Saturday, October 31, 2015

ESPN - A Home for EverySinglePompousNincompoop

ESPN and its parent company Disney have done more to bring the notion of “Lamestream Media” to fruition than a reality-challenged Sarah Palin and the professional liars at FoxNews(?) combined.

ESPN (EverySinglePompousNincompoop) has killed the distinctive sports and pop culture website, Grantland.

While promising to continue its support of innovative sports journalism after firing Grantland’s interesting and opinionated founder, Bill Simmons, ESPN doubled-down on its commitment to promoting the stupid, inane and pointless screechers Skip Bayless, Steven A. Smith, Curt Schilling and their ilk. 

Bob Silverman wrote, “Grantland is gone for good, subsumed by the needs of click-hungry advertisers, who tend to blanche at any take on the day’s events that might offend or would even tiptoe outside the box of standard-brand sports recap pabulum.”

“Not that I’m alleging that any sports commish leaned on ESPN and told it to shut this thing down, but this is what happens when you spend billions for the rights to broadcast the NFL, NBA, Major League Baseball, and the World Cup.”

“ESPN’s going to ride or die with Stick to Sports, a dismissive shorthand for anyone who might suggest a connection between the sports world and economics or politics or any social, racial or gender issues, that sports journalism is not just boxscores and harrumphing about Tom Brady’s “egacy.”

“But in ESPN’s mind, that’s the winning formula.”

“The rest of us have lost.”

Saturday, October 24, 2015

Could You Repeat That?



  • Louisville Head Coach Rick Pitino explaining why he will not attend the ACC Media Day and is sending two new transfers in his absence.

Slick suits, shiny shoes and a million dollar salary won’t buy you an ethical D1 college basketball coach. Given the histories of Boeheim, Brown, Calipari, Pitino and so many others, it guarantees quite the opposite.

Friday, October 23, 2015

Baseball Takes A Day Off... House Should Have, Too

Thinking about Benghazi…
The attack on the temporary U.S. mission and a nearby CIA annex Libya during the early morning hours of September 11, 2012 has fueled a political firestorm directed at then Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. In early 2016, a new action movie, 13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi, will only stoke the flames as a highly complex and nuanced, lethal geopolitical crisis will be explained by the team that gave you the "Transformers" films. What could possibly go wrong with that?
Meanwhile, GOP Senator Bob Inhofe claims that this relatively small terror attack in Eastern Libya is one of the greatest cover-ups in U.S. history. Really? Worse than Reagan and his minions hiding the sale of 120 I-Hawk surface-to-air missiles and 1,000 TOW anti-tank missiles to the Ayatollahs in Iran in exchange for hostages held by the terror group Hezbollah, then funneling the profits from that sale illegally to Nicaraguan contra guerillas behind Congress’s back? Some people need to read a book.
Former-Vice President Dick (I Got More Deferments Than You Chicken Hawk) Cheney overstated the significance of the attack as “One of Worst Incidents I Can Recall in My Career.” I guess he forgot about 9/11 (2,996 dead), the Iraq War (4,886 dead), the Afghan War (2,326 dead and counting), the Oklahoma City (168 dead) and Beirut Barracks (243 dead) bombings, and the Pan Am flight 103 bombing (270 dead). That’s almost 11,000 Americans killed… plus the four in Benghazi.
And after an 11-hour grilling of former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton by the House Select GOP Kangaroo Court, top Kangaroo Trey Gowdy could not offer one piece of new ‘evidence’ that was not available from the previous eleven inquiries. Good job, Trey!

Thursday, October 22, 2015

It was a great day for baseball in North America everybody...

The Blue Jays won Game 5 at home to extend the ALCS and The NY Mets closed out the Cubs in a 4-0 sweep.

The Joe Buck / Harold Reynolds Royals v. Jays broadcast was World Series quality, on point and professionally delivered, providing just the right mix of analysis and excitement, particularly over the last three innings. Great job.

After satirizing doily waving in a recent post, the scene inside the Toronto ball park pulled off towel twirling exquisitely. When the camera was pulled back the stands were a blizzard of North Country white.

In Chicago, the Mets scored four in the first and two in the second to put an early end to Cubs.

It’s a shame that a few Mets fans (actually, only my still-to-become-aware nephew and one or two of his Mets fanboy pals) aren’t interested in ‘Tradition’. Otherwise, Daniel Murphy’s record setting home run - Absolutely Amazing! - could become part of a Mets tradition that dates back to their 1969 World Series Championship team when they became truly “Amazin’ “, for all the right reasons.

Ernie Johnson, Ron Darling and Cal Ripken, Jr., please, don’t do another game together.

Sleep well my friends and stay thirsty (for men over 40, cranberry juice).

Played 18 today. That was also Amazin'. (I waved a golf towel after every shot.)

Sunday, October 18, 2015

And Now for Something Completely Different...

The following public service announcement is a reminder to my golfing buddies that golf is an outside activity and that fall golf in the Finger Lakes is some of the best and most interesting golf of the year.

While many of my locals were aging in front of the television watching another undisciplined Rex Ryan football team drop to 3 - 3, they missed a beautiful day on the course.

If you haven’t been playing when the first sun-snow shower comes down you have missed one of the most inspirational scenes a golf course can provide. 

I played twenty holes today under a spectacular Finger Lakes sky, never waited behind slow players, didn’t contend with divots left open by total boneheads, played holes in any sequence
and was never cold, chilly or the least bit uncomfortable.

Here’s a news flash:  Dress for the Occasion, Dress for Success, Clothes Make the Man or Woman and there is a plethora of tech clothing that is perfect for the cold weather outdoor enthusiast - breathable and warm without bulk. 

Start with a polyester base layer, top and bottom. Slip on lined wind pants and you’re half way there.

Add an L.L. Bean microfiber fleece (Item # 284602), top it off with a vest (Item# 284604) and you’re good to 40 degrees. 

Comfortable hands are absolutely necessary. Leave your golf gloves home and don’t bother with FootJoy cold weather gloves. Pick up a pair or two of 180’s (Style # 23613) for a great grip and great comfort. Wear both the left and right and you’ll find you’ll make better shots with softer hands.

Add whatever headwear you like. I prefer a traditional cap and a fleece head band to cover my ears if it’s windy.

Yeah, shoes and socks are a good idea as well. 

Last year I was able to play comfortably through December 28, not every day, but when the temp hit 40 (sometimes a little less), I hit the course.

Pick up some low compression golf balls and take one club longer to compensate for the temperature. Maxfli Soft-Flis are inexpensive and a great performer. 

Or, in the alternative, quote the Holy Modal Rounders, “If you’re afraid, then you’d better stay home.”

Hey, they’re still playing baseball... and Joe Maddon is the Most Interesting Man in Baseball ( and possibly the most interesting man in the world).

- Z. Vod


There have been some strange games this year. Home run hitters aren't hitting home runs, lights-out pitchers seem to fall apart all of a sudden and some players lose their ability to catch a baseball.
Oh, there are still the usual irritations
**Analysts who won't shut up
**Umpires whose strike zones make no sense
**Can we please get rid of those stupid strike zone cartoons. they're worse than the umpires.
**Batting statistics for the postseason have little value. A player who is 1 for 7 over two games is NOT in a slump. 
**Maybe I'm just old school, but poses and bat flips are for kids. You are professionals. Act like it.
**Joe Maddon, will you please shave. You look like you're second job is begging for change on the street.
**John Gibbons - is your face made of cement? You look the same whether you're mad, happy, confused or...constipated?

On the other hand, a real hero has developed that you wouldn't have predicted - the Met's Daniel Murphy.
The Cubs are being beaten by New York but the Blue Jays look awfully tight against the Royals. Josh Donaldson, who terrorized the American League, probably isn't even terrorizing his own batting practice pitcher. Joey Bats - isn't. but he is leading team in outwardly showing his disgust with all the umpires ability to call balls and strikes.

