Wednesday, March 30, 2011


(I'm practicing to be an NCAA Tournament announcer)

The Tournament doesn't begin again until Saturday and Baseball doesn't start until tomorrow, so get your rest, ladies, the flood is coming. I've mentioned before that the NCAA announcers won't ever shut up. Norman Chad, of the Washington Post, concurs. He titled his latest column, "The MVP of the NCAAs is the Mute Button." He also lists some of the prattle we've had to listen to.

A man in Beavercreek, Ohio, got a cable bill from Time-Warner: $16,400,000! I assume he was getting HBO AND Cinemax.

The staff of ESPN (writers, commentators, analysts and, I assume, janitors) made their pre-season baseball projections. The 45 prognosticators picked each division winner, wildcard, League champion and World Series winner. 42 of them picked Boston to make the WS and 33 of them picked Boston to win it all. I guess we don't have to play the games after all.

Stop the discussion, Gardner leads off against right-handed pitchers, Jeter against lefties. Whew! Glad that's settled.

This is pretty sad. Here's a note from RJ Currie's column, Sports Deke: "Some of you have asked why I haven't posted in a while. Last week I was stunned to learn someone had been stealing half a dozen jokes or more each week from Sports Deke and publishing them Thursdays - under his own name - in a Memphis magazine. This has been going on for some time. I stopped posting until I could follow up. I discovered this while searching key words from one of my jokes. He had also appropriated several lines from my friend - and a dean of sports humour in Canada - Cam Hutchinson of the StarPhoenix. While he was at it, he stole the odd line from other contributors to Cam's Saturday column, including Janice Hough, Bill Littlejohn and Torben Rolfsen. Also from the American dean of sports humour (and friend), Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times. I contacted the magazine's editor (who I believe knew nothing about this). He assured me they'd put a stop to it. Last Thursday, the column still ran, but without our jokes. My thanks to the editor for that. (My further hope was they'd fire the plagiarizing dude's ass.) Unfortunately, as of today, back-dated Thursday columns remain online with our stolen quips intact. My fellow humourists and I are always pleased when someone runs one of our lines. But not when they try to pass it off as their own. The extent of this plagiarism - well, it's almost unbelievable. This may be in part why a friend suggested I post it here; a cautionary tale perhaps."

Finally, this from Brad Dickson: "The FAA is studying what is an acceptable amount of mistakes in an airport control tower. Halt the study, the correct answer is zero."


No comments: