Thursday, February 16, 2012

...AND I FORGOT TO SAY --

***YANKS STILL TRYING TO TRADE BURNETT***
Yesterday, I speculated that money seemed to be the issue in the stalled deal with Pittsburgh. Here's the inside scoop. The player the Yanks wanted from the Pirates (who refused) was OF Garrett Jones. Why, you ask? Well, it wasn't because of his .243 BA, 16 homers and 58 RBIs. No, Jones went to arbitration and asked for $2.5 million dollars, while the Pirates countered with $2.25 million. Brian Cashman was heard to say, "That's $4.75 million all together, right? We'll take it." Note to Brian: Use those accountants.

***BOBBY VALENTINE'S ALREADY AT IT***
The headline was, "Nobody likes change." I thought , there's good news for the KFC franchise on Yawkey way, but then I read the rest of the article. Stay with me, now:
"We all know that no one likes change except for those who are making other people change of what that person want them to. I happen to be one of those guys who likes change because guys are doing what I want them to do. I would bet there will be 100 guys who won't really like it because it's change for them. But they'll get used to it." (I didn't write this, I just copied it.) How's that again? It's going to be a good year for Boston writers.

***PLAYERS WHO NEED TO STEP UP THIS YEAR***
Carl Crawford: He honestly didn't look like he was trying all that hard for the last six weeks. I don't think he was comfortable with the character of the Red Sox clubhouse. Or maybe he just didn't like the city of Boston. Whatever the reason, the advent of Bobby Valentine should give him the impetus to change. He'd better, and not just because of the money. His reputation is at stake.
Adam Dunn: A .159 BA with 11 home runs just won't cut it this year. Nobody understands why the White Sox hung with him so long other than to justify the $14 million they were forced to pay him. They won't be so forgiving this year. Dunn's nick name is "Big Donkey." Someone should remind him there's another name for 'donkey.'
A-ROD: He's the Yankees' clean-up hitter and he better start acting like one. Yes, I know he's had injuries, but injuries don't drive in runs. Yogi Berra once said, "You can't take your clippings up to the plate." You can't take your doctor up there, either.
Yu Darvish: If he can't perform at a high level, Major League teams aren't going to risk $100+ million to sign these 'phenom' pitchers out of Japan anymore. It's tough when you're carrying a whole nation on your back. Trenton, NJ, is full of Japanese pitchers who couldn't cut it (well, one, anyway).

***ARE YOU LISTENING MLB UMPIRES?***
Three officials from the Metro-Atlantic Athletic Conference were suspended for mis-handling the game clock during a Rider-Niagara game.
"Ali Langford's dunk with 3.7 seconds left gave Niagara an 84-82 lead. Following a Rider timeout, the game clock started before the Broncs inbounded the ball but it wasn't noticed. Jonathan Thompson hit a 3-pointer at the buzzer that would have given Rider the win, but after a TV review, officials ruled time had expired before Thompson released the shot."
Major League umpires have screwed up the ball-strike count, the number of outs, etc. and they just say, "Oops, sorry. Heh, heh." Maybe a day without pay would change some of that.

Texas Ranger OF Josh Hamilton, had another alcohol-related relapse. A very sad thing and we wish him luck dealing with this problem.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Three suggested slogans for the Yankees new his-and-hers fragrances: 3. Smells better than a pair of Sox; 2. We make dollars and scents; 1. More whiffs than A-Rod." -- RJ Currie
"The fledging Women's Premier Soccer League got quite a publicity boost this month when national-team star Alex Morgan appeared in Sports Illustrated's swimsuit issue — wearing nothing but body paint. Well, duh: She plays for the Western New York Flash." -- Dwight Perry
What, Randy Moss might succeed Plaxico Burress as a Jets wideout? "Makes perfect sense. Replace a player known for shooting himself in the leg with a player known for shooting himself in the foot." -- Jim Stallings. Arkansas Democrat-Gazette
"A new breed called a Xoloitzcuintli debuted at the Westminster Dog Show this week. I remember when that used to be called an eye chart. It's an exotic breed from Mexico that stands about 10 inches high. Xoloitzcuintli is an Aztec name meaning "yippy ankle biter." Xoloitzcuintli. If you want to end next month's Midwest Spelling Bee quickly, begin with this word." -- Brad Dickson
"In a survey of America's rudest cities, Boston finished fifth. It's misleading. Take away Bill Belichick and Boston is 37th." -- Brad Dickson
"The Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue came out today. On Valentine's Day. That doesn't seem appropriate. Photographs of busty young women. It's like handing out free bacon on Passover." -- Craig Ferguson

CP-

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