Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Per$onal & Confidential: The Real Cam Newton

Heisman Trophy votes are due by the end of next week. Between 5% and 10% of eligible voters have already submitted their ballots while many of the rest are still weighing the significance of the allegations involving Auburn University’s Cam Newton attempting to hold up Mississippi State for a $180,000 “signing Bonus”. I sat down with Cam this week looking for answers to just who this young man really is and I think you’ll find that his answers to Chad Picasner at Large’s probing questions reveal that he is just the kind of gentleman deserving of this award.

CPAL: Welcome, Cam. We are all aware of your outstanding play this year so let’s explore Cam Newton as a person.

CN: Thanks for having me and it’s important to me that my both my fans and distracters understand that neither I or my dad are the money grubbing sleaze balls portrayed in the vicious rumors reported by less responsible journalists than Chad Picasner at Large.

CPAL: Then lets get to it, Cam. When you were growing up did you watch a lot of television?

CN: Well, the Magic Toy $hop was my favorite show when I was little. For some reason that I can’t explain I just loved Mr. Green Jean$. And the Jolly Green Giant commercials for their Green Bean$ spoke to me like no others. Funny, huh?

CPAL: How about when you a little older.

CN: I really liked the Green Hornet. But I enjoyed other kinds of shows as well, like Green Acre$. My dad got kind of worried when he found out I liked that show so much so he made me watch reruns of John Wane Green Beret movie$, and I’m glad he did. They helped make me the man I am today.

CPAL: Are there schools you considered other than Mi$$i$$ippi $tate and Auburn coming out of junior college.

CN: Actually, growing up, I always dreamed of playing for the Green Wave of Tulane, but my grades were not strong enough coming out of high school, so I decided to attend a JC. After graduation and an NFL career, God willing, I intend to complete a Ma$ter$ in Bu$ine$$ Admini$tration at Tulane.

CPAL: Speaking of the NFL, do you have a wish list of teams you would like to play for?

CN: It’s my dream to be part of any NFL organization but if I could choose one team it would be the Jets.

CPAL: Why the Jets, Cam.

CN: You might think this is strange, but I just really like their colors.

CPAL: I’ve heard that you’ve become an old movie buff? Is that right?

CN: Oh, yeah. We have tons of time between practices and I’m a huge fan of movies from the 40’s.

CPAL: Really? What are some favorites?

CN: Well, “How Green Wa$ My Valley” is an all-time classic and I love “Casablanca” and anything else with $idney Green$treet.

CPAL: Will you share one secret about Cam Newton that no one knows?

CN: It’s a little embarrassing, but I play New York Lottery scratch-off games way too much. When I was in high school I really liked to play Loose Change but lately I like Win for Life.

CPAL: On a more serious note, Cam, why did you decide to break your commitment to Mi$$iSSippi $tate and attend Auburn?

CN: Honestly, my dad told me that sometimes the gra$$ really is greener on the other side of the fence.

CPAL: Last question, Cam. Why do you think some people who were close to you have leveled such serious “pay-me-to-play” accusations?

CN: I think they’re just green with envy.


This past Sunday, one of Picasner's favorites passed away at age 82. Gil McDougald was never a bright shining star on a Yankee team loaded with stars, players like Mantle, Berra, Skowron, Ford and Turley. He was simply the glue that held the Bombers infield together, averaging over 130 games a year for 10 years, 1951 - 1960. Though he was never a starter, he made a total of 6 all-star teams, being named in different years as a third baseman, a shortstop and a second baseman, showcasing his versatility. He was also the AL Rookie of the Year in 1951.

His statistics are not Hall Of Fame category, but solid nevertheless. He hit .276, averaged 11 home runs, 69 runs scored with an on-base pct. of .356 and a fielding average of .984. Definitely not outstanding, but interestingly enough, all higher than a certain 2nd baseman who IS in the Hall.

His defining moment may have been in the 1956 World Series during Larsen's perfecto, when he snared a ball that deflected off third baseman Andy Carey's glove and, being blessed with a magnificent arm, threw the runner out at first, keeping the perfect game intact.

Goodbye Gil, you will be remembered, at least by Picasner and the readers of this blog.



Monday, November 29, 2010

Derek is Dreamy

Oh. stop.

Picasner nows that Derek Jeter is my favorite Yankee.

