HELL HAS FROZEN OVER

You don't believe me? Check last night's Yankee box score. Mark Teixeira has stolen a base. No, really, he has stolen a base. Plus (are you sitting down?), he stole home! No, he didn't sneak out after the game with a shovel and dig up the plate, he actually stole home during the game. In all honesty, it was a fluke. The A's caught A-Rod napping at first base and during the rundown, Tex lumbered home. It counts, though. Next thing you know, Jorge Posada will get a hit off a left-hander. ....naw, never happen.
By the way, the Yanks won 10-3, with the win going to another Yankee retread, Freddie Garcia, who's last pitch finally reached home plate about 4:00 this morning, three hours after Girardi took him out.
A few observations watching the game.
**A-Rod leads the team in batting average with the sickest .287 average I've ever seen. He generates so little power that it looks like his bat is made out of balsa wood.
**Granderson, on the other hand, is hitting the ball so hard I'm waiting for them to test HIS bat for cork, steroids or flubber.
**I believe official scorers are getting tired of the "Jeter Countdown to 3000 hits," routine being practiced by the crack(ed) YES broadcast team. Last night, the scorer posted a hit on the scoreboard BEFORE the 2nd baseman had a chance to kick the groundball away. They changed it to an error when the scorer was reminded that the 3000th hit was "scheduled" to happen in New York.
**Jeter has ruined the hit-by-pitch routine for everyone. Last night, Gardner had to prove he got hit by showing the umpire the bone protruding from his hand before he let him take first.
**The game was so out of hand last night, that Girardi allowed Larry, Curly and Moe to finish up. Oops, sorry, Moe had the night off.
**The huge stadium looked empty last night. The first game started at 4:10, last night it was 10:05 and today it's 3:35. There's your problem. It Los Angeles they leave the game int the 7th inning because they don't know when it ends. In Oakland, they don't know when it starts. I think they have to change the name, too. "Overstock.com" certainly doesn't fit the attendance numbers here.
**Is it my imagination, or does David Cone look like he came to the game directly from a nightclub? It's possible: this is where his drinking buddy, David Wells, lives.

***IN OTHER SPORTS...***
Somebody just told me that the NHL and the NBA finals are starting this week. For what season? Football is over, though, right? Tennis doesn't count unless the Williams sisters are playing and with Tiger no longer a factor, Phil Michelson is going to have to sleep with some stewardesses if he expects me to watch. Golf on TV is as exciting as Bowling. Both sports are better enjoyed when you play them. ...and in bowling, the beer is colder.

From Janice Hough:
"Maybe once OSU ends up on probation, they can talk to USC about playing a charity exhibition game instead of a bowl game this year. The game could be sponsored by Aladdin Bail Bonds."

CP-