**I like numbers and baseball stats, but I think the way Sabermetrics is ruling the game right now has taken a lot of the enjoyment away from me. If that isn't enough, now broadcasters and sports writers are making up stats to make everything that happens a major event. A player can't do anything - and I mean anything - without some talking head making it into a record of some kind. The length they go to emphasize an accomplishment, no matter how small or insignificant, is getting ridiculous. Case in point, this item in Phil Mushnick's column of May 6th:

From a telecast of a recent Mariners/Orioles game

"It read that the Mariners’ J.P. Crawford is now the seventh major leaguer with “17-Plus Hits And 13-Plus RBIs In His First 11 Career Games Vs. Baltimore, Since 1954” (when the St. Louis Browns moved to Baltimore). If you find significance in that info, you’re an idiot — no offense, of course."

**Sorry the blog is a little late this week, but I got side tracked by the rat in my hallway, and...wait...what? Oh Annie says it's just a racoon, so, never mind. I thought I was in Citifield in New York there for a moment.

**There is generally a lack of hitting by most teams in baseball this season. The Yankees won two out of three from the Washington Nationals this past weekend and they did it by scoring only 11 runs on 16 hits. Of course, a lot of that was thanks to the Nats closer, Brad Hand, who blew the save twice in the second game and allowed the winning run in the bottom of the ninth on Sunday. I'm guessing that won't appear in his highlight reel.

**Trevor Bauer is unhappy that his team, the LA Dodgers are not winning the way he wants. "
I freaking hate losing. That’s why I came here." You'd think that $34 million a year that he makes would ease some of the pain.

**I just watched a video of Mets pitcher Taijuan Walker batting against Matt Harvey of the Orioles last night. If ever there was an argument for pitchers NEVER getting into the batters box, this is it! Walker never moved a muscle while Harvey poured three straight pitches across the plate. Every time this discussion starts, there will be some people who drag out 5 or 6 pitchers who can hit as an argument against the designated hitter rule. a very weak argument if you consider that teams carry 10 to 12 pitchers on the active roster which translates into about 330 pitchers in the majors. That means that approximately 2% of the pitchers can hit. That's 2%. What happened between Harvey and Walker is a total disgrace. Wake up MLB.

***THEY SAID IT***

"BuzzFeed recently published the top 10 words in tabloid headlines — baby; secret; wedding; pregnant; marriage; sex; shocking; cheating; divorce; diet. Until that last word, anyone thinking NBA?"  -- RJ Currie

"Ugh, Kentucky Derby winner Medina Spirit fails drug test. Will he blame it on tainted hay from a stablemate?"  -- Janice Hough

"After every Super Bowl, the losing coach stands with his back to a cinder block wallwearing a solemn expression. When he's asked, "Coach, would you do anything different?" He invariably answers. "No!"  Me? Having just lost the Super Bowl I'd confess that given a second chance I'd do everything differently."  -- Phil Mushnick

"Why did Nebraska schedule a football game against Fordham. Very simple: (AD Bill) Moos and (coach Scott) Frost desperately need wins to keep their jobs, and their first choice — a driving school in Denison, Iowa — doesn’t field a team.”  -- Brad Dickson

"When I was 20, I faced Bob Gibson for the first time in an exhibition (game) in Florida. He knocked me down four times and walked me. As I walked to first base, he said, ‘Don’t even try to steal.’ I didn’t.”  -- Rod Carew

 "There's a proposal to allow even more instant-replay reviews in college basketball. We need this as much as Olympic swimming events need lifeguards."  -- Jack Finarelli

 "Ian Nepomniachtchchi can’t play under the Russian flag in his upcoming world-championship match because of his country’s ban from international sporting competitions by the World Anti-Doping Agency.For the record, Nepomniachtchchi plays chess."  -- Dwight Perry

"A recent survey said the U.S. city having the most sex per capita is Los Angeles, averaging 135 times a year. That drops to 12 times a year if you exclude the Lakers and Clippers."  -- RJ Currie  

