WHO'S IN CHARGE HERE?

I'm confused. If you go to the ballpark, you will hear vendors call out, "You can't tell the ballplayers without a scorecard. Here are some cases where a scorecard would really help - except I can't find one, even on e-bay.

Roger Goodell says he is the Commissioner of the NFL (The No Fun League). Under the Collective Bargaining Agreement, Goodell thinks he has the right to apply whatever discipline he wants to any situation against either a player, coach, team or owner for any violation regardless of the crime. That's a pretty big sword to hand to any one person. The courts have now decided that that's not true. Goodell still thinks he is king of the hill, the players see a crack in the armor and the owners just want to know how much will this cost. So I ask again, "Who's In Charge Here?"

Mets pitcher Matt Harvey is coming off TJ surgery and has thrown 165 innings so far this year. His doctor has [decreed - suggested - guessed] that 180 innings should be the limit this year. The Mets General Manager, Sandy Alderson, says there is no such limit and THEY will decide how long he will pitch. Matt Harvey has been silent so far. His agent, Scott Boras (pause, while everyone genuflects), says 180 is THE limit, end of discussion. Manager Terry Collins says Harvey's arm will tell us when to shut him down. Two years ago, the Washington Nationals, with a solid chance to make the playoffs,  shut down their ace pitcher, Stephen Strasburg, after 183 innings. Washington missed the playoffs. If the Mets are going to go deep in the playoffs, they are going to need their ace. So...W I C H?

Yankee first baseman Mark Teixeira is out for who knows how long. The only regular firstbaseman left on the roster is rookie Greg Bird. If they want to give him a night off, who replaces him? Well there are a lot of options, none of them very good. Manager Joe Girardi says he would put A-Rod there in a pinch. GM Brian Cashman says no way. A-Rod says nobody has said anything to him. Girardi has repeated his opinion and so has Cashman. Teixeira better heal up soon, because the Yankees obviously don't know W I C H.

By the way, what's up with this "W" logo. Does it belong to Wegman's grocery chain? Walgreens? The Washington Nationals? Right now, when I see this, I don't know if I'm supposed to buy my dinner, see a ball game or fill a prescription? Can someone help? W I C H?

 

***THEY SAID IT***
"BYU players included Toloa’i Ho Ching, Ului Lapuaho, Travis Tuiloma and Moroni Laulu-Pututau. Considering this, who would ever want to be the public address announcer?"  -- Brad Dickson
 --My spell-check program just crashed. - CP
"Waze Navigation signed Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski to be the voice of a GPS app. Customers report, however, that they always seem to end up at a bar or a hospital."  -- Bill Littlejohn

"CoCo Vandeweghe totaled her tennis racket — smashing it five times — after falling behind 5-0 in her second-round match at the U.S. Open. In other words, she went CoCo for Koo-Koo Puffs"  -- Dwight Perry

"Northwestern defeated Stanford in The Battle of Teams Whose Players Actually Study."  -- Brad Dickson
"Washington has announced that Cousins and not RGIII will be their starter. Sort of like the Titanic announcing a new captain taking over after hitting the iceberg?"  -- Janice Hough
"After Edwin Encarnación's third homer in one game, Toronto fans threw caps on the field in hockey’s hat-trick tradition. Probably because they didn’t get a chance to throw them at Leafs’ games."  -- RJ Currie
" In May, an Ohio newspaper published the results of an investigation that suggested those parents who saved or were saving money for their kids’ Ohio college educations would rise in revolt if they knew how much of their money was being applied to football and basketball. So if you save to send your kid to college, you will be sending two — yours and someone on the football team."  -- Phil Mushnick
"In the Little League World Series championship game, a team from Japan defeated one from Pennsylvania. I’d still like to commend the Philadelphia Phillies for giving it their all."  -- Brad Dickson
"Patriots QB Tom Brady beat the NFL in court. Brady was pretty psyched, but I thought it was a bit much when he dumped a bucket of Gatorade on the judge’s head."  -- Jimmy Fallon

"Taking a midday nap can help lower blood pressure and decrease the risk of a heart attack, according to findings presented at the European Society of Cardiology Conference. Or, as doctors in Cleveland put it, “Take these two Browns tickets and call me in the morning."  -- Dwight Perry

"A friend gave me a ticket from the Angels-Orioles game of Sept. 6, 1995 (right), 20 years ago today, Cal Ripken’s 2,131st consecutive game to break Lou Gehrig’s record. It was for a seat in a luxury suite. Cost? Eighteen dollars. Today, $18 leaves you $27 short of a space in the Yankee Stadium parking lot."  -- Phil Mushnick  {Wait till you try to get into the Stadium - CP}