What is with these in-game interviews with the managers? Are they expecting something earth-shattering? One of them accidentally dropping an F-Bomb? At least that would make it worthwhile to listen. But the dribble they do produce could have been filmed before the playoffs started.
"Terry, Matt Harvey has only given up one hit so far. How pleased are you with that?" "Well Sam, we think he's pitching really well.Two analysts in the booth have already told us that.
How about this instead:
"Joe you're team is being shut out. How are you going to fix that?" "Next inning, we're going to try calling the pitcher really bad names. If that doesn't work, I guess we'll just go home." What do you think of that answer, Fox Sports? 

Where's that mute button?
Ron Darling has an irritating voice. Cal Ripken sounds like he's never watched a game from the booth before. Harold Reynolds must be getting paid by the word. This is television. We can actually SEE what's going on. "That's strike three!" We know, we know.
The networks do have a plan to solve this, though. Starting Monday, Pete Rose, Frank Thomas, Raul Ibanez, Max Scherzer and - hold on to your hats - Alex Rodriquez will be added to the staff. 
What gems can these guys add?  Max: "I struck him out easily all year." Frank: "Why are they hitting with toothpicks?" A-Rod: "I make more money than him." Pete: "I'll give you 2-1 he strikes out this time."  More ex-jocks. What are they going to add? This is like forcing a boilermaker on a passed out drunk. I can hardly wait.

A topic on the Sports Reporters today was about what effect a manager has on a game. The simple answer: "I never ever won a game for my team.  I lost a few, but I never won one"  -- Earl Weaver   

"The seventh inning of Game 5 between the Jays and Rangers lasted close to an hour. Or almost as long as the last three minutes of an NBA game. -- RJ Currie
"As of right now, the Chicago Cubs are the favorite to win the World Series. The last time that sentence appeared in print, there was a blacksmith shop across from the stadium."  -- Brad Dickson
"Bevo XIV, a longhorn steer who was the University of Texas mascot, has died from bovine leukemia. But he still might be a part of a memorial BBQ in his honor."  -- Janice Hough
"Cubs, Mets admit it would be embarrassing to lose in the playoffs to Mets, Cubs."  --
"In Pac-12 football play this season, the visiting team won 10 of the first 15 conference games. Veteran observers say they haven’t seen this much trauma at home since Elin discovered Tiger’s text messages"  -- Dwight Perry
" Playboy announced it will stop running nude photos next year. So now if you want to see a naked woman you’ll have to go to HBO, Showtime, Cinemax, the Internet, Burning Man, a PETA protest, perfume ads or ESPN The Magazine."  -- Seth Meyers
" A major league playoff game was delayed when Chase Utley took out three players, a mascot, a bullpen cart, a bat boy and most of the fans sitting down the third-base line with a hard slide."  -- Brad Dickson
"James Harden told he’s the best player in the NBA and was last year’s true MVP. Is it possible for someone’s beard to be too tight?"  -- RJ Currie




A Mets - Blue Jays World Series would be nice but, barring a Jays rally, increasingly improbable.
The Mets are one step closer with a big win in their series opener with the Cubs, giving Mets fans time to come up with something to do other than twirling shop rags in the stands when they get excited.
All of the derivatives of the Pittsburg “Terrible Towels” really must stop. It is just sad to see otherwise grown men waving dish towels in LA. Thankfully, the Dodgers were eliminated in five.
Blue Jays fans get a one time pass because, well, they are Canadians and, as they recently demonstrated, they don’t yet even understand the difference between throwing fedora and toques (specialized Canadian headwear) onto a hockey rink to celebrate hat tricks and chucking half-full beer cans, beaning babies in a ball park.
The Cubs have’t made it to a post-season in107 years so their fans clearly don’t have sufficient recent experience, say within the past five or six decades, to know how silly towel twirling looks unless your also screaming for your defense to rip a quarterback’s face off and mop up the field with your very own “Terrible Towel”.
As for the Royals, nothing that has happened in Missouri (or any place named Kansas for that matter) has made any sense since before the Civil War.
But, c’mon Mets, orange shop rags? You're in New York, ’The Big Apple’. You can do so much better.