"The winner of the Kentucky Derby tested positive for performance enhancing drugs. If the horse is done in racing he plans to continue his athletic career playing offensive line at Ohio State."  -- Brad Dickson

**Medina Spirit will be allowed to race in Preakness. Whatever happens, at least the horse is one athlete who can claim he didn’t have any idea he might be using a banned substance."  -- Janice Hough

Chad Picasner 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Wednesday, May 05, 2021

THINGS ARE HEATING UP

 **I simply can not believe that professional athletes continually think that they don't have to follow any rules at all. A couple of weeks ago, Steelers cornerback Justin Layne was arrested near Cleveland and charged with a felony. He was stopped in the wee hours of the morning for doing 90 miles an hour in a 60 MPH zone. He was driving on a suspended license, in possession of marijuana and the illegal possession of a gun. Somehow, Layne seemingly ignored the whole situation and complained that he was busted for just "a blunt." Just another product of the college football program. NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has never publicly commented on this event. If he did, it would be classified as an "off the field problem." So I guess unless Layne shows up in the huddle smoking weed and carrying a gun, it's not Goodell's problem.

**  Philadelphia Phillies relief pitcher Jose Alverado has been suspended for three games and fined an undisclosed amount for inciting a bench-clearing brawl with the NY Mets after taunting Mets outfielder Dominick Smith after striking him out. Just another fine example of "letting the kids play." Thank you Rob Manfred.

**MLB teams have medical staffs and training teams to keep the players healthy. The slightest injury can put players on the Injured List within seconds of a problem with these experts watching them. They also design programs to prevent others from injuring themselves. We've heard it all: Left oblique strain, rotor cuff irritation and the infamous "lower body soreness". The medical staffs have solutions to prevent further injuries of each body part. There is a new injury to report but the solution is the easiest to institute. It's simply installing Parental Controls on TVs and video games. The Oakland A's left  hander Jesus Luzardo broke his pinkie finger while playing a video game. The manager claims he accidentally bumped his hand while playing. No, he didn't. He slammed his hand the the table out of frustration while playing. Video games can do that to you, but Luardo won't have to worry about that for a while. The team has blocked the game and won't release it to Luzardo until he's old enough to  learn how to control himself. Luckily, they didn't take away his Coco Puffs.

**As of Sunday, May 5th, the Yankees are in third place in the AL East with a  record of 14-14 (.500). If they were in the NL East, they would be 3 games ahead of the first place NY Mets (11-11, .500) I guess it's true in baseball and restaurants: It's location, location, location.

**The NY Mets have fired their two hitting coaches because the team is having trouble scoring runs and have shown little power. Always true in baseball, you can't fire the players, so the coaches (and sometimes the manager) have to go. The Yankees also went through this, but eventually the players began (as Michael Kay likes to say) to hit up to the standards of the back of their baseball cards. There is too much talent on the Mets for them to continue like this thru the season. Besides they're in first place so  somebody is winning those games.

**First of a three game series NY vs Houston last night, won by the Yanks 7-3. As expected, the NY crowd was very vocal in their harsh treatment of the Astros because of their cheating methods in the 2019 playoffs. Leave it to the NY crowd to come up with some ingenious ways to insult the Astros. Before we become too impressed, I read that the vendors outside the stadium came up with most of them, including some that were very profane. Not that the Astros didn't deserve it.The Yankee broadcasters feel the major reason the fans are so upset with Houston is the fact that the players got away with the cheating. They basically received no punishment, no fines, no suspensions and not loss of the title.