Derek's Mom makes sure he keeps his nose clean and always has clean underwear. He controls a rabidly insane NY press, doesn't rape women, schills for the only automobile manufacturer that didn't require a taxpayer bail out, doesn't hang with A-Rod, and has a keen sense of humor that creates actual interest in the usually boring post-game interviews. Derek is The Bomb in The Bombers.

So he doesn't have much range in the field and might be a mediocre hitter in his "golden years". So what? George would know that he's worth more than a paltry $15 million as a marketing tool and that snide remarks from Hank and Cashman simply sully the Yankees image - and image is just as important to "the business" as winning ball games.

And I do miss George. There's no one left to spread lies about a player you want to humiliate, no one left to hire private eyes to dig up dirt on your players, no one left to humiliate Yankee legends, although Cashman is trying. In these negotiations the Yankee brass should stop and ask, "What would George do?"

Ahh, for the good old days.


They start this week. It's a wonder anything gets discussed with everybody running around starting ridiculous rumors. It's supposed to be a discussion of the state of MLB and any changes that might help, but mostly it's used for teams to find out what each team's goal is: what they're looking for, who they want to dump and who's paying who, how much. But mostly it's to remind Bud Selig that he has no influence.

Javier has signed a 1-year, $7 million, no-trade contract with the Florida Marlins. The no-trade clause is at the request of the other 29 teams.

Papa John's pizza has announced a new menu item to their line: a double-bacon, 6-cheese pizza for $11.00. Their marketing slogan is, "They're going fast." So are the people who are eating it.

Phil Rogers of the Baltimore Sun, has listed 8 teams who could be interested in Derek Jeter:
White Sox
It's 9, if you count the Batavia Muckdogs, who weren't too happy with their shortstop this year.
Jeter would fit in: he already runs like he's in the muck now.
Can we just quit this? Jeter isn't going anywhere but New York, and any speculation as to a new team is a waste of ink...and it's making Vod mad.


Sunday, November 28, 2010


There will be no "Jeterian" comments today.

They chose Mike Quade, their third base coach and interim manager last year. He received an endorsement from none other than previous Cubs manager, Lou Piniella, who felt Mike's best asset was his extensive minor league managing background. Lou's right: managing minor league teams is good experience for managing the Cubs. He'll never know the difference.

This is great news for Michael Kay, who has never pronounced his name the same way twice in a row.

"Not a lot of local pregame interest for the United Football League championship. Last week in Omaha, a random drawing for tickets was held. The winner received 16,000 tickets to the game."
"In the first-ever football game in the new Yankee Stadium, Notre Dame beat Army 27-3. Because it's Yankee Stadium, seven of Notre Dame's points came on home runs."

"Canadian crooner Michael Buble, co-owner of the Vancouver Giants hockey team, made headlines this week by saying he and his fiancee - Argentine actress and model Luisana Lopilato - will wed twice. One ceremony will be in her native land, the second in Vancouver. Is it just me, or does this sound like much I-do about nothing?"

Much I-do about nothing? Nothing? RJ, did you even LOOK at her picture?



Saturday, November 27, 2010


Jeter's agent, Casey Close, has stated that the 6yr/$25 million bid was completely untrue, but failed to offer 'correct' amounts. Okay, so now what? I like Rob Neyer's take on this. In case you aren't aware, Neyer is a writer for ESPN, and has no idea about baseball unless there is a number attached. He's the biggest sabre metric nerd on the ESPN site. In today's column, Rob says: 1) The Yanks & Jeter will agree to some compromise deal, 2) Jeter will accept the Yanks initial offer, 3) he will play for some other team for a lot less money. Now this is the way to predict the outcome of any negotiation: you pick BOTH sides and the middle. Way to go, Rob.

The talk is always about all the dollars the Yanks are going to throw at Cliff Lee, but there are three other teams who are at least talking about going big in the marketplace. Texas, who has always been in the game, the Angels, who are threatening to throw some money around, and now Detroit. They just put Victor Martinez in the fold, and with their pitching staff, this could be a dangerous team next year.

From David Thomas, Fort Worth Star-Telegram: "You know, you'd think that in a game involving Northwestern, someone would figure out well beforehand that there was a space problem with putting a football field inside Wrigley Field."