CP-

 

GIRARDI IS IN FULL PANIC MODE

If you're any kind of baseball historian - which basically means that you've watched baseball a long time - you know the best way to blow a season is to completely misuse your pitchers. Yankee manager Joe Girardi is about to do just that.
It's so bad, that the minute Girardi walks out of the dugout, I know something dumb is about to happen. Joe has only TWO relievers in the bullpen, that is, only two that he trusts. Dellin Betances is supposed to be the 8th inning guy, but Joe can't seem to get through the 7th inning without bringing in the big guy. Shreve, Wilson and Warren aren't trusted to get anywhere near critical situations and it's got to be wearing on their confidence. Last night the Yanks were pounding Boston 13-5, when things started to go wrong in the 8th inning.  I asked Annie-O if Andrew Miller was warming up yet. She laughed and said, "No, it's Betances first."  Then we both laughed. When NY's 8-run lead shrunk(?) to 6, Girardi almost ran out to the mound to bring in Betances. He did let someone else start the 9th (a rookie, no less) but with the lead now down to five - that's five, boys and girls - here comes Miller.
The Yanks may make the division race tight, but I think the bullpen will eventually blow up and the Yanks will lose. Girardi is always saying that he likes his bullpen - he just doesn't like them actually in the game.

Speaking of confidence builders, What the heck did Joe do for rookie Rico Noel's self esteem last night?  This fellow, who hasn't been able to hit double or triple A pitching, was brought up to be solely a pinch-runner because of his speed. Last night Girardi puts him in the outfield as a defensive replacement. In the bottom of the inning, Noel comes up to bat with two outs and a man on third in a 12-7 Yankee lead. Nope, out comes a pinch hitter. Poor Noel plays exactly one half inning. Sure had to feel good about his Major League debut.

Can someone please tell David Cone to just shut up? He makes one point and then beats it into the ground, repeating  it in three or four different ways. We get it, Coney. Last night he said Boston's Green Monster has a heartbeat, so for the next two innings, we had to listen to "Thump-thump, thump-thump." Really cute, David, really cute. Al Leiter talks too much too, but it least it's instructive. 
Coney also likes to take both sides of an issue: in one breath he talks about cybernetics being so useful, but in the next, he talks about the "eye-test," which means you can tell a lot by watching how the players go about playing. How about the ear-test David? You've said enough when my ears start to bleed!

Why professional sports is such a great career:
 “No more calls, we have a winner! Arrest of the year: Jets defensive end Sheldon Richardson, already on NFL suspension for flunking a drug test, is arrested for allegedly driving 143 mph, resisting arrest, tailgating, driving without lights and running a red light. Cops say they find a fully-loaded semiautomatic handgun in the car, which reeks of weed. Awesome.”  -- Scott Ostler


***THEY SAID IT***
"Potential sports commentator’s nightmare: A May-December relationship between Maria Sharapova and rising Canadian tennis star Denis Shapolalov."  -- RJ Currie
"The Minnesota Vikings led the NFL with 18 arrests in the past five years, with the Denver Broncos No. 2. I believe this means crime is caused by cold weather."  -- Brad Dickson
"Been a tough year for the SF Giants with injuries, but at least they didn’t spend $95 million on Pablo Sandoval. Who at .247 for the Boston Red Sox may not be hitting his weight."  -- Janice Hough

"Negeri Sembilan FA, a Malaysian soccer team, released all but six of its players, saying they faked injuries so as not to play but still collect pay.Things apparently came to a header when one claimed his paycheck gave him a paper cut."  -- Dwight Perry.
"The Tennessee football team are the Kardashians of the SEC, They look good, but they haven’t done anything."  -- Pat Dooley, Gainsville (Fla) Sun
"New Clippers forward Josh Smith, who will earn a combined $6.4 million from L.A. and Detroit next season, complained about his pay. In other news, Greece just asked him for a loan."  -- Brad Dickson
"Canada’s Shawn Barber won pole-vaulting gold at the world track and field championships. It’s easy to spot Barber: his pole has red and white stripes."  -- RJ Currie
 "Tim Tebow stopped a fight at the Philadelphia Eagles training camp. He didn’t stop it so much as he raised his arms and the fight parted."  -- Alex Kaseberg
"“Have you heard the radio commercial for a new toilet so strong you can flush a bucket of golf balls down it? How frustrated are you with your golf game when you require something like this?”  -- Brad Dickson

CP-
 
 

IT'S TIME FOR THE STRETCH RUN

CONTENDERS  VS  PRETENDERS
 Baseball now begins the drive for the playoff spots. We only have room for four spots - well, four and a half, really - so who's going to be there in October?