***THEY SAID IT***

"Alabama wide receiver checks in at 6 foot 166 lbs. I'm not saying he's too skinny to withstand the pounding of the NFL, but he's the only player in the draft who uses a Cheerio as a hula hoop."  -- Mike Bianchi

"Thursday, as Yanks-Orioles went to the 10th, Kay had to issue his “Free baseball!” call. Clever stuff — once, perhaps."  -- Phil Mushnick

"LA Lakers owner Jeannie Buss made a list of her all-time important Lakers and not on this list is Jerry West. That’s like leaving Bugs Bunny off of a list of all-time important rabbits.  -- Bill Littlejohn

"In the first half of tomorrow's Husker spring game there will be no tackling & the teams will play a form of touch football. Then, at the end, everybody gets a participation trophy?" -- Brad Dickson

"SF Giants & Rockies rained out tonight in Denver. So this means only 14 scheduled innings for Giants pitchers at Coors Fields for tomorrow’s doubleheader. Wonder if any of those pitchers participated in a rain dance."  -- Janice Hough

"Diamondbacks pitcher Zac Gallen tossed a seven-inning one-hitter against the Braves in the opener and Madison Bumgarner tossed a no-no in the nightcap.In other words, they scheduled an MLB doubleheader and fastpitch softball broke out."  -- Dwight Perry

" Talent evaluation is the most difficult thing in sports. The distance between college and pro football is from Canton, China, to Canton, Ohio."  -- Nick Canepa

 "A recent survey said the U.S. city having the most sex per capita is Los Angeles, averaging 135 times a year. That drops to 12 times a year if you exclude the Lakers and Clippers."  -- RJ Currie

 "NBA box scores often include DNP — “did not play, coach’s decision.” Kyrie Irving has inspired a new entry, DFLP — didn’t feel like playing."  -- Phil Mushnick

"The owners of Stonehenge were seeking a general manager, one experienced in working with ancient artifacts. They asked permission to speak to Yankees GM Brian Cashman."  -- RJ Currie

Chad Picasner




Friday, April 30, 2021

HERE WE GO AGAIN

 **Part of the fun of baseball is second guessing the manager's decision. It's fun because you're always right. It's that hindsight thing. In my opinion, Aaron Boone made two bad decisions in the Yankee's game against the Orioles. (1) Following baseball's Rules Of  Engagement, he pinch hit Aaron Judge, a righty for Rougned Odor, a lefty, against a left-handed pitcher. He won't get fired by the front office for making that move, but he didn't win the battle either. Judge went down 1-2-3. Why take Odor out? He seems to be the only Yankee who has consistently come up with the big hit, regardless of who is pitching. Here's where you have to use your head and your eyes instead of your calculator. (2) In the 10th inning with a runner on 2nd base (Stupid rule!) and no outs, again tradition ruled as he has the batter try to bunt the runner to third. Okay I guess except when he had the hitter try with two strikes. Foul ball, the batter is out and a wasted at bat. It was Tyler Wade hitting. Let him swing away. Even if he makes any kind of out, at least you had a shot. It appears to me that Boone is managing just to save his job rather than trying to win a game. This is real baseball, not a Strat-OMatic board game. 

**Yankee pitcher Mike King got sent down again after being called up two days ago from his last 10-day stint at the Alternate Site, which is, I think,  really just the far end of the dugout. He's been extremely effective this year. Will you guys please leave him alone?

 **The umpires made a terrible call in the Milwaukee/Miami game on Wednesday, costing the Brewers a run. The surprising thing is that Angel Hernandez was NOT involved. The umps also made an arbitrary call in the Oriole/Yankee game Monday night and Angel Hernandez was not involved in that one either. What's going on here, is Angel on sabbatical or something?

**I read that the NFL is instituting new rules to try to limit taunting this year. It will include among other acts, standing over an opponent after a play. While you're at it, why not disallow those staged touchdown celebrations, which get crazier every year. It can be easy to stop them: If a flag is thrown for this infraction, disallow the touchdown. That will shut them right down.

**I like baseball. No, I love baseball. We've been to Major League stadiums all over the country just to watch baseball regardless of who is playing. We think of ourselves as baseball fans who happen to root for the Yankees; because it's all about the game. Not Exit Velo (not a word, by the way), not Spin Rate, or Control vs Command. Just because they claim they can measure spin rate, does not mean we have to hear about it. Along with a batters statistics (batting average, home runs, etc), broadcasters now tell you the recent trends for a hitter, such as, "He's 2 for his last 28." This, at least is helpful. It tells you who is slumping and who isn't. A batter who is hitting .320 overall, currently isn't a .300 hitter if he's mired in a 2 for 28 slump.

A word about Exit Velo. Last night, Michael Kay and David Cone on the YES broadcast, tried to justify the need for Exit Velo. "It's important because the harder a ball is hit, the more likely it will result in a base hit." Probably true but it's information after the fact. A batter hits a ball hard for a double, does it really matter if its velocity is 101 miles per hour or 115? Throw in Launch Angle and projected distance and you're taking all the joy out of home runs. By the way, that distance traveled that they come up with is hogwash. Based on where the ball lands and the distance signs on the fences, their numbers make very little sense. So please let us just watch the game. If you have to know all those numbers, go have a beer with David Cone after the game.

***THEY SAID IT***

"The epidemic continues. Sunday, the Dodgers were up on the Padres, 6-1, after six. Dustin May looked strong, allowing two hits, only one walk and striking out 10. But to the delight of the Padres, Dave Roberts pulled him. Three of the next four Dodgers relievers were bombed. In 11, the Dodgers lost, 7-6."  -- Phil Mushnick  [I guess I'm not alone - CP]

"The Pay-Per-View for Wrestlemania 37 would have been much greater is they had taken my advice and arranged for somebody to body slam Tom Brady."  --  Greg Cote

"Tokyo's annual Naki Sumo rite of passage recently ended where parents bring their young to see wrestlers perform in ways that make the tots wail or cry. The American version is taking your kid to a NY Jets game."  -- RJ Currie

"Rockets guard Kevin Porter Jr. will miss a few games after violating the NBA’s health safety protocols by visiting a Miami strip club. Any possible fines, we assume, will be paid in $1 bills."  -- Dwight Perry

"Ralph Lauren designed the outfits for U.S. Olympians. I can’t tell if he’s dressed the U.S. team for the next space-shuttle mission or an expedition to the South Pole."  -- Pattti Dawn Swansson

"A “report” in the Babylon Bee headlined, “Entire U.S. Water Polo Team Drowns Kneeling for the National Anthem."  -- Sent in by Bill Hoyt

"A Wall Street Journal report said psychologists can consistently pick the loser of a fight by seeing who has the biggest, toothiest smile before they square off. Good luck trying this predictor on NHL players."  -- RJ Currie

"So we’re FINALLY about to be done with months of post-season NFL Draft hype. And now we’re about to be in for months of pre-season NFL Draft analysis."  -- Janice Hough

"Now that MLB seven-inning doubleheader games are here to stay, it’s time to get accustomed to the fifth-inning stretch."  -- Bob Molinaro

" Yesterday evening on the radio Bill Moos said he thinks the Nebraska football team can win nine games next season. Two words come to mind: "Happy Hour."  -- Brad Dickson

"Given that games now regularly include 80 or more 3-point tries — 88 in Tuesday’s Nets-Raptors — I conclude that NBA stands for “Not Basketball Anymore.”  -- Tim Mattice

"CDC guidelines now say you can be outside without a mask if you’re not in a crowd. So Marlins fans should be fine."  -- Janice Hough

Chad Picasner


Wednesday, April 21, 2021

GIMME THAT OLD TIME RELIGION...

 **Anyone who is at all interested in baseball should read Phil Mushnick's column in the April 17th edition of the NY Post. Baseball players and managers should be made to memorize it.

 https://nypost.com/2021/04/17/true-winning-baseball-goes-against-everything-mlb-practices/

Among the many current baseball practices he discusses are these little gems

*You wanna play the shift against us? Knock yourselves out. We have been drilled to beat the shift with ‘other way’ swings.

