Sunday, February 24, 2013


## Before the Syracuse Orange had their hats handed to them by Georgetown, the Athletic Department retired Carmelo Anthony's #15.  Now, my initial thought was, "Great player, but he only lasted one year. What the heck?"  Then it became clear: Anthony gave the University a gift of $3 million towards a basketball center. Carmelo has often said how much he enjoyed being at Syracuse, but it was only for the one year. You have to wonder is this was some kind of negotiated deal or just a couple of  'happy accidents.'  A spy in one of the novels I read, once commented, "You'll live a lot longer if you don't believe in coincidences."
I guess the answer to the question is $3 million.

## Speaking of the Syracuse-Georgetown game, the Hoya's Otto Porter, Jr. probably had the game of his collegiate career, grabbing 8 rebounds, getting 5 steals and lighting up the Orange defense with 33 points. Considering Syracuse only scored 46 points the whole game, imagine a pre-game talk where a player says, "Just give me 7 baskets guys and I'll do the rest."

So another great rivalry comes to am end, all in the interest of collegiate sports needing to find a way to collect more money.

There are questions, of course. How well will he perform at his age and coming off a serious injury? Is this his last year? Even if he's downright ordinary this year, and by ordinary, I mean maybe 35 saves and an ERA of 2.20. Who could find fault with that? But look at the legacy he has laid out for future closers. He already has 608 saves. Trevor Hoffman ended up with 601, but no one else is even close. As an example, Jonathon Papelbon has 257 saves and averages 37 per year. At that rate, he needs to pitch 10 more years to surpass Mariano. He would be 42 years old.
On the list of career saves leaders, only John Franco (21)pitched for more years than Mariano's 18. Franco ended up with 424 saves.
In the post-season, against the best teams in baseball, Rivera's record is unbelievable.  8-1 W-L record, 42 saves, only 86 hits and 21 walks in 141 innings. All he throws is a cut fastball and no one has figured out how to hit it in 18 years.

Wallace Matthews says the Kevin Youkilis is fitting right in. In two at bats, so far this spring, he has stranded five runners.

"So now that 2013 Spring Training has started, how long until Cubs fans break out their “Wait until 2014″ t-shirts?"  -- Janice Hough
"Hundreds of international soccer matches, including some in the World Cup, were fixed by organized crime gangs, an 18-month probe revealed. Not sure of the fixers' modus operandi, but we probably can rule out point-shaving."  -- Dwight Perry
" The Omaha Boat Sports and Travel Show features a shark exhibition. What better way to get people interested in taking up boating."  -- Brad Dickson
"Some Daytona 500 prediction:  
There will be at least 5,000 fans named 'Earl' attending the race.
Somebody in the infield will lose a tooth trying to open a bottle of beer."
 -- Mike Bianchi
"Bulls star Joakim Noah is 0 for 7 in career three-pointers. Anyone surprised a guy named Noah prefers his points two by two?"  -- RJ Currie
"Michael Jordan turned 50. Now when you see his tongue protruding, it's because his teeth just fell out."  -- Brad Dickson
"Looking at the cover of this week’s Sports Illustrated — Bryce Harper in his Washington Nationals uniform — moved a neighborhood woman to remark, “I didn’t know Wegmans had a baseball team.”  -- From Phil Mushnik's column.
"Seth McFarlane will be hosting the Oscars this weekend. What? Homer Simpson isn’t available?"  -- TC Chong


Friday, February 22, 2013


...but I'll find something to write about.

Giancarlo Stanton, Miami Marlinswas beaned taking batting practice by top prospect Jose Fernandez. Stanton says he's okay and commented, "It should only happen to Jeffrey Loria."

Eduardo Nunez was hit in batting practice by Joba Chamberlain. Chamberlain said he was sorry, he mistook Nunez for Kevin Youkilis.

Seven Catholic schools have left The Big East to form their own basketball conference. They are DePaul, Georgetown, Marquette, Providence, Seton Hall, St John's and Villanova. I believe they need one more team. I suggest they approach Notre Dame to join. Then they could call it the All Saints Conference and all they'd need is a commissioner. How about Pope Benedict? I'll bet he could use a part time job.

## Speaking of All Saints, Bobby Valentine has been named Athletic Director of Sacred Hearts University in Fairfield Connecticut. He probably doesn't have to worry about beer, but I wonder if they serve fried chicken in the cafeteria?