Print the tickets, you're in:
Kansas City, for sure.
Houston won't go away. If someone doesn't take a bat to Carlos Gomez for his antics, I'll be surprised.
Yankees/Blue Jays. A winner and a wild card - you pick 'em.
I should be typing Baltimore here, but I'm not. I just don't know who will be the last team in. There's plenty of candidates: Minnesota, Texas, the Angels. The Twins are doing it with smoke and mirrors, the Angels have an injury problem, which leaves Texas - as good a guess as any.

St Louis because they seem to be able to turn it on when they need to
The Mets will make it, the Washington Nationals will see to it. For a team that was supposed to run away with the NL East, the Nats are being beaten by everyone.
Pittsburgh. They would be in first place in every other division in baseball (Okay, a half game out in the AL Central)
The Dodgers/Giants. One will win the division, the other will be out. The Giants are winning because of karma, I guess, while the Dodgers are like a huge puzzle with a lot of extra pieces. If Mattingly can figure out who should be playing where and when, they will be dangerous.
The Cubs. There, I said it. Maddon runs the team like its a fraternity beer game. Other teams spend money on analysts and cybernetics, Maddon gives them chicken wings and pizza. He may not win, but it sure is a fun ride.

I just watched a movie called "Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde." Not the one with Spencer Tracy, but that team with the old men in pinstripes. They either beat you into submission or cower in a corner with their thumbs in their mouths. How can you score 4 runs in three games against Houston and then send 15 men across  home plate in one game against Atlanta?
I think Joe Girardi loves the spotlight. Why did he have to come out of the dugout in the 8th inning of a blowout with two men out to change pitchers, move guys around and change a position player? Just because the pitcher was leading off next inning? Let Wilson get the last out, pinch hit for the pitcher and put in a new pitcher  in the ninth. Because then he wouldn't be on TV. Girardi is the master of the useless move.

From Janice Hough: "Vin Scully has announced he will be back for his 67th season broadcasting in Los Angeles. Maybe Vin, 87, is hoping that at some point the Dodgers will treat him like a real member of the team and hand him millions of dollars for doing nothing."
As far as I'm, concerned, millions aren't enough.


***THEY SAID IT***
" Ohio State’s Cardale Jones and J.T. Barrett both said they don’t want a dual-quarterback system. I can’t wait for the Buckeyes to run out on offense for the first time and two guys line up behind center."  -- Brad Dickson
"What’s with Novak Djokovic at the Rogers Cup complaining about someone smoking weed? The guy has three Wimbledon titles — he’s great on grass."  -- RJ Currie
"Rays catcher Curt Casali had to leave Tuesday night’s 11-7 loss to the Twins after straining his left hamstring rounding first base — during his home-run trot."  -- Dwight Perry
"General Mills has partnered with a Minnesota brewing company to produce Wheaties beer. Just what I needed for my corn flakes!  No word on whether they’ll have pictures of Red Sox players on the can."  -- TC Chong
"I've played behind nine centers in the NFL. It's definitely a close relationship right away. My hands are in places not a lot of other people's go." -- Eli Manning
"With all of the money that Major League Baseballers make, what’s with so many scraggly beards and bad haircuts?”  -- Gregg Drinnan

"Raw sewage backed up into the dugouts at Cashman Field in Las Vegas, home of the Mets’ Class AAA farm team. That’s no way to run a pipeline to the majors — with the obvious exception of the one to Oakland."  -- Dwight Perry

"The Giants’ Eli Manning wants to be the NFL’s highest-paid quarterback. Most people can’t imagine him being the league’s highest-paid Manning."  -- RJ Currie

 "A Texas brewery marketing its beer in 99-packs. Or, as Rob Gronkowski likes to call it, Happy Hour."  -- Alan Ray
"Going back to August 14, the Cincinnati Reds have won exactly ONE game, and that an August 24 make-up game from a rain out against Detroit. 1-12. If they’re going to give up on the season maybe they should offer ticket holders their money back?"  -- Janice Hough
"This week's top stories: Brian Hoyer named Texans’ starting QB, Rays catcher Curt Casali pulls up lame, and two topless N.Y. women pose for tourists. Or first strings, hamstrings and G-strings."  -- RJ Currie
" Reportedly, the Bills may sign Ray Rice. Rice, Incognito, Percy Harvin, IK Enemkpali. Rex Ryan is this close to inviting El Chapo to camp."  -- Brad Dickson

Only Tony Chong could come up with this one:
"Yesterday was National Dog Day, except in Korea, where it was just Wednesday."

CP-
 

OH YEAH, THE YANKEES

That seems to be ESPN's attitude. When Toronto was playing out of their minds. the talking heads at ESPN couldn't wait to declare them champions of the AL East. The Yanks are fading, Toronto secured the best pitcher and the best hitter available before the trading deadline and the Blue Jays went on an 11-game winning streak, including a beat down of the Yankees in their own stadium.
When the baseball gods turned around, as they always do, there was no reversal from their previous stance: the Jays are still the champs, just uncrowned at the moment. Okay, they're not alone - the Orioles are coming fast, too.  The Yankees - well, they're having a cute little moment for the time being.          I like cute!

Cashman wouldn't trade his phenoms last month, and we're getting to see why now. Luis Severino is the real deal and Aaron Judge is tearing up the minors. And as for Greg Bird - his only problem as far as I can see, is his name. The Daily News has already said, "The Bird Is The Word,"  one announcer called him "Big Bird," and John Sterling's home run call is, predictably, "Bye Bye Birdie." Maybe he's not ready to replace what's-his-name..Mark Teixeira...but he's no stopgap, so enough with the Wally Pipp talk.

Around the League
## You can quit calling the AL East a weak division. If you want weak, take a look at the AL Central. They still have only one team over .500, the KC Royals.
## The NL Central is a different story. The Cubs are in third place, but their record, 17 games over .500, would put them in first place in every other division in baseball except the AL Central.
## The Detroit Tigers have been a powerhouse for several years now, thanks in no small part to their GM, Dave Dombrowski, but when things went sour this year, the Tigers made a move that probably wasn't too smart, but did give the newspapers an alliterative headline: Dave Dombrowski Dumped.
## What are the Dodgers doing? They gave up two more prospects to acquire Chase Utley from the Phillies. Utley was once a very good player, but at 36, he may have played out the string. The Dodgers will be paying him $2 million for six weeks of service, probably not the best use of their money. Since their payroll is almost $300 million, it would appear that those pockets are very, very deep.
## Joe Girardi got thrown out of last night's game for...I guess just walking out to talk to home plate umpire Dan Iassogna, not the most patient of umpires. Iassogna is not very good at balls and strikes and doesn't like to be told about it. He tossed Girardi before he even got to home plate. This is quite a crew anyway, with CB "You're Outa Here" Buckner helping to incite arguments of all kinds. Buckner will be behind home plate tonight and he's no better at calling pitches, so look for some excitement again tonight.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Have you seen the recent courtroom sketch of Tom Brady? It’s the worst quarterback draw since the Mark Sanchez butt fumble."  -- RJ Currie
"49ers wide receiver Jerome Simpson’s has now been suspended six game for violating the league’s substance abuse policy, his third suspension since 2012. It’s all part of the NFL’s “10 strikes and you’re out policy."  -- Janice Hough
"An Alabama football fan waited in line four days to be first at Crimson Tide Fan Day. Actually, in Alabama this is an acceptable excuse for missing work."  -- Brad Dickson

"The legally challenged Florida State football team had two team photos taken this year because:

a) Coach Jimbo Fisher wanted one with suspended running back Dalvin Cook in the picture and one without. b) Tallahassee Police requested front and side views."  -- Dwight Perry

"Jets QB Geno Smith will be out 6-10 weeks when his jaw was broken in a locker room fight. An unnamed source said that Geno tried to fight back but 3 of his punches fell short, and another 2 were intercepted."  -- Tony Chong

"Buffalo signed QB-puncher IK Enemkpali. First day in the Bills’ locker room, Enemkpali had his lunch money stolen by Richie Incognito."  -- Greg Cote

"A Nepalese teen set a world record by kicking himself in the head 134 times in one minute:. He broke the previous record of zero."  -- Conan O'brien

"Jason Pierre-Paul’s concussion protocol going forward, you have to assume, won’t include the question: “How many fingers?”  -- Dwight Perry

"The Brooklyn Cyclones, a minor league baseball team, are offering a provolone-stuffed sausage topped with pulled pork. This sounds like something Gov. Ricketts would come up with to carry out the death penalty."  -- Brad Dickson
" New Red Sox GM “Dave Dombrowski – “I’m not here to blow up the operation.” And Boston fans are thinking “Hasn’t the current team accomplished that already?”  -- Janice Hough
"Despite rumours to the contrary, Jets pivot Geno Smith’s disloacted jaw wasn’t caused by trying to pronounce the name of linebacker Ikemefuna Chinedum Enemkpali."  -- RJ Currie
"‘Pacman’ Jones says he’d have $100 million if it were not for suspensions. He’d have $200 million if not for strip clubs."  -- Bill Littlejohn
"Maria Sharapova and Serena Williams are the highest paid female athletes in the world. After hearing this, Ronda Rousey beat them up and took their money."  -- Conan O'Brien

CP-
 

Happy Hallucinations to the Delusional Fans of The Great & Powerful HairBag.

