Thursday, May 02, 2013


Please take David Cone with you. Apparently, he has depleted his arsenal of stories and anecdotes. We had to listen to a repetition of his sabermetric statistics and his forecast of how they will finalize. After listening to Coney describe how bad the Houston Astro's team WHIP was for the fourth time, I was actually missing Joe Morgan (not really).  Part of his job, I assume, is to notice the little things on the field and point them out - ONCE. I had to listen to Coney describe how far apart Chris Stewart's knees were when he was catching so many times, I started to get nervous. Also, Stewart, we found out, is 6 ft. 5, in case you fell asleep for three innings.

Why are the official scorers so generous with their calls? Two nights ago, a hitter lined a one-hopper to the Astro shortstop. He backhanded it, spun around and let it fall out of his glove as he attempted to throw. Base hit. Last night, a batter hit a grounder up the middle, which Nunez missed when it hit off his glove. Another base hit. Folks, these are major league players. Both of those calls should have been errors. I also object to the difference between a passed ball and a wild pitch. The ONLY time it's a wild pitch, is when the catcher has no chance to stop the ball. Just because a pitch hits the ground first and bounces off the catcher, it shouldn't be called a wild pitch.

As long as I'm in a "rant" mood, let's call a time out - which umpires do indiscriminately.  Pitchers walk around the mound, pick up the rosin bag, check the infield positions, the outfield positions, everything but the disposition of the ball girl. The batter will step out on every pitch to restrap his batting gloves, adjust his uniform, tap his spikes do some calisthenics (Ichiro), or circle the catcher and umpire (Cano). Consequently, the games take 3+ hours. The umpire can stop this by simply saying "Play Ball," and calling a ball or strike depending on who's not ready. The rule book says, "The batter is not at liberty to step in and out of the batter's box at will." And stop calling time out for the batter when the pitcher is ready to pitch. I quote the rule: "Umpires will not call "Time" at the request of the batter or any member of his team once the pitcher has started his windup or has come to a set position even though the batter claims "dust in his eyes," "steamed glasses," "didn't get the sign" or for any other cause."    The umpire isn't supposed to engage a player coach or fan in conversation, either.

** The Yanks found a way to win again, using some excellent base running by Eduardo Nunez and Ichiro Suzuki. Even Brett Gardner found the courage to steal two bases. And can we please quit talking about getting the "regulars" back? These guys are doing fine. By the way, the Yanks have traded for infielder Chris Nelson from the Colorado Rockies for a player to be named later - which I hope, is David Cone.

**For all you fans who thought the Yanks should have gone after Josh Hamilton, he's currently hitting .214 with 2 homers, 9 RBIs and is on a pace to strike out 200 times.

There is a discussion as to whether or not Tim Hudson is a candidate for the Hall of Fame, not that he has won his 200th game. Why is Andy Pettitte thought of as a 'marginal' candidate, when he has 248 wins? And Mike Musina has 270 wins and he's been pretty much dismissed as a viable candidate.

"Texas A & M announced plans to renovate their football stadium to seat 102,500. Not that we need anything to put football in Texas in perspective, but the population of College Station, TX, where A & M is located, is 95,142."  -- Janice Hough
"Ohio State passed out rings to its football team for going 12-0 while on probation. The amazing thing is 20 minutes later, only 16 of the rings had been swapped for tattoos."  --  Brad Dickson
" A new survey says the U.S. city having the most sex per capita is Los Angeles, averaging 135 times a year. Or 12 times a year if you exclude the Lakers and Clippers."  -- RJ Currie

"The 12-team Big Ten is realigning its maligned Leaders and Legends setup, replacing it with East and West divisions. So now that they've finally aced geography, maybe they can move on to math."  -- Dwight Perry
"Notre Dame star Manti Te'o was passed over in the first round: The NFL draft gives football players a chance for the first time to feel what it's like to be picked last in gym class."  -- Argus Hamilton
"Summing up Tebow's career stats as a Jet: "17 magazine covers, 139 Daily News back-page headlines, 6 completions."  -- Rick Reilly
"In Purcell, Okla., a meth lab was found to be operating out of a golf course porta-potty. This is sign No. 1 that your new country club isn't all that prestigious."  -- Brad Dickson
"A Huffington Post report claims May has long been the best time to get a new mattress. "New mattress?" said Tiger Woods. "All this time I thought it was mistress."  -- RJ Currie
"Scientists in Japan have built a baseball-playing robot, and it's certainly authentic. Its A sample just tested positive for STP."  -- Dwight Perry


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