## The Yankees are experimenting with shifting Granderson to left field and moving Gardner to center. I think they would have tried this last season if Gardner hadn't gotten hurt and missed all but 16 games. I was glad to hear Girardi's comments on the switch. Girardi said his decision was not based on such stats as UZR, FSR or TZL as much as what his own eyes tell him. "For me, it's visual perception and what I thought might help us," he said. I still have only marginal confidence in these "contrived" stats such as UZR or WAR. Their basis always begins with some kind of assumption and builds off of that. My Logic Class professor in college would have laughed himself silly over any attempted proof of those stats.

## Diasuke Matsuzaka, one-time heavily sought after pitching prospect, has completed his original contract with the Red Sox, and was a free agent this winter. After producing only 50 wins in six years with Boston, no team seemed particularly excited about signing him and he ended up signing a minor league deal with the Cleveland Indians, where he'll have to deal with former manager Terry Francona again. Is this good or bad? For Terry or Dice-K?

## MLBPA union head, Michael Weiner (interesting last name) has warned the media against jumping to any conclusions about reports from the Miami clinic accused of distributing PEDs.  He also discussed the fact that drug testing will take place during the season this year, however, he did stress that there were restrictions in place. For example, no blood will be drawn BEFORE games, only after. Players are also excused for health-related issues and, I love this one, WEATHER/HEAT related situations. Let me understand this: if it's hot out, you can use PEDs? Oh yeah, this makes Weiner's next statement all the more interesting. "Players understand it's important to have the strongest program possible."  I think I really like his last name, now.

## It's make-or-break time for the 8th ranked Syracuse basketball team.  Their next three games are against #11 Georgetown, #17 Marquette and #10 Louisville. We'll know an awful lot more about the fortitude of this team in a week.

"The minor-league Omaha Storm Chasers' ballpark will boast an added accoutrement this season — an 8-foot statue of hard-nosed Cardinals pitching great Bob Gibson. Poetic justice? Local pigeons are already hatching plans to come in high and tight."  -- Dwight Perry
"The next pope could be the cardinal from Boston: "If he gets the job, he'll be the first pope to make you kiss his 2007 World Series ring."  -- Conan O'Brien
"Dallas owner Jerry Jones motored into Indianapolis for the NFL Scouting Combine in style — aboard a new $2 million luxury bus. Reflecting the Cowboys' recent fortunes, it stalls on most drives."  -- Dwight Perry
"The International Olympic Committee has decided to eliminate wrestling from the 2020 Olympic Games. When you look at the sports they're keeping, I'm pretty sure the “I” in IOC is for “Idiot.”  -- Brad Dickson
" The NFL apparently wants to move their  combine, the start of free agency, and the draft, to early March, April and May respectively. This so the league has one “big event” each month during the offseason. Well, other than arrests."  -- Janice Hough
"Can you just imagine the wall-to-wall coverage by NBC if Tiger travels to Sochi, Russia, next year to cheer Vonn on in the Winter Olympics? ESPN would have to start a new channel just to cover that."  -- Houston Mitchell
"Sports Illustrated says Kate Upton is their first back-to-back cover model since 1997. Shouldn't that be front-to-front?"  -- RJ Currie
"The Shrine Circus is in town. As if that Friday commute isn't going to be strange enough, now we're going to see a car pull up and 18 clowns climb out."  -- Brad Dickson
"I hate admitting that I’m going though football withdrawal, but I’m planning to watch “The Blind Side” in frame by frame mode to tie up my entire Sunday."  -- TC Chong


Sunday, February 17, 2013


You'll have to excuse my absence. Our retirement life is so full, my wife and I don't always get around to everything. Last week, she had ONE phone call to make -- and didn't do it. That means she has to make TWO calls this week. She'll be in complete bed rest until Wednesday. I have to get a haircut on Wednesday and I'll be checking into a rehab facility later.

## Ryan Braun is in the news again. They've found his name on another list from the Miami clinic. This one says he owes money. Braun says he stands on his previous denial and that he intends to fully cooperate with any investigation -- unless they ask him questions about it.

## The Yankees, who plan to use the 2nd and 4th oldest starting pitchers this season, are looking for a little more depth. Specifically, former Yankee, Chin Ming Wang, just to prove they're not relying on age. They're relying on rehab cases, too.