 - Z. Vod

Friday, October 16, 2015


The championship games begin tonight in Kansas City, the Royals hosting the Blue Jays. I guess this is as it should be: the two teams with the best records in the AL. Toronto has that powerful lineup but it appears they also have karma on their side - and it is said, "Karma's a bitch."
I read a headline today that said, DODGERS FALL APART. Fall apart? 3-2 is hardly falling apart. If that's what you're looking for, I give you the Texas Rangers. Actually, it was all one man - Elvis Andrus. The poor guy, who is a very good fielder by the way, blew three straight plays, and even though no runs had scored yet, you knew it was all over. Later, Jose Bautista flung his bat almost to the shores of Lake Ontario and that was that. I don't think the Rangers will forget that.
KC beat a team that was in over it's head but didn't know it. Royals are good and the defending AL champs but I think Toronto will be the one advancing.

In the NL, the Cubbies continue their magical journey by stunning the Cardinals, so if there is a Cinderella team in the championship series, it has to be the Cubs. The underdog Mets shocked the Dodgers but they will be the favorites only in the New York area. The Cubs own the rest of the country. NY has that awesome pitching staff but right now, nothing scares Chicago. It'll be close, but I'm rooting for the Cubs.

My lovely sister-in-law in California wrote today that she's experiencing "playoff relief." Me, too. Once the Yanks were put out of their misery, I felt that the weight was off my back and now I could just enjoy baseball.  There is talk that Dodger front office is unhappy that the team hasn't fulfilled it's expected destiny - a World Championship. I think the owners are beginning to realize that a $300 million payroll does not buy the title.  It took the Yankees a long time to come to that realization and the Red Sox, a little quicker. So where do the Dodgers go from here? A lot of people think that Dan Mattingly will be the first to go. That little episode in the dugout with Andre Ethier probably didn't help either. Strangely, I can't find out anything about that screaming match, other than Mattingly saying it was nothing (of course). In NY, the tabloids would have published a word-for-word, blow-by-blow account of the incident. But LA is a little more laid back.

Early in one of the Games in Los Angeles, an announcers said he never heard a crowd this quiet. This is LA. the crowd doesn't even show up until the third inning.

Brad Dickson's Bottom Ten
 4. UCF (0-6): The Knights lost to Connecticut in a “rivalry game.” I think the winner got a trophy reading “WHY?”
 8. Fresno State (1-5): Fresno State’s idea of a balanced offense — an equal number of fumbles and interceptions.
 9. Idaho (1-4): The Vandals are coming off a bye week. I’m pretty sure it was homecoming.

"Eagles coach Chip Kelly said today he is not a candidate for the head coaching jobs at USC and Texas. Well, makes sense, he’s got a perfectly good job coaching an amateur team now."  -- Janice Hough
"Eli Manning has played behind nine centers. I believe this makes him a certified proctologist."  -- Brad Dickson
"A  fire destroyed 20 books at the Auburn University library: “The real tragedy was that 15 hadn’t been colored yet."  -- Steve Spurrier
"If the Tampa Bay Buccaneers’ secondary — after getting torched for four TD passes by the Jags’ Blake Bortles on Sunday — is looking for a theme song for player introductions, here’s a suggestion: “Stand By Your Man."  -- Dwight Perry
"I hear new coach Dan Campbell made the Dolphins do “Oklahoma drills” in practice. Oklahoma drills are tough: it took me days to nail the lyrics to Oh, What a Beautiful Mornin’."  -- RJ Currie
"So if  Chase Utley retires in the offseason do they suspend him for his first two old-timers games?"  -- Janice Hough
"The Fernando Rodney story: When he was born, his parents put a cap on their little bundle of joy. The doctor slapped him, but only his head moved, not the cap."  -- Tony Chong (From TC Ripley.)
"Playboy magazine announced it’s no longer going to feature nudes. This is like Popular Mechanics announcing that it’s no longer going to feature socket wrenches."  -- Brad Dickson


Sunday, October 11, 2015

It's Football Season (isn't it always?)

