First Tiger makes an illegal drop, which is approved by tournament marshals (golfing on-hand umpires), but disputed by a call-in by a fan who watched it on TV. This isn't baseball: in golf you can penalize someone AFTER the round is over.
Then Tiger is accused by Garcia of deliberately inciting fans boisterous reactions during his swing. Even though this event is not held in a church, you must maintain that same kind of reverence. Again, according to Tiger, a marshal gave him permission to begin play.
Now it's time for the verbal battles to begin:
Reporter to Tiger: "Would you consider calling Sergio and try to patch things up?"
Reporter to Sergio: "Would you ask Tiger to dinner when you see him next week?"
Sergio: "Sure. We'll order fried chicken."
(No laughter) Sure, what's a feud without a little racism.
On another front, golfer Vijay Singh is accused of using deer antler spray, a banned substance. He is later exonerated, but so what? Let's sue the PGA anyway. How does deer-antler spray help, anyway? Does it give you an advantage in the woods? (I will eschew the obvious "horny" jokes)
The PGA has officially banned the use of belly-putters, which sounds somewhat kinky if you don't know what a belly-putter is. For those of you who don't know, it's an extra long putter that is anchored against the golfer's body as he putts. It's supposed to give you extra stability. Baseball has it's corked bats, now golf has it's own illegal equipment.
## Oh yeah, baseball. The Yanks lose their second game in a row, which is unusual, and another player gets hurt, which is not. Kuroda got hit in the calf by a batted ball and eventually had to be removed from the game. It's not expected that he will miss a turn in the rotation, but it's early yet.
On the medical front, nothing has changed: A-Rod's doing fine as is Jeter, Pineda, Cervelli and Pettitte. Teixeira and Youkilis are "close." Nunez isn't talked about, nor is Stewart. Did I miss anybody?
## If you're in the mood for a little fireworks, check out tonight's game in Boston against Cleveland on MLB Network. It's Terry Francona's debut in Fenway Park in a different uniform.
## Jose Canseco, an admitted steroid user, has been accused of sexual assault in Las Vegas. I wonder if he is trying out a PED, say deer-antler spray? I see a new book in his future.
***THEY SAID IT***
"BuzzFeed’s top 10 words in tabloid headlines: baby; secret; wedding; pregnant; marriage; sex; shocking; cheating; divorce; diet. Right up to diet, anyone else thinking of the NBA?" -- RJ Currie
"The Economist says New York has the most billionaires of any city in the world. I can't see this being big news to Yankees fans." -- RJ Currie
"Four women have qualified to race in this Sunday’s Indy 500. Yeah, four women going around and around in circles — or as that’s normally called, "The View." -- Jimmy Fallon
"Redskins fans are flooding millionaire QB Robert Griffin III with wedding gifts. Nice to know that so many people who probably wouldn't give a can of soup for a food drive will buy new sheets for RGIII." -- Jeff Schultz
"Bea Arthur Naked" — an artist's fantasy painting of the late "Golden Girls" star — sold for a whopping $1.9 million at a New York auction. Makes one wonder what a Marge Schott knock-off might fetch." -- Dwight Perry