## Francisco Cervelli says he will not be playing in the WBC tournament this year. Maybe he heard the drug testing was a little more stringent there.

## SF Giant, Pablo Sandoval, always claimed that his weight problem would never negatively affect his play and proved it last year playing at a weight level the club did not approve of. So after a World Series victory, Pablo "enjoyed" his off-season, and came him extremely overweight, so overweight, in fact, the Giants refuse to divulge the exact number. However, it seems they are checking with the Yankees to get the name of CC Sabathia's tailor.

## Derek Jeter is always in the news, because...well, he's Derek Jeter. But get ready for a real onslaught of Jeter-Talk this summer, and not just because of his age. He is poised to move very high up on a number of career lists in various categories, specifically, doubles, runs, stolen bases and, of course, hits. He will also become only the ninth player in history to accumulate over 11,000 at-bats.
Unfortunately, they don't keep records on the number of starlets dated, because he's probably pretty high up on that list, too

Michael Jordan celebrates his 50th birthday. there have been a lot of obvious comparisons between MJ and LeBron James. Michael says Kobe Bryant is better than LeBron because Kobe has five championships and LeBron has only one. LeBron's answer: MJ has six rings, Bill Russell has eleven. Is Russell better than Jordan?  Ver-r-r-y Interesting!

Speaking of trash talk, my "quick wit" got me in a real jam this morning while shopping. Toward the end, I asked my wife if we were done. She said, "No, I have to go to the Health and Beauty isle." I said, "Okay, I'll get another cart."         Don't ever do this.

"Bears quarterback Jay Cutler reportedly mailed the engagement diamond to fiancĂ©e Krisitin Cavellari. Probably just as well; Jay's unfamiliar with delivering rings."  -- RJ Currie
"Apparently NFL commissioner Roger Goodell earned $29.49 million in 2011. No wonder the league needs to levy all those fines."  -- Janice Hough
"Yankees GM Brian Cashman has been ordered to pay more than $1 million a year in alimony and child support. Even worse, he's still stuck with full custody of A-Rod."  -- Dwight Perry
"A 150-foot asteroid passed within 17,000 miles of Earth last week. Or to hear Bob Uecker call it, just a bit outside."  -- Dwight Perry
"ESPNU devoted 10 hours to college signing day coverage. I’d make fun of this, except that I work for a newspaper whose signing day sports section was three-quarters the length of this year’s Farmer’s Almanac."  -- Brad Dickson
"Wrestling is being dropped from the 2020 Olympics. Oh no, now NBC is going to have an extra 1.7 seconds of Olympic air time to fill."  -- Brad Dickson
"Police in a town in England are on the lookout for thieves that made off with a stash of right-footed women's shoes. I don't see the big deal. I've always had two left feet."  -- Cam Hutchinson
" Wrestling is going to be dropped as an Olympic sport. Rumors have started that Vince McMahon has started campaigning to be the next IOC President."  -- TC Chong



Sunday, February 10, 2013


##  Boston Red Sox prospect, Bryce Brentz, accidentally shot himself in the leg a couple of weeks ago. This is nothing new to the Red Sox, since former manager Bobby Valentine shot himself in the foot many times last season.

## Curt Schilling now claims that an unnamed member of the Red Sox organization suggested that he use some form of PEDs to help him over an injury. Schilling said he refused and the Red Sox claim it never happened. Between this and the "bloody sock," you never know what Schilling is going to claim.
By the way, the "sock" is for sale, even though it currently resides in the Hall of Fame...or one version of it, anyway.

## Milwaukee manager. Ron Roenicke, says Brewer slugger Ryan Braun is "doing good," after allegations surfaced linking him to the Miami clinic that supposedly dispensed PEDs to many athletes. It's a shame he has to put up with all these accusations year after year. How many "smoking guns" does he have to dispel before they leave him alone? His latest denial:
 "During the course of preparing for my successful appeal last year, my attorneys, who were previously familiar with Tony Bosch, used him as a consultant," Braun said in his statement. "More specifically, he answered questions about T/E ratio and possibilities of tampering with samples."
Which begs the question, why would you use someone like Bosch, who is NOT an accredited doctor or supplement chemist, as an expert in a drug case? And why wasn't his name made public last year, when Braun was fighting his positive drug test?  Right, just deny, deny, deny.
As did, A-Rod, Melky Cabrera, Gio Gonzales, Nelson Cruz........