Television journalism? I shudder whenever I hear those two words, sandwiched together, suggesting that it’s a real thing - when clearly it is a figment of a cable executive’s overactive imagination.

Thanks to mislabeled cable‘news’ outlets (CNN, FoxNews) The Great & Powerful HairBag who has the support of less than 1/4 of a minority party’s chauvinist, war-mongering, wall-building, gun-toting base has been elevated to FRONT RUNNER status  in a presidential election that is 15 months away. 

Sports ’journalism’ ala ESPN and its multiple sub-channels, is equally sad. Every outlet has one story; Tom Brady, Tom Brady, Tom Brady. Day after day we are treated to an endless rehash of one of the greatest So What, Who Cares stories of the year. 

We know the devastating impact that repeated blows to the head have on football players. I can only surmise, given the quality of the drivel they produce, that television ‘journalists’ have secretly been bashing in their own noggins with a very large hammer behind closed doors. 

I do have compassion for team beat reporters. After watching Crash Davis (Kevin Costner) instruct Nuke LaLoosh (Tim Robbins) how to answer major league sports writers’ question, you know the answer to every question that will ever be asked in a pre- or post-game interview.

The good news for sports fans, regardless of the outcome of any game (or the philosophical wiseacring of any and every sports ‘journalist’ ) the results will have absolutely no meaningful impact on your life.

The same can’t be said of the infotainers that elevate The Great & Powerful HairBag and the other fifteen occupants of the GOP Presidential Candidate Clown Car to ‘serious’ people.

I know, Chad. Something about baseball…

Well, at least for one glorious day in New York - 

The Bird, Bird, Bird

The Bird is the word.

Ride fast, take chances - Z. Vod

2:10 AM

Another fabulous idea brought to you by the GOP Presidential Candidate Clown Car!

If John Kasich was Ruler of the Universe, teachers would no longer be allowed a clandestine space away from their students. 

That’s right, he’d ban teachers’ lounges.

Make working conditions worse to improve education. Brillant!

2:27 AM

How naive of me to think that GOP Presidential Pretender John Kaisich would so easily win the Dumb-Ass Statement of the Day award. 

Ben Carson, currently in 2nd place to Candidate Hair-Bag in the Pretender Polls has taken the immigration debate to an insane new low - suggesting drone strikes at the border. 

According to Carson, drone strikes would be far cheaper than building the Great Wall of Trump, central to the immigration 'policy' of the Great and Wonderful Hair-Bag. (The G&W Hair-Bag imports most of his xenophobic policy ideas from the Peoples Republic of China. While they are cheap and always available at Wal-Mart, their quality is suspect.)

Is this GOP race of the outrageously stupid a SNL skit gone horribly wrong????

And in better news, the Yankees sweep the Twins. 

Yup, it's mid-August and time for baseball.

Vod

WHERE HAVE ALL THE HITS GONE?

It hasn't been a very happy place in Picasner's neighborhood the last few days. I've seen hot streaks like the Blue Jay's latest run and cold streaks the Yanks are suffering through. When these streaks match up like this past weekend, everything becomes magnified. When the Yanks offense is in gear, the 3rd Army couldn't beat them, but when they cool off, the Oswego JV team will give them a hard time.
New York is in Cleveland for three games before they head into Toronto for the 2nd series between the top two AL East teams. The Jays look in good shape with three games against the Oakland A's, the American League doormat.

A few points to ponder:
-- New York has been through some slumps before, but they can break out with a vengeance.
-- Things might not be as rosy as it looks for Toronto. Bad teams have a way of spoiling things for good teams.
 -- Baseball is cyclical. I've said this before. Annie-O wears her heart on her sleeve and it's hard for her to buy into this.
-- Toronto's powerhouse lineup wasn't as dominant as the 3-game sweep would have you think. In the last three games, they scored 10 runs on 20 hits. Throw out Smoak's grand slam and you're down to 6 runs. If the Yanks had won all three games, analysts would be saying that NY shut down the Jays.
-- There's still 52 games to go (49 for the Jays), so no one should start printing World Series tickets just yet.

## Detroit manager Brad Ausmus says Johnny Cueto's delivery is illegal because he pauses in his delivery but the umps won't call it. Where is 'Balkin' Bob Davidson when you need him?

