The Yankees spent over $500 million dollars to improve their offense this winter. Did it work? Yesterday, they were no-hit in a game in Panama. Doesn't matter how far away you go, if you get no-hit, people are going to hear about it.
YOU CAN TRY TO DO IT LIKE THE DODGER AND THE DIAMONDBACKS.
They're traveling 7500 miles to hide their inadequacies. They're opening the season in Australia, which means a 16-hour plane trip. This might work. I'm told baseball holds almost no interest to the Aussies. If they play a game and no one goes, does the game really count?
AGE BEFORE BEAUTY
The Phillies had the oldest team in the National League last year. The GM, Ruben Amaro, Jr. signed four free agents this winter. One 30 year-old, two 36 year-olds and one 33 year-old. I think Amaro has taken that age thing to another level.
THERE MAY BE A MAJOR DEAL STILL IN THE WORKS
Who is having the best spring at the plate for the Yanks. Why, it's Francisco Cervelli. He was hitting over .440 the last time I looked and he has three homers so far. The Yanks are playing Atlanta, who are looking for catching help. It wouldn't be much of a stretch to see see "The Cisco Kid" leave town in a Braves uniform today.
WHY IS HE UNHAPPY?
There is talk that shortstop Jimmy Rollins is unhappy with his manager because Ryne Sandberg didn't play him for three games. And didn't tell him why. Gee, I always thought the manager decides when you play and doesn't owe you an explanation. But then, I'm not making $14 million dollars. For $14 million, I'll sit on the bench. As Phil Linz once told Yogi Berra, "Play me or keep me."
ADD ANOTHER DISGRUNTLED REJECT
Former Panther receiver Steve Smith is another athlete that's holding a grudge against his former team. When asked about playing against the Panthers, he said, "Put your goggles on, cause there's going to be blood and guts everywhere." Don't these guys know it's unhealthy to hold in your rage?
T 1:00 PM, I'll be watching Virginia against Duke. Should be a good one.
Annie-O and I were talking yesterday, and I happen to mention the four-corner offense from the 70's. She had never heard of it. Which led to other former rules she never heard of such as no shot clock in college ball and having a tip-off after every basket. Of course, there weren't that many baskets scored way back then, so it wasn't the distraction that you would think.
Am I showing my age?
***THEY SAID IT***
"A martial arts expert broke 155 walnuts with his forehead. If I’m not mistaken, this was the halftime show at a CBI play-in game." -- Brad Dickson
"Barry Bonds is a guest hitting instructor for the San Francisco Giants this spring. He hasn't done a lick yet for anyone's batting average, but flaxseed-oil futures certainly skyrocketed." -- Dwight Perry
"There is a proposal to move the NFL's extra-point try from the 2-yard line to the 25. Why stop there" Let's also blindfold the kicker and have the goal posts move like a shooting gallery. Now we're talking." -- Len Berman
"Two Oscar voters admitted to picking 12 Years a Slave for best picture despite not seeing the film. They were busy judging Olympic figure skating." -- RJ Currie
"The Washington Wizards’ Marcin Gortat wants the NBA to allow NHL-type fights. The NBA is only willing to consider MLB-style fights, where everyone runs out, flails wildly and falls to the ground out of breath." -- Brad Dickson
" Hell Freezing Over moment for the week. An athlete being honest about dollars: Steve Nash, responding to those who think he should walk away from the NBA “The reality is, I’m not going to retire because I want the money.”" -- Janice Hough
"Question: Would it be rude, or even impolitic, for even one of TV’s college basketball analysts or reporters to ask a kid how, given his impoverished background, he was able to cover his body in elaborate and expensive tattoos?" -- Phil Mushnick
"The Canucks losing to the Isles by giving up seven third-period goals has been called a monumental collapse. In a related item, Victoria Beckham had her implants removed." -- RJ Currie
"Canucks tickets are being had for as little as
$40 each. If you’re really lucky, when the guy gives you the ticket and the 40
bucks, he’ll throw in a parking pass as well." -- TC Chong
CP-
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