The Iron Bowl was played in Tuscaloosa, Alabama, yesterday, and it lived up to all expectations. Alabama took a 21-0 lead in the first quarter and led 24-0 at one time, before taking a 24-7 lead into the locker room at the half. Auburn never gave up, however, and pulled out a 28-27 win, in what may be the best college game of the year. All this before more than 101,000 fans.

I didn't see the game, but the Syracuse Orange basketball team squeezed out a 53-50 win over Michigan. SU's top recruit, Fab Melo, the 7-foot freshman center was pulled in the first half and never re-appeared, scoring 0 points and 0 rebounds. From what little I've seen, he looks over-matched. Luckily, Boeheim doesn't have a lot more hair to lose. We'll see if there's any improvement tonight.


Friday, November 26, 2010


We've heard for a while now, that the Yanks have offered Jeter 3 years and $45 million. We've heard nothing about Jeter's asking price, but the rumor was that they were $50 million apart. Well, don't believe everything you read, boys and girls. According to Bill Madden of the NY Daily News, Jeter and his agent, Casey Close, have started the bidding at 6 years, $150 million. If A-Rod was taking steroids, what in the world is Jeter on? I have to think this has to do with A-Rod's contract of 10 years and $275 million. A-Rod got his after a year of hitting 56 home runs and getting 156 RBIs. Jeter's year? Not so much. At $15 million a year, it's probably $5 million a year more that Derek could expect on the open market.

Jeter is often described as iconic, but there is that ever-present streak of pride and stubbornness that has surfaced big time. He now has three choices: 1) Accept the Yanks offer, 2) Sign for a lot less with some other team, or 3) Retire. He won't get $150 million even if A-Rod offers to kick in $50 million himself. Think that'll happen?

I'm not a big college football fan, but after driving thru the state of Alabama last week, it's hard not to develop some interest, especially after witnessing fans frothing at the mouth, either Crimson or Orange, depending on your loyalty. Think I'm exaggerating? Check this out:


Congratulations to Josh Hamilton and Joey Votto for getting the MVP awards. Whether you agree or not, at least they played on successful teams, falling in line with Picasner's belief that "Most Valuable" means you helped your team win. The Seattle Mariners lost 101 games and yet two players, Ichiro & King Felix, received MVP votes. How 'valuable' could they be? Yeah, the Mariners might have lost 125 games without those two. Does this make any sense?


Thursday, November 25, 2010


*********HAPPY THANKSGIVING*********
Again there isn't much new going on, so I'm making things up (not really).

It's been so long, no one even remembers how many years he's been at Penn State. At a recent press conference, he was asked if he was retiring after this year. He stumbled through an answer that sounded like no. He did say he thought they would have a better team this year, but he had hopes that next year would be better because he was working on a new offense: The Single Wing.

Never happen. Apparently, he's been accused of 'lending' money to potential clients from the Dominican Republic, in direct violation of MLB and The Players Association rules. Boras has countered by saying, "Everything we've done has been on the up and up." And he's right: it's been UP yours MLB and UP yours Player's Association.

I've mentioned the actors who have surprised us with their athletic abilities. Now, how about the ones who shouldn't be on the field.

Sylvester Stallone: Not too bad in the fight movies, but everything is choreographed and every movement is rehearsed. In "Victory," however, a soccer movie, he wasn't so good. I especially liked his celebration after stopping a goal: he jumped into the air. Well, let's call it jumping. His feet left the ground but his body went nowhere. But he does do a good stare-down.

Anthony Perkins: In "Fear Strikes Out," he plays Jimmy Piersall, a baseball player. He didn't do badly with the bat, but they never showed him in the field. His worse performance was in the movie "Tall Story" where he played a basketball player. They showed one sequence where he dribbled the ball in front of a defender, "faked him out," and scored. Pretty pathetic. I think Helen Keller could have guarded him successfully.

Fabian Forte: He also attempted to play a basketball player in the movie "High Time," with a 57 year-old Bing Crosby and a 17 year-old Tuesday Weld. Fabian looked like he thought the ball was diseased and his attempt at shooting the ball was downright laughable. I think Bing could have played better and while maybe Tuesday Weld would have been as inept, she would have looked sweet in the very brief uniforms of the day.
One other note, in the Movie "Ride The Wild Surf," Fabian, Peter Brown and Tab Hunter play surfers. While the movie was filmed in Hawaii, I think the surfing scenes were shot in Director Don Taylor's bathtub. Even with the fake backdrop and never showing their feet, all three of these guys looked petrified. Probably were afraid their careers were going to be 'wiped out.'