## David Schoenfield says the Yanks "old guys" won't hold up for the stretch run and the Blue Jays are unbeatable. Schoenfield is as big a front-runner as there is, so I don't put a lot of stock in his predictions.
 
## For all the talk about the weak AL East, Kansas City leads the AL Central by 12 games, a lead helped in no small part by the fact that no one else in the division has a winning record.

## After a Blue Jays homer, a fan threw the ball back onto the field, hitting left fielder Brett Gardner in the head. And you thought Philadelphia fans were tough.

***THEY SAID IT***
"The New York Knicks are finalizing a deal for Thanasis Antetokounmpo. All that’s left is to dot the I’s and cross the T’s. I mean that literally. It’ll take five days to dot the I’s and cross T’s in “Thanasis Antetokounmpo."  -- Brad Dickson
"QB Geno Smith, booed by NY fans at the Jets’ first publlc scrimmage, says he “thrives on adversity.”. If true Smith should have been the NFL MVP by now."  -- Janice Hough
"If Jason Pierre Paul doesn’t sign with the Giants, he should call Green Bay. Even with a missing finger he’d be an upgrade to the Packers’ hands team"  -- RJ Currie
"Rapper 50 cent is bankrupt. He will now change his legal name by just removing the “5”.  -- TC Chong
" And we don’t think professional athletes have problems. Josh Smith, who just signed with the Clippers for the veterans’ minimum, talking about his finances: “At the end of the day, you know, I do have a family. So it is going to be a little harder on me this year. But I’m going to push through it, you know.” Smith will make $6.9 million this year."  -- Janice Hough
"A recent analysis of water quality for the Olympic Games in Rio has dangerously high levels of viruses and bacteria. The IOC says it will be safe for the athletes because sharks or any type of marine life won’t swim or survive in it."  -- TC Chong
"We need a border fence with Canada to stop the Blue Jays from taking all of our best baseball players."  -- Sportspickle.com

IT'S WEDNESDAY AGAIN, WHICH MEANS...

...the Yankees beat up on somebody last night. In the last three weeks, the Yanks have scored 11, 21 and 13 runs respectively on Tuesday nights. Next Tuesday the Yanks will be in Cleveland and if I'm Danny Salazar, the Indians expected starter, I'd be praying for rain. Make that a monsoon; you don't want to take chances.

The Boston starter, Henry Owens, pitched well into the 6th inning but was charged with three runs and the loss. The Red Sox bullpen looked petrified out there and I think it took three security guards to force Alexi Orgando, the 4th reliever, to leave the bullpen, but he finally got there in time to give up Chris Young's 3-run blast.

Joe Girardi's late-inning panic mode is getting worse. The only relievers he trusts are Betances and Miller. Last night, he pulled Wilson in the 8th when Wilson ha a 1-2 count on the hitter. Girardi did everything but tackle Wilson to prevent him from throwing another pitch. But at least Joe had a good reason: "Strategy," he said. "Just strategy. You figure out the reasons."  Oh yeah, that's encouraging.

Dustin Ackley, the Yanks lone trade deadline pickup, is on the 15-day DL with a bad back. How do you get hurt when all you have to do is walk from the clubhouse to the dugout and back? You don't even have to walk fast.

In an interview, the Toronto Blue Jays have said they are not trying for a playoff berth, they expect to overtake the Yankees and win the division. Just so they are aware, yes, they are five and a half back, but they are seven games back in the loss column. If New York continues to win at their current pace, Toronto will have to play .685 ball to TIE New York. The Jays current pace is .519. The Jays and Yanks will meet 6 times in 10 days starting this Friday. I think Toronto will have to win 5 of the 6 in order to have a chance at the title.

Toronto and Kansas City had a little dust-up Sunday because of a couple of hit-batsman and close pitches. The umpires, of course, had no clue how to prevent it and there will be more to come. Back in the day, the pitchers took care of it themselves. There is a story that a rookie had the gall to hit a home run off of Bob Gibson and was seen enjoying it. The nest time up, Gibson knocked him down, the rookie got up and Gibson knocked him down again. After the third straight knock-down the catcher, Tim McCarver, told him, "You might as well let him hit you because he's going to keep doing this until he does."   And there were no "warnings" from the umpire.