## Hiroki Kuroda is celebrating his birthday today. In keeping with recent Yankee policy, there will be no candles on his cake as their insurance policy prohibits him from being that close to a major fire.

## There are a number of sports broadcasters and writers who dislike the "Stormin' The Court" event at college basketball games, after the home upsets a highly ranked opponent. I see nothing wrong with it. I actually enjoy the fact that students are so into backing their athletic teams. The razzing that goes on in a number of college arenas is often inventive and funny, but sometimes they do go too far. Duke's 'Cameron Crazies' are among the best, but sometimes...
" Our Sports Culture At Work, Play: N.C. State guard Tyler Lewis’ grandmother had died six days earlier, so Thursday, as he shot free throws in the second half with Duke up 18 at home, some students were heard chanting, “How’s your grandma?”  (From Phil Mushnick's column)
You would hope that colleges would be teaching something about civility sportsmanship.

"The Boston Red Sox and MLB apparently are saying that Curt Schilling’s claim that someone on the Red Sox medical staff suggested he take PED’s in 2008 is “completely baseless.” Translation: Nobody put anything in writing."  --  Janice Hough
"To prepare for the 2014 World Cup, Brazilian cities are asking for volunteer teachers to help call girls learn English. In a related story, I have an education degree."  -- RJ Currie
"Tim Lincecum, the Giants' long-haired hurler, finally got his trademark locks sheared off. In other words, he came up with a good cutter during the offseason"  -- Dwight Perry
"After she plunked a spectator with an errant shot during the Pebble Beach Pro-Am: "I know how to do diplomacy; I'm not so sure about the golf course."  -- Condoleezza Rice
"Love Beyonce. She's talented and beautiful, but her performance at the Super Bowl wasn't a halftime show; it was an aerobics class."  -- Mike Bianchi
"This Super Bowl was a little different. Instead of miking up a player, a microphone was placed on Beyonce to see if she was actually singing."  -- Brad Dickson
"Forbes has released its list of most unpopular athletes. The top three are Lance Armstrong, Manti Te’o and Tiger.  All three were amazed as they said they’ve never worn Pinstripes.  --  TC Chong



Friday, February 08, 2013


The Mariners just signed him to an extension which guarantees him $25 million a year for the next 7 years.  General Manager Jack Zduriencik has consistently refused to listen to trade offers for Hernandez for the last 4 years, and this deal seems to sew up the popular righthander through 2019.  Not all GMs are completely sure of that. Brian Cashman has reportedly said, "$175 million? You think that scares us?"

It probably should if Hal Steinbrenner means what he says about reducing the payroll. Signing Hernandez might leave the Yanks with money for only two infielders and one outfielder behind him. They may call him the "King," but he's not  The King & His Court, Eddie Feigner.


Wednesday, February 06, 2013


## I had to live through 8 1/2 hours of Superbowl Pregame shows, but this is ridiculous. A 6 1/2 hour show for National Signing Day?  This is when high school football players (I almost lost my head and said "students") sign letters of intent for the college they want to play football for. Notice, I didn't say attend, because I'll bet most of them never see the inside of a classroom. I'll bet most of them can't even spell classroom.

Who cares? Well, let's see. There's Athletic Directors, coaches, players, some very rich alumnae and agents. Shhhh! The NCAA isn't supposed to know about the agents. They're treating this like the pro football draft. At least with the draft, the money is visible.  They'll be a lot of parties at the SEC schools tonight.

Isn't college and pro basketball enough? It's not like we're going to forget  that Alabama has a football team. Are there so many people working at ESPN that they can't keep them all busy without inventing these events? What's next? A 5 hour show documenting ESPN's search for a new janitor?  I probably shouldn't be giving them ideas.

## The Internet is still talking about the 35 minute blackout at the Super Bowl. Not everybody was upset about the blackout, though. As Charlie Sheen says, "It's a nice break in the day isn't it?"

## Jason Stark has rated the 6 divisions of Major League Baseball. No surprises here. The Al East is the strongest, the Al Central is the weakest. The NL East did have a lot of support from analysts and GMs.