Gary Cooper: Ah, now we come to the epitome of ineptitude. Cooper played Yankee legend Lou Gehrig in the movie "Pride of the Yankees." I assure you that I am not making these things up. Cooper was right-handed while Gehrig was left-handed. Cooper was so inept at baseball, they filmed him hitting right-handed and then running to third. Then they reversed the film to make it appear that he was hitting left-handed. He still looked awkward. Not only did Cooper know nothing, and I mean nothing, about baseball, he had never even SEEN a game before filming the movie. Why use Cooper you ask? The story is that the bigwigs at Samuel Goldwyn didn't think Gehrig's name was big enough to draw viewers, so they used their biggest star - Gary Cooper. Probably the worst casting choice ever. Gehrig was noted for being taciturn and showing almost no emotion. At least Cooper got that part right.


Wednesday, November 24, 2010

All Stars All

You can't have a baseball team without an all-star GM and free agent, and while there are many worthy candidates for inclusion on the 2010 CPAL All-Stars, who can argue with the uber-dynamic, Negotiating With the Stars quality, I'm OK - You're OK, With Friends Like This Who Needs Enemies, dance of death duo of Brian Cashman and Derek Jeter?

Both Cashman and Jeter will come out of this with sullied reputations. (I mention Cashman first because, after all, he and Hank have been kind enough to reminds us that the Yankees have made many of their players "richer than their bosses", presumably Cashman). While a more sullied rep hardly seems possible in Cashman's case, his smarmy comment encouraging Jeter to test the free agent market to see if he can find a situation he likes better should demonstrate to any remaining Cashman fans (is that possible?) how highly he publicly regards a first ballot Hall of Fame legend. Oh, sorry, it's strictly business so it's OK to dis anyone and everyone.

Jeter comes off little better. While the boy wonder has said nothing controversial, his agent's public admission of bewilderment at the paltry ($45 million), short term (3 years) offer from the Yankees is, well, bewildering. Nothing comes out of Jeter's inner circle without Jeter's approval. If the agent says it, Jeter means it. So, the questions are, "What has Jete been smoking?" and "How's his short term memory?" Can you imagine anyone other than the Yankees making an offer even remotely similar?

Honestly, I'm bewildered by the Yankees offer of $15,000,000 a year for 3 years. If, as they say, it's strictly business and they're buying a player not a franchise, spending that kind of money on an aging, defensively below average, .260 hitter is truly bewildering.

The saving grace of the poor behavior of both parties to this Millionaire's Charade is that it's the most interesting thing happening, slimy as it is, in the off season. Who really cares about Gold Gloves (name any from last year), Cy Young's (name 3 from the last decade), MVPs (so irrelevant why name any), or a new Mets manager (hurry, before this one is replaced) .... Snork...zzzzzzzzzz.... Only the Yankees can give us daytime-soap-quality drama.

Anyway, Happy Thanksgiving to all of our faithful readers struggling to get by on a a meager $15M and best wishes for a better 2011 to their under paid bosses.


After a while, I get bored dealing with the "Silly Season," when we have to wade through all the crazy rumors, 90% of which, never turn out. So with nothing major to report or comment on, I decided to come up with an all-star baseball team, made up of characters in sports movies who showed at least some talent. I hoped to stay true to the various positions, but I wasn't totally successful. I also found that if I limited myself to men, I would have to compromise my criteria, so women will be included - and not for the purposes that Jimmy Dugan has, ..."to sleep with after the game." That being said, here's my team:

Catcher: Crash Davis (Kevin Costner, Bull Durham) Probably the best athlete of the bunch
1st Base: Dottie Hinson (Geena Davis, A League of Their Own) Had to put her somewhere
2nd Base: Marla Hooch (Megan Cavanagh, A League...) Ok no closeups, but she's a switch hitter
Shortstop: Ellen Sue Gotlander (Freddie Simpson, A League-) Man's name, but a woman's body
3rd Base: Roger Dorn (Corbin Bernson, Major League) No push-ups required, Roger
Left Field: Shoeless Joe (Ray Liotta, Field of Dreams) My weakest pick
Center Field: Willie Mays Hayes (Wesley Snipes, Major League) Perfect pick - he has a record
Right Field: Roy Hobbs (Robert Redford, The Natural) Not bad for a 48-year old man
Designated Hitter: Jimmy Dugan (Tom Hanks, A league...) If he's sober
Pitchers: Nuke Laloosh (Tim Robbins, Bull Durham) Garter belt and all
Kit Keller (Lori Petty, A League...) You gotta love that leg kick
Relief Pitcher: Ricky Vaughn (Charlie Sheen, Major League) Can you say Ryne Duren?

Subs: Jake Taylor (Tom Berenger, Major League) As long as we don't ask him to pinch-run
Mae Morabito (Madonna, A League...) What a clubhouse presence
Ty Cobb (Tommy Lee Jones, Cobb) Anybody wanna argue with him?

Manager: Lou Brown (James Gammon, Bull Durham) He's certainly got the voice for it
Coach: Larry Hockett (Robert Wuhl, Bull Durham) Leads the league in wedding gifts

Announcer: Harry Doyle (Bob Uecker, Major League) Could there be any other choice?

I'm sure we all have our favorites and I'll listen to suggestions.


Friday, November 19, 2010


I'm back from my travels in the deep south, where I learned you don't tell "redneck" jokes, unless you're Jeff Foxworthy. Since I seldom had a computer available in the motels, I was forced to make a few notes, so some of these events may be a little dated.

For Halloween, a Penn State fan decided to go to the Nittany Lion home game against Michigan, dressed as a Wolverine. Four Penn State fans promptly beat him up. Good thing Penn State won the game or this guy might still be hanging from the goal posts.

Probably the right thing, as the award is supposed to go to the BEST pitcher in the league. Sabathia had more wins but he wasn't as overpowering as Hernandez. Besides, Dwight Perry needs something to keep him interested in baseball.

Hockey player Brett Sutter of the Calgary Flames was in a bar fight recently that got him sent to jail. His dad, Darryl Sutter, who happens to be the Flames GM, promptly traded him to the Carolina Hurricanes. Jeez, my dad just sent me to my room.

Thrilled over Gardenhire being named Manager of the Year, Twins' centerfielder Denard Span, tweeted, "Congrats to the best manager in bestball." Moments later, he tweeted an apology for misspelling 'baseball.'

Like all sports, football has a language all it's own. Blitz, Cover 2, Rolling Pocket, the list grows every year with the meanings becoming more and more obscure. After watching this video, however, the term Quarterback Sneak will never again need explanation:


The latest reports indicate that the Yanks and Jeter are $50 million apart. If you think that's bad Derek, wait till you and Minka Kelly start discussing wedding rings.

One bit of news from our latest vacation. Being big fans of National Parks, we are familiar with the usual bear-proof trash receptacles that dot the Park grounds. Annie-O went to discard some of our trash, but couldn't figure out how to open the bin. Luckily, a bear happened by to show her how it worked.

The Connecticut Lady Huskies basketball team, won their first three games by an average of 60 points. Then against Baylor, the pre-season #1 pick, eked out a 65-64 win. Is college basketball's longest winning streak in danger?


Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Monday, November 15, 2010


Things are bleak here in Birmingham, Alabama. We've just driven thru a monsoon to get to our motel after spening a week on the Gulf of Mexico. Now I find there is no baseball news in the local papers, only football. And you must be ver-r-r-y careful about what you say. After driving thru Tuscaloosa last week and seeing "Roll 'Tide" everywhere I looked, I mentioned to Annie-O that I missed the "Roll 'Tide" signs. This remark got me a nasty are from a woman cashier who hissed at me, "Ya'll are in Auburn country now!" Yes, ma'am.

I heard someone on the ship mention that Jeter had been voted another gold glove. Can't be, I thought. I then checked the only really reliable source for sports news and there it was in black and white from Vod. I will say this: Jeter makes the play on everything he gets to. I won't say his range has decreased significantly, let's just say they don't have to re-drag the shortstop area in the fifth inning anymore.