***THEY SAID IT***
"A Cincinnati Reds fan ran around the field and then escaped over the wall without being caught. I’m glad Reds’ security isn’t in charge of capturing El Chapo."  -- Brad Dickson
"NY Mets shortstop Wilmer Flores was shown on TV crying after they told him he had been traded. The deal fell through but Tom Hanks still said he wanted to have a few words with young Wilmer."  -- TC Chong
"Talk about painful to watch at times: This year's squad puts the S&M in Seattle Mariners."  -- Dwight Perry
"The U.S. fell to Panama in the CONCACAF Gold Cup: "Losing in penalty kicks is like losing a beauty contest to a game of rock, paper, scissors."  -- Alex Kaseberg
"If Pete Rose were a Buddhist, would he be banned for more than one lifetime?"  -- Scott Ostler
"The NFL training camps are in full swing. As usual, the New England Patriots camp began with a ceremonial burning of the rule book."  -- Seth Meyers
"The biggest drawback to the Browns’ variable ticket-pricing policy is the fact that one of the two teams will still be the Browns."  -- The 'Rajah" Cleveland Plain Dealer reader
"A video purported shows Cowboys’ WR Dez Bryant fighting with his teammate Tyler Patmon. Well, training camp hasn’t even finished yet and the Dallas circus appears to be in mid-season form."  -- Janice Hough
"Saturday night a small satellite crashed to Earth – wait, that was the head of Ronda Rousey's last opponent."  -- Brad Dickson
"Toronto has acquired all-star shortstop Mark Tulowiski and former Cy Young winner David Price. It’s nice to see the Blue Jays adding big-name talent for their September collapse."  -- RJ Currie
"Rumor is Urban Meyer suspended those four Ohio State football players after he caught them in the library."  -- Phil Mushnick

CP-

A GOOD GAME...FOR YANKEE FANS

A quick 5-run deficit and then...
We've learned not to count this team out this year, but this was unbelievable. Whatever could go right, did. There were some odd things that went on, however. Adam Warren entered the game in the 7th inning with the score 19-5. He finished the game and was credited with a save. Are you kidding me? Annie-O could have probably pitched an inning and held a lead like that. Makes you wonder about the actual value of the save statistic.
Steven Drew entered the game in the bottom of the seventh and still got two at-bats. He didn't do anything with them, of course, but he did get them.
ESPN publishes a baseball power ranking every week. The Yankees, who have the 2nd best record in the AL and the 4th best in the majors, dropped from seventh to eighth this week. Whatever happened to that old east-coast bias?
One of the rarest events in baseball is the catcher's interference. One example is when the catchers impedes a batter's swing. The Ranger catcher was charged with two of these violations last night. That's one way to try and slow down the Yankee bats. Unfortunately for Texas, home plate umpire Andy Fletcher caught them both times even though he must have been exhausted after calling almost 400 pitches in the three and a half hours the game lasted. It's not true that he called for a chair for the last two innings...but I'll bet he would have accepted if one had been offered.
Texas pitching  coach Mike Maddox went to the mound so often, they'll have to re-sod the path from the dugout to the mound. Around the fifth inning, he began to carry a crying towel with him. I don't know if it was for him or the pitchers.

***THE TRADE DEADLINE***
## Some trades have been made with a couple of big names involved. A couple of trades are beyond my understanding. I don't understand why the Washington Nationals needed Jon Papelbon. The Nats already had Drew Storen, who was 29 for 31 in save attempts. Now you're playing with team chemistry. How will Storen react to being replaced and Papelbon is not exactly a guy who's easy to get along with.
## In the past three days, the LA Angels have picked up three outfielders: David DeJesus (35). David Murphy (33) and Shane Victorino (34). Serviceable players all, but are these the guys that are going to take you over the top? The Angels gave up some minor league players (emphasis on the word "minor"), but I don't see this as a big help.
## The Blue Jays acquisition of Troy Tulowitzki is intriguing. Tulo's stats at home in Colorado are much better than those on the road. How much does the thin air of mile-high Denver have to do with that. Plus, how will he do playing on Toronto's artificial turf? Tulo has a history of leg problems and Toronto's field is considered to be one of the toughest to play on. But he can be a potent bat in the middle of an already imposing lineup.
## There are some big-name players still available so it should be an interesting two days. Don't count on the Yankees, though, Brian Cashman has all but said they don't plan on anything , but analysts say he's full of hooey. The Yanks are the Yanks and they'll make an 11th-hour blockbuster.

On Sept. 12th, the Cincinnati Reds will honor Pete Rose with a bobblehead giveaway. Instead of a bat, it is rumored that Rose will be holding a betting slip.