*Hustle? We will not be out-hustled. If a guy jogs when he should be running, if he home-plate-poses a double or triple into a single, he will immediately be pulled. 

*Our designated hitter, especially with two strikes, will be tasked with putting the ball in play, not striking out trying to hit the ball 500 feet. 

He discusses these items and more in detail and with a sarcastic sense of humor that befits the topic. I'd like to meet him someday and buy a beer...or 5 or 6. Lord knows he deserves it.

**It's interesting that in the last two days (Monday & Tuesday), I've read that two teams known for power hitting aren't hitting for two different reasons. The Cubs can't hit fastballs and the Yankees can't hit breaking balls. Maybe they should switch leagues.

**I haven't heard that Angel Hernandez has blown any calls lately. It can't be because he hasn't missed any, Maybe everyone is so used to it that it's not news anymore.

**MLB is is investigating baseballs thrown by Trevor Bauer to see if they have been doctored, First of all, why just Trevor Bauer? If he can do it, why not others? Secondly, they should keep in mind that they never really caught Gaylord Perry.

**Syracuse Coach Jim Boeheim is adding a second son, Former Cornell player Jimmy Boeheim to the team. I'm trying to confirm the rumor that his wife Julie is joining the cheerleading squad. 

**North Texas softball pitcher Hope Trautwein faced the minimum 21 batters against Arkansas Pine-Bluff on April 11 — and struck out all 21, a first in NCAA Division I history. That's better than a game I saw back in the 60's when a pitcher (Richie Pelow) for Oswego High, my high school team, threw a no-hitter against our cross town rivals, Oswego Catholic. The first batter flew out to center field, the last twenty struck out.

**Uh-oh. Brian Cashman has given Yankee manager Aaron Boone a vote of confidence over the teams recent struggles. Isn't that what they normally do before firing a manager? 

I just read an article by Ben Lindbergh about the surprising long-term friendship between Brian Cashman and Billy Bean. It stems from their shared belief in the sabermetrics put forth by Bill James, but they practice it from different angles. Interesting article - "Moneyball with Money" by Lindbergh

***THEY SAID IT***

"Friend just told me a great story about someone saying of COVID-19 vaccine “I won’t put anything in my body where I don’t know what’s in it.” And they got the response “You eat hot dogs don’t you?”  -- Janice Hough 

 "MLB hired former WWE "sizzle planner" Brian Stedman for league strategy and development. Soon, instead of a manager sitting a pitcher down, he'll come out and hit him with a chair"  -- RJ Currie.

"President Biden says he will not throw out the first pitch at the Washington Nationals home opener. So it you want to see a 79 year old pitcher, you'll have to watch the Baltimore Orioles."  Brad Dickson

"A fan in Anaheim threw an inflatable trash can onto the field during an Astros-Angels game.Three players on the Houston bench immediately yelled, “Pitch-out!”  -- Dwight Perry

"The good news is I picked the Bulldogs and the Bears in my finals. The bad news is that it was Georgia and Cal."  -- Alex Kaseberg

 "After Thursday’s MLB games, the first-place teams in the American League today are the Boston Red Sox, Kansas City Royals and Seattle Mariners, just like everyone thought it would be. -- Jeff Passan

"World champion boxer Floyd Mayweather fought Connor McGregor, a guy who had never been in a boxing match in his life.  I am surprised that it was not arranged for the winner here to face 65-year-old Hulk Hogan in a Steel Cage Texas Chain Saw Death Match."  -- Jack Finarelli

"If basketball players were confections, I'm thinking Kevin Durant would be brittle."  -- RJ Currie

"I'm not looking forward to Zach Wilson’s possible NFL-draft destiny. The Jets are to quarterbacks what Larry King was to marriage."  -- Doug Robinson 

"When Marc Leishman suddenly was one back in the Masters, we were told he was playing “under the radar.” Whose radar? That was another way of saying that CBS hadn’t much bothered to pay him much attention."  -- Phil Mushnick 

Chad Picasner 








 

 

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