## Two more names have surfaced from the Miami connection. Ryan Braun - where have we heard that name before? - and Francisco Cervelli. Cervelli? If last season was all he could produce while on the deer antler spray, then either the player or the spray is not what it's cracked up to be.
News flash: Jesus Montero has also been named. Boy, this deer antler stuff has got to be the bottom of the PED barrel.

"Police were called to a Toronto-area hotel after eight figure skaters from the Canadian championships got into a fight. It was so bad, two combatants were going at it toe-loop-to-toe-loop."  -- RJ Currie
"The Super Bowl added $430 million to the New Orleans economy. Apparently none of which was used to pay the electric bill."  -- Jimmy Fallon
"The New York Mets’ owners want to open a Vegas-style casino next to Citi Field. What? Hoping to see a good game after buying high-priced Mets tickets isn’t enough of a gamble?."  -- Janice Hough
" Three of the nation's most respected prognosticators -- Princess the Popcorn Park (N.J.) Zoo camel, Chaco the Virginia Zoo armadillo, and Eli the Hogle (Utah) Zoo ape -- all say the Ravens will win Super Bowl XLVII. What, you were expecting Terry, Howie and Jimmy?  -- Dwight Perry
"NFL Commish GODdell wants to reduce injuries by introducing two drastic changes. First, the kickoff play will be abolished. Secondly, all players will be required to strap pillows to their butts."  --  TC Chong
"The U.S. Postal Service announced that, starting in August, there will be no Saturday delivery. It doesn't take effect till August because it has to notify all the post offices by mail."  -- Brad Dickson


Monday, February 04, 2013


The Superbowl is over and we can all go back to leading our somewhat normal lives, now that the big game is done. Actually, it stopped being a "game" many years ago, when the TV execs. realized how much money could be made selling ads. And so it went from being a game to becoming a media event. Hype, hype and more hype. Getting up close and personal with the players, the owners, former players, the coaches and even the parents of the coaches. The sportswriters will even dredge up events from years ago in search of something to write about. Allowing for the occasional aberration, the games are usually boring and not up to the ballyhoo that we're subject to for two weeks.

It used to be fun.

Back in the 50's and 60's, football, especially professional football, was a gamblers sport. I'm not talking about the gamblers that are depicted in the movies or on TV, I'm talking about the neighborhood gamblers and bettors. It was more fun to win an argument than the money, because the money was gone in a week, but the kidding went on forever.

There was one saloon in my hometown where my Dad, my Uncles, cousins and a few friends would gather on Sunday morning to place their bets, but more importantly, to harangue one another over their opinions and drink their Sambuca, coffee royale and of course, beer. Not a lot of beer, because it was 5 degrees below zero outside and, according to my mother, "Beer isn't really drinking."

I would sit at the end of the bar, an 18-year old kid invited into the fraternity, look down the bar and see parlays, money and shot glasses spread out all over. There was never a lot of money, bets of $1, $2 and sometimes $10 were the norm. Then there were the gambling phrases: "Put this on a round robin, Tink."  or "I like that team, I'm gonna flat that one. Gimme 6-5 on Oakland with the spread."  And Tink, the rotund little barkeep and owner would waddle down the bar, pick up a parlay and say, "You're an idiot, I should book this one myself."

Yes, the insults would flow, but none of it was serious. It was just friends having a good time. Once, a patrolman on his beat walked past the front window, looked in and went to the door and knocked. They let him in and I was panicking, sure that I was about to be arrested. Instead, he stood at the bar, pushed the parlays and money aside and drank the shot that Tink gave him. "See you later," he said, and went back on patrol.

The nicknames were just as much fun. I already mentioned Tink. There was his brother Zinc-eye, along with Dog Malone, Midgie, Tootsie and Moon-eye. There was my uncle Curly, also known as Windy, my Dad, Joe Fab (also known as Pierre-y, for no logical reason.), even the cop on the beat, Joe Paeno, was known as "Yo-Rinnie." I was called "Student," a name which my professors disputed.

Yes, a simple party by today's standards. Just a little booze, some cigars, a little money and a lot of kidding. No food, no drugs and no women.

Just good times.