***THEY SAID IT***
"The Mets’ Jenrry Mejia, is now suspended 162 games for his 2nd failed PED test. Once you might think you’re invulnerable. The second time? Proves again that MLB drug testing is also an IQ test."  -- Janice Hough
" A life-sized Paddington Bear threw out the first pitch before a Chicago Cubs games. Small children in the crowd should stop having nightmares sometime in 2017."  -- Brad Dickson
" Golfer Robert Allenby fired his caddie mid-round, for the fourth time: “Dear future Allenby caddies: Confine your comments to, ‘Great shot, Bob!’"  -- Greg Cote

"Seahawks running back Marshawn Lynch, conducting his annual Fam 1st Family Youth Football Camp in Oakland, stuffed a piece of chicken into his sock to eat later.In keeping with the football theme, it was a single wing."  -- Dwight Perry

"Golfer John Daly has revealed his workout secrets. I’m guessing they involve two laps around a chicken wing."  -- Brad Dickson

CP-
 

SURPRISE, SURPRISE!

At the beginning of the season, the experts would make predictions about teams, pennant races and individual players. Usually very interesting and, of course, subject for debate. It doesn't bother me when people make predictions that I don't agree with. What does bother me is that later on they treat their prognostications as though they were gospel.

At the start of the season, everyone had questions about the Yankees, mostly revolving around their health. Can some of their older players play up to the back of their baseball cards, i.e., their histories. Will A-Rod be any kind of player after basically two years off? Will Mark Teixeira be able to rebound after wrist surgery? Does Carlos Beltran have anything left? And there were all the questions about the starters recovering from various elbow, shoulder and knee surgeries?

Good questions all, but that's what they were, just questions, because no one doubted that these players were talented. Now these questions have been answered positively since the Yankees have taken command of the AL East and boast the 2nd best record in the American League. So why are all these experts surprised that the Yanks all performed so well? None of them said these  players WILL NOT be able to play well, that they WON'T stay healthy. So why are they surprised? They agreed that this was certainly a viable scenario. Granted, it is unusual that all of them have risen to the occasion, and perhaps no one, not even A-Rod, thought he would do this well. So lets just accept that New York is the most complete team in the AL East and not treat it as though it was some kind of magic trick.

On the other hand, every one thought that Boston was the cream of the crop and even though they had no reliable starting pitchers, a shortstop playing an unfamiliar position, and a team top heavy with outfielders and no proven catcher. Now that the Red Sox have shown that all their unspoken (By the experts) weaknesses are real, why don't they treat that as a surprise?

The Baseball Hall of Fame
I mentioned this briefly a couple of days ago, but let me elaborate.
Craig Biggio - A somewhat unheralded all-star with definite HOF credentials. 
John Smoltz -  Amazing that he proved his worth in two totally different areas of pitching - starting and relieving. The only other pitcher who handled that change in the Hall was Dennis Eckersley.
Randy Johnson - Total domination that calls to mind  Sandy Koufax, whose numbers didn't really justify his election (165 wins). Johnson ended up with 303 wins. But the domination in talent was evident in both.
Pedro Martinez - Domination, but through intimidation. Pedro would throw at (and hit) anyone, especially anyone who looked like they might beat him. Talented, yes, but it was the fear factor which contributed greatly to his success. Case in point: "In 2001, Martinez said of the Curse of the Bambino: “I don’t believe in curses. Wake up the damn Bambino and I’ll face him. Maybe I’ll drill him in the ass."


It's starts at the lowest levels
You may remember a few years ago when a pre-teen named Jerry Altemonte threw a perfect game and a couple of shutouts during the Little League World Series tournament. The age limit for Little League is 12 or younger. A few months after the series, Altemonte was discovered to actually be 14 at the time.  Cheating at the lowest level. In a recent interview, Altemonte blamed the whole thing on his father and his coach. Altemonte also mentioned how much he loved baseball and listed as his favorite players, Albert Pujols, Barry Bonds and Sammy Sosa. Interestingly, two of them are among the biggest "alleged" cheaters in the sport.


***THEY SAID IT***
"In the IFAF American football semifinals, the U.S. defeated France 82-0. However, the game tightened in the second half after France’s center began facing the right direction during snaps."  -- Brad Dickson
"Not that Rocky Balboa is showing his age or anything in “Creed” — the seventh installment in the “Rocky” movie series — but the eye of the Tiger now has cataracts."  -- Dwight Perry
"The LA Dodgers have apparently told Yasiel Puig that he will not be traded. Maybe because at this point no other team wants the headaches?"  -- Janice Hough

"Toronto has hired long-time Devils GM Lou Lamoreillo. Who but the Leafs would add a 73-year-old as part of their youth movement?"  -- RJ Currie
" Rob Gronkowski said that he’s read about 80 percent of his autobiography, “It’s