Glad to hear that sports writers are starting to pay attention to ramblings of Chad Picasner. I suspect being sanctioned by no less a noted columnist than the "Great" Dwight Perry has had some effect. Picasner has also been quoted in the Yakima, Washington, paper, the home town of the above named Perry.

Limited time on the computer, so I have to sign off.


Sunday, November 14, 2010

It Must Be Love

Attila the Hun Wins Nobel Peace Prize

Donald Trump's Hair Returns to Home Planet

I’ve been trying to think of events more unlikely than Derek Jeter being awarded the Gold Glove for last year’s performance… and it’s hard to do. But, hey, if the veterans can put Bill Mazeroski in the Hall of Fame is it any more bizarre for the managers to put a Gold Glove on an aging Jete?

As the mountain of dirt grows higher around The Auburn Football Corporation, aka Auburn University, and one of its recent purchases, Cam Newton, isn’t it time for the NCAA to once again trot out Coach K(A$H) to reassure us that bags full of money have no negative effect on college sports or on the institutions that pass them around (under cover of boosters, of course)?

Did Brian Cashman realy sing “I’m Just an Okie from Manhattan” to Cliff Lee on his recent love visit to Arkansas?

And finally, the Picasner-I-Pick-U-Pick-We-All-Pick Sweepstakes question for the 2010 – 11 NCAA basketball season brought to you through the generosity of Kleenex Tissues and Roto-Rooter.

Question: How many times during the regular season will cameramen catch SU head coach Jim Boeheim exploring the deepest recesses of his prominent proboscis with a naked finger? Send your answer to Picasner-I-Pick-U-Pick-We-All-Pick Sweepstakes, Picasner Plaza, Snotsville, NY.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010


Truth is, indeed, stranger than fiction.

Derek Jeter has been awarded the 2010 Gold Glove for AL shortstops calling into question, for many, including more than a few die-hard Yankee fans, the relevancy of this designation. Apparently Annie has not only worked her charms on the CashWad but on the majority of AL managers as well.

Whether you agree with this decision or not, it is a fitting beginning to Derek’s farewell tour as the Yankee’s shortstop. It has been a remarkable journey deserving of first ballot Hall of Fame election when he’s eligible and a plaque equally large to the Steinbrenner Memorial Tombstone currently on display in the Stadium. Yet, we can all remain sure that he will be much happier with one consistent with those honoring the real Yankee greats and he should be counted among them.

Even stranger, another newspaper has succumbed to Chad Picasnerism. The Syracuse Post Standard has broken all of its journalistic standards and quoted our hero in its Wednesday, November 10 edition. It always amazes me that sportswriters actually get paid for the time they spend reading At Large. Might explain the current readership freefall in daily newspapers.

Saturday, November 06, 2010

Classified - Burn This Post after Reading

As you know, Picasner and Annie have claimed that they are taking a Caribbean cruise for the next several weeks. Now this ruse may fool those unfamiliar with our Hero and his lovely spouse, but I believe that the faithful reader (the singular form is intended for accuracy) of this column, nee diatribe, deserve to know the truth.

While our Favorite Couple will be in the Caribbean, the trip will be strictly business. While The P lounges on sun-kissed, white sand Jamaican beaches sipping umbrella adorned rum toddies, Annie will be conducting top-level, super-secret negotiations with Brian Cashman in an attempt to settle The Jeter Contract. Why Annie and why Jamaica you may ask.

As Picasner knows only to well, what Annie wants Annie gets. Very clever of the Jete to hire not only his biggest fan but also the woman who taught Idi Amin, Vladamir Putin, and Scott Boras everything they know about the importance of diplomacy, tact, and fair play in a successful negotiation.

If you have any doubts, for only three easy payments of $49.95 you can receive Annie’s best selling training video “Get People to do What You Want and Make Them Like It”. Picasner Products will also include “The Annie-O Getting Your own Way Can be Fun Tool Kit” featuring all of the necessary implements of “persuasion” that Annie herself uses to motivate our Hero to clean the garage, take out the trash, and generally accede to her every desire and whim. Annie-O persuaders include the “Put Your Thumbs in This While I Crank down the Screw”, “Annie-O’s This Will be Fun For Both of Us Leather Whip” useful for both immediate intimidation and late night fun, and the field tested “Dick Cheney Water Board” that helps you get anyone to admit to anything – whether they did it or not.