Relax. This is not another dump on the NFL and the legions of crazed and increasingly gambling addicted fans marching in the parade of Sunday afternoon football, Sunday Night Football, Monday Night Football, Thursday Night Football and 24-7-365 Fantasy (aka gambling) football. All have richly earned all that has been dumped on them to date and, here’s some news, it’s only going to get worse.

I once knew what football was about. Every fall we played sandlot football for hours at Oak Hill Park. Lakeside kids played at Fort Ontario and other neighborhood kids played in school yards all over the city. Some games were touch, others were tackle depending on our numbers, the more the better.

The one constant was no adults; no adult coaches, no adult referees, no adult spectators (Adults hanging around playgrounds? Bad news.), no helicopter parents, no benefactors providing uniforms, turf fields or travel teams. We picked our own teams, made up our own rules and settled our own disputes.

High school varsity games were on Friday nights or Saturday afternoons. We’d go to watch the ‘big kids’ play, horse around and dream about playing freshman football on stripped fields.

Some kids had helmets, fewer had shoulder pads. No under armor base layers; no light weight, impact resistance body armor, form hugging pants and jerseys, perfectly sized helmets with a wide variety of face guards, mouth guards, windshields - now beginning in elementary school. Not all of our gang had sneaks.

Playing professional football in the NFL, was a seasonal job and the league was not yet a tax exempt religion with services on Sunday afternoon, the NFL Sabbath, and follow up services Sunday evening and several weeknights for the truly faithful.

The NY Giants played  in Yankee Stadium and Jim Brown averaged over 100 yards per game rushing (still the lone player to achieve that feat) over his nine year career and retiring while still healthy (one of the few to achieve that feat). 

While it’s true that the Eagles Chuck Bednarek cracked Frank Giffords skull on a huge hit, the injury was most remarkable for its rarity. Players were neither big enough, strong enough or fast enough to deliver a steady stream of disabling blows.

In 1962 Julie London, dressed in a black sheath, plugging Marlboro’s during broadcasts of Giants - Browns battles was the sexiest thing on television. 

No more. That NFL no longer exists. 

The ‘game’ no longer exists. 

Big business, driven by big money has replaced the ‘game’. The NFL is an engine that drives television commercials and gambling. Cheerleaders show more cleavage and but crack than Victoria’s Secret catalogs and Plumbers Union Local 2877. Team loyalty is eroding. Owners have none for the cities they play in and fans increasingly care more about their fantasy teams. 

Yeah, I know, you’ve got to go. It’s time for a kickoff. Somewhere it’s always time for a kickoff.

 - Z. Vod


Well, it was quick and painless. NY probably wasn't going to go past the next round anyway, so it was good to get it over with fast.  Not so for the Pirates, who had a more than decent chance to go all the way.
As always in a short series, it's better to be the hot team than the better team.

You can learn a lot by watching.  -- Yogi Berra 
It's Deja Vu all over again.  -- Yogi Berra

Two 'Yogi-isms' that fit well here.

Chase Utley takes out Miguel Tejada on a tough slide, breaking up the double play. This happens all the time and occasionally, someone gets hurt. David Schoenfield, ESPN, usually takes the controversial side in any discussion so that he can appear to be relevant.  He just comes off as not understanding the game. If you listen to the former players, now analysts for ESPN, you'll get the real understanding of the play. It was completely legal. That Tejada got hurt is unfortunate but not unusual. If the pivot man gets hurt on this play, he probably didn't handle the play properly. In this case he didn't. He has to know the runner is bearing down on him, he's facing him. Instead of catching the ball and making the throw quickly, he tried a fancy pivot on the same side of the bag that the runner was heading for. Utley was very close to the bag, did not go in spikes up and slid into the fielder.
The fielder has options, too. He can come down on the runner with his spikes (not intentionally, of course), he can throw the ball right at the runner (again, not intentionally) and he can learn how to avoid the contact. Tejada didn't do any of these things. It only becomes a "dirty" play if someone gets hurt.