"Super Bowl XLVII is over. The Super Bowl XLVIII pregame show starts tomorrow."  -- Janice Hough
"Any bets Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis has been using a spray made from deer antlers? I'd say it's worth a few bucks."  -- RJ Currie

"By the way, I tried some of that deer-antler spray the other day."It didn't make me feel any better, but at night I got these uncontrollable urges to run out of the woods and dart in front of car."  Mike Bianchi
"The folks at Jell-O say they will hand out thousands of free cups of their colorful dessert Tuesday in the city of the losing Super Bowl team.Fans will get their choice of flavors — lime, orange or sour grape."  -- Dwight Perry
"During the fog-delayed Farmer's Insurance Open in San Diego, it was so foggy, Tiger Woods accidentally hit on his ex-wife."  -- Alex Kaseberg
"This year's 24 Hours of Daytona race features a Mazda that runs on biofuel made from chicken guts, pork lard and beef tallow. Or as NASCAR fans call that, Sunday dinner."  -- Jim Barach


Friday, February 01, 2013


## The sports pages are full of talk that the Yanks want to dump A-Rod. They may want to, but it's highly doubtful that they'll be able to. The Players Association will block any attempt to void A-Rod's contract, regardless of what MLB decides to do. MLB may suspend him for 50 games, maybe even 100, but that's probably the worst case scenario. It is possible that A-Rod's hip does not come around and he's forced to retire, in which case insurance will take on the major portion of his remaining $114 million dollars. That's probably all the Yanks could hope for.

## Brace yourselves. The Super Bowl is coming. The good news is that the pre-game show will start at 10:00 a.m. on Sunday, 8 1/2 hours before the game. The bad news is, they will televise the whole 8 1/2 hours.
What could they possibly say that they haven't covered at least three times already this week? About all that's left is putting the two Harbaugh parents in a mud pit and letting them wrestle for a couple of hours. Of course, put 100 professional athletes in front of a microphone for a couple hours all week, and someone will take a big bite out of their own foot.
Randy Moss claims he's the best receiver ever, even though the numbers prove otherwise. Chris Culliver has proven he's a homophobe and his "apology" wouldn't even make the waiting list for Oprah's confessional programs.

The actual game won't start until 6:30, in order to make sure that every human (& non-human) interest story has been aired. I'm sure the networks would like to start it later, but we'll be lucky if the game ends by 11:00 p.m.  Why such a late start? Phil Mushnick of the NY Post has the answer. Money! Is anyone surprised?
Mushnick says the late start has killed the Super Bowl Party. If the game started at 2:00, people could congregate in a tavern or a home, eat, drink, cheer and have a grand old time and still get home by 7:00 or 8:00, and be able to get to work on time the next day without that ringing headache that follows a good time. But no, the sponsors want you home, alone, in an easy chair, paying attention to those $3.8 million 30-second commercials for their products. They don't care who wins the game, what song Beyonce lip-synchs or who has a wardrobe malfunction at halftime. They would prefer that you know the names of all the Clydesdales by the end of the evening, especially if you have a Budweiser in one hand and a Taco Bell taco in the other.

I guess it's time for my prediction. I think GO Daddy.Com will have the sexiest commercial and Fed-Ex will have the best commercial.     ....Oh yeah, they'll probably squeeze in a football game.  ... if we're lucky.

"Yahoo! says JaMarcus Russell dropped 12 pounds and is nearer to making a comeback. In related news, I cut my hair and am closer to dating Anne Hathaway."  -- RJ Currie
"Beyonce is rehearsing the Super Bowl half time show by practicing lip syncing both her own and Madonna’s songs. Just in case a malfunction plays last year’s soundtrack.”  -- TC Chong
"The world's most famous circus is cutting jobs. Quick, raise your hands if you thought I meant the N.Y. Jets."  -- RJ Currie
"A Baltimore Ravens' cheerleader claims she is being barred from the game after she told the Ravens she's quitting after this season. There wasn't a dry eye in the room when she had to turn in the dental floss and two postage stamps that serve as her uniform."  -- Brad Dickson
"Actress Ashley Judd and three-time Indy 500 champ Dario Franchitti are separating after 11 years of marriage, and the divvy-up has already begun. As in he gets the cars, she gets the Kentucky basketball tickets."  -- Dwight Perry
"Rumor has it that the NY Yankees are looking at the latest PED allegations swirling around Alex Rodriguez as a way to void his contract. Of course, A-Rod could look at his recent history with the Yankees as evidence that his performance has clearly not been enhanced."  -- Janice Hough
"This Super Bowl will be a little different. Instead of miking up a player, a microphone will be placed on Beyonce to see if she's actually singing."  -- Brad Dickson