And why Jamaica? A fiendishly devised plot, indeed. Annie knows that slipping samples of locally grown Jamaican “produce” into salads and deserts will weaken the will of the usually stoic Cashman and, while less likely, may even elicit a smile from the puss of our stone-faced, humorless GM – and that’s certainly something we would all like to see.

Annie-O, we all wish you well on your journey and look forward to another year with a defensive liability at shortstop (she'll yell at me for this one) – or soon to be aged left fielder (can't argue with that). God’s speed.


Tuesday, November 02, 2010


No updates from here. We're on our way to Myrtle Beach for golf, beach time, golf, ride the motorcycles, and did I mention golf? Then down to Tampa for golf, Rib Fest, golf, Barney's Cycle Shop, and perhaps some golf.

I offer my sincere apologies to Picasner and to any readers that I have inadvertently mislead. I honestly thought that he had actually graduated from high school. My mistake.



15 weeks sounds a little better, but only a little. Of the Big Three major sports (I never watched much hockey), it seems that only in pro-basketball does one of the 2 or 3 "best" teams usually win. Because of the number of games played in the regular season and in the playoffs, you'd think that this would be true in baseball, too. But, it isn't. You can't really say that San Fran or Texas or Cincinnati don't belong in the playoffs, or deserve to win it all, because they're obviously good teams, but it seems to me that the answer is that there just isn't that much difference in the teams.
Think about this: Oakland finished 9 games back of Texas with a .500 record. Change any 10 losses to wins and we might have had west coast 'subway series'. That's 10 games out of 162. That's only 6%! And yet no one really considered the A's as contenders. Obviously there is a little more than just talent involved here and whatever it was, San Francisco had it.
Congratulations Giants!!

You'll never guess. Kevin Long, hitting coach of the Yanks has a new 3-year deal. Pretty important signing if you're a Yankee hitter. We're still a ways away from all the hoopla around some super-star names. After all, General Managers have to evaluate their current roster, sift through the available players, and, in the Yankee organization anyway, start printing more money.

"WHEN OWNERS ATTACK" It's a story about Texas owner Chuck Greenberg, calling Yankee fans, "...violent, apathetic and an embarrassment," for their behavior during the playoffs. Yes, that's the old "Evil Empire" rearing it's ugly head again. This happens in all the parks. Neyer relates some stories about obnoxious behavior in Kansas City. Kansas City, no less! The Yankee leadership will ignore this outburst, as well they should. Some one will have to explain to me how you can be violent AND apathetic at the same time. Greenberg should pay attention to his own team more and maybe he won't have to declare bankruptcy again.

I read that, as a stunt, Shaquille O'Neal posed as a statue in front of Harvard Square in Boston. He was there for about an hour and reports are that he was pretty effective. Of course this comes as no surprise to those of us who have watched him play in the NBA for the last couple of years.

From Dwight Perry:
"Have you seen Army's spiffy camouflage football uniforms, helmets and all? Referees suspect the Cadets might have too many men on the field, but say it's too tough to tell."
From RJ Curry:
"A lot of sports pundits think Cliff Lee will end up in New York next season pitching for the Yankees. After the recent ALCS, I'm thinking his wife won't want to come within spitting distance."

They're playing Kutztown University (stop laughing, I didn't make it up), student body population of 10,700. No truth to the rumor that their logo is a can of soup.

Annie-O and I are on our way out the door for a two week vacation, including a week-long cruise in the Caribbean. Vod will keep us updated as to all the important events while I'm gone, including updates on his class reunion.


2010 World Series Wrap-up

Giants in 5. Wow, that's pitching... and catching!


Monday, November 01, 2010

The Kiss of Death

Nolan, get a clue. George W. is the kiss of death. It took the Rangers 12 years to recover from Bush and you invite him to walk onto your field and throw out the first pitch? You know that baseball, more than any other sport, is driven by streaks and superstition and you had a guy who has screwed up everything he's touched... including the Rangers and the country - and you let him ceremonially start the game in your park? Are you nuts? Apparently you are.

The fact that Madison Bumgarner was spectacular and the Giants' defense rock solid also helped a bit. Thanks for delivering a fine game.

Welcome to November.

Only 22 more months to Picasner's 50th high school reunion.

I'll let you know how the preparations go.