Actually, nothing was good about this play
1) The runner was called out initially.
2) After review, they called the runner safe because Tejada did not touch the bag.
3) Watching a replay turned up the fact that Utley never touched the bag either and ran off the field after the play ended.
The replay system has made nitpickers of everybody.  Without it, nobody would have known that Tejada just missed the bag. In the old days (there, I've said it), this would have been the old "neighborhood play" and Tejada would probably not have tried so hard to touch the bag.
Here's the other problem. Why was Utley brought back out to the base? Sure, the fielder never touched the bag, but neither did Utley. The other part is, that safe or out, if a runner leaves the field HE IS OUT. Automatically.
Maybe we should eliminate replays completely - or just limit it to fair or foul and home run or not.  Lets go back to the fallible umpires. If you watch them call balls and strikes, you know they're fallible.

Joe Girardi says he made the best decisions he could all year. He thinks the Yanks can win it all next year with the same team he has now. INSANITY: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Hey Joe, I understand the George Washington Bridge is for sale.

Now this is a good story.  Because of the severe flooding in South Carolina, the Gamecocks moved their football game against LSU to Baton Rouge. LSU turned over the income from tickets and concessions to South Carolina. In addition, since S. Carolina band couldn't make the trip, the LSU band learned Carolina's Alma Mater and fight song and played them both during the game. Way to go, LSU.
(From Janice Hough's column)

"Nebraska leads the nation in penalties. Saturday, there were two flags thrown during the Tunnel Walk."  -- Brad Dickson
"Eagles RB DeMarco Murray — who’s rushed for 47 yards on 29 carries this season — says he’s not getting the ball enough. At his current rate of 1.6 per, Murray would need 62 carries for a 100-yard game and seven carries just to get a first down."  -- Dwight Perry
" According to the crew on TSN, “everyone in Canada” has Blue Jays fever. Which prompted my wife to ask: “Who are the Blue Jays?”  -- RJ Currie
"It’s only the first week of the postseason, and I am so over playoff beards."  -- Janice Hough
"The goal for the new Werner Park party patio is to make fans feel as if they’re in their own backyard. In my case, that will require letting the infield grass grow two feet and planting a thousand dandelions."  -- Brad Dickson
"The late Yogi Berra, as quoted in, when Kirby Puckett landed a record $3 million-a-year contract in 1990: “If Branch Rickey was alive today, he’d roll over in his grave."  -- In Dwight Perry's Column
"Browns coach Mike Pettine said his squad “looked like a scout team” in a 27-20 loss to the Raiders: “Girl or Cub?”  -- Reader Chas K (Cleveland Plain Dealer)
"I have a few tickets left for the game Sunday,” tweeted owner Jed York of the bedraggled 49ers. “Let me know if you can make it. Tweeted  in response: “I can’t give my tickets away either, Jed.”  -- Jake Echanove, 49ers fan
"London-born British chancellor George Osborne said he hopes to have an NFL team in his city within the next five years. “Me too,” said the mayor of Cleveland"  -- RJ Currie
"The Nobel Peace Prize has just been awarded. In a mild upset it went to the Washington Nationals pitching coach who broke up a dugout fight."  -- Brad Dickson
" NFL refs to wear No. 12 at all Seahawks home games.”  -- TC Chong
"Singer Justin Bieber drew the ire of UFC star Ronda Rousey by refusing to pose for a picture with her little sister: “Bieber’s funeral is tomorrow.”  -- Conan O'Brien


Tuesday, October 06, 2015


This is it: the final 10 teams. I won't post any odds on the teams because that's more a function of
betting than the actual strength of the teams. Remember, any professional team, regardless of it's regular season record, can get hot and ride that streak for the next 4 weeks.
Here are my thoughts on the possibilities of each team to win it all, from most likely to "how-did-they-get-in?"

