THINGS YOU WON'T BELIEVE

## "King" Felix Hernandez, arguably the best pitcher in baseball, was shelled last night by the NY Yankees, arguably the worst division leader in baseball, for 7 runs.

##  With dark clouds overhead and rain in the forecast, the Seattle mariners kept their dome OPEN before the game. It hardly ever rains in Seattle, does it?

##  Why hasn't the NBA finals started yet? Are they waiting for a decision from "King James" LeBron?

##  Why hasn't the NHL finals started yet? Are they trying to outlast the NBA?

##  The sports media is trying to find out if  Riley Curry will bring her dad, Stephen, to her next press conference.

##  We have watched many players being interviewed on the field after a game, get a Gatorade bath while talking. The interviewer, often a lady, will get a bath along with him. How long before this gets really, really embarrassing for these ladies, who are usually dressed very nicely?

##  Will this be the year that a division winner in baseball has a sub-.500 record?

##  Question: Would you rather pay $5 million for a .157 average hitter than $24 million for a .320 hitter?  The Yankees did.

##  I remember listening to Mel Allen or Red Barber doing baseball broadcasts all alone. Vin Scully STILL does them all alone for the Dodgers. The Yanks have at least two, often three plus Meredith wandering around the stands. On Sunday nights, ESPN has three in the booth and TWO in the stands. If they would put the game situation on the screen, we really wouldn't need any of them.
I'm trying to find out if it's true that ESPN will have one reporter in the parking lot next week.

##  Speaking of Meredith Marakovits, why is she wandering around the stadiums? Can she not find the booth or won't they give her a key?

##  Has anyone found Chase Headley's glove? He has 11 errors so far this season after averaging less than 9 per season in his first 8 years. Horace Clark averaged a tad over 11 in his 7 seasons as the Yanks 2nd baseman.

##  Have you ever seen a better fielding first baseman than Mark Teixeira? Maybe they should be checking  his glove for pine tar.

##  Robinson Cano isn't hitting like Robinson Cano so far. Can we blame it on his inability to take his leisurely strolls, circling the catcher and umpire, a couple of times during his at-bats?

##  Josh Hamilton is making the LA Angels look like their decision to dump him was a little hasty.

***THEY SAID IT***
"At a Four Seasons in Texas, Johnny Manziel got frustrated with a fan and threw a water bottle at him. Fortunately the situation didn’t escalate any further, as no doubt Manziel’s throw missed the guy by a foot."  -- Janice Hough
"Cincinnati Reds first baseman Joey Votto drew a three-ball walk. Finally, our low math scores are having an impact."  -- Brad Dickson
"Police were called to a Michigan McDonald’s after it turned away a man wearing scuba gear. I recall carrying jumper cables into a restaurant once; they warned me not to start anything"  -- RJ Currie
"What have you done to our pitcher?"  -- An e-mail to Chad Picasner from Dwight Perry, Seattle Times night Sports Editor
"Seahawks’ DE Michael Bennett says that playing for coach Pete Carroll “is like playing for Willy Wonka.” Well, except for at the end of the movie, Willy Wonka handed off the factory."  -- Bill Littlejohn
"Lawmakers have voted to repeal the death penalty in Nebraska.Though they will make an exception whenever a Cornhusker football coach loses three games in a season."  -- Dwight Perry

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