1) St Louis Cardinals - Injuries don't bother them, slumps don't bother them, hot teams don't scare them, somehow they always seem to be there.
2) Toronto Blue Jays  - They got hot, stayed hot and they have the scariest lineup in the postseason
3) New York Mets  - The best pitching of the ten. The rule is: "Good Pitching Stops Good Hitting" A NY/Toronto series would be verrrry interesting.
4) Pittsburgh Pirates  - Gritty team, very gritty. They don't seem to know when they're beaten.
5) Kansas City Royals  - A talented group but they won't surprise anyone this year. Their young players will find out how hard it is to repeat success.
6) Chicago Cubs  - The Cinderella team of the year. Joe Madden may still have some tricks up his sleeve. It wouldn't surprise me if he brought Steve Bartman into the clubhouse. No shock if they were to win it all.
7) Los Angeles Dodgers  - They should be higher, but this team underachieves every year. They are very talented but Don Mattingly doesn't seem to know how to use it.
8) Texas Rangers  - They ended strong, but they're a flawed team.
9) New York Yankees  - If they hit, they will beat up a lot of teams...but they won't hit. They should be #10 but, I'm a Yankee fan
10) Houston Astros  - A young unknown team. I don't think they even know how they got here. The plan was for them to make a move next year, but here they are. With Keuchel pitching, they will probably advance at least to the next round.

Everybody has their favorites and their own idea of the results, and these are mine. If I was smart enough to really know how this would turn out, I wouldn't be writing this blog; I'd be sitting in an easy chair in a Vegas casino, eating open-faced prime rib sandwiches and drinking scotch. How's that sound, Fran?

Brad Dickson's Bottom Ten
4. UCF (0-5): At halftime, the Knights’ marching band spelled out “Enough Already!”
8. Miami (Ohio) (1-4): Miami lost to Kent State in a game that you’re not allowed to show POWs according to the Geneva Conventions.
10. Texas State (1-3): Pessimistic fans have been spotted waving signs reading: “Just wait till the year after next year or maybe the one after that.”

Too bad about CC Sabathia. He wasn't going to be the #1 vital cog in the postseason for the Yanks, but he always gave everything he had every time he went out there. We wish him luck.

"What’s the big deal about pitcher Jonathan Papelbon trying to wring teammate Bryce Harper’s neck? The Nationals have spent the last three years choking"  -- RJ Currie
"Yankees pitcher C.C. Sabathia has checked himself into alcohol rehab. Shocking. Not that an athlete goes to rehab, but he does it without being arrested first."  -- Janice Hough
"After only four games, the Miami Dolphins have axed head coach Bill Philbin. I guess Philbin now sleeps with the fishes"  -- Marc Ragovin
"Jonathan Papelbon arrested after strangling man with 17 grocery items in ‘15 items or less’ line."  --
"Grateful Dead fans are petitioning the NFL for the group to perform at halftime of the Super Bowl. This is a terrific idea, if you don’t mind a 7-hour halftime show.This would allow me to realize my longtime dream of witnessing a Super Bowl second half where everyone is playing with a contact high."  -- Brad Dickson
"That ball is so far left, Lassie couldn’t find it even if it was wrapped in bacon."  -- golf commentator David Feherty
"The Hot New Thing every quarterback has to have: eye discipline. How do QBs develop that? I don’t know. Take their wives to the beach?"  -- Scott Ostler
"Orlando’s Basement bar is offering free beer until Central Florida’s 0-4 football team wins a game.
Coincidence? The Knights’ top-selling jersey has the number .08 on it."  -- Dwight Perry
" Pete Rose met with MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred on Monday. Neither party would reveal what was discussed, but an unnamed source claims that they both agreed that the Toronto Blue Jays would be 3-2 favorites to win The World Series."  -- TC Chong
"Reuters reports mathematicians used a unique formula to prove a 17th-century emperor fathered 888 children in just 30 years. He also excelled at basketball."  -- RJ Currie
"The Aksarben Rodeo was just held in Omaha. The World-Herald assigned its rodeo expert. Our “rodeo expert” is a guy who once rode a mechanical bull in a Dallas nightclub after two vodka gimlets."  -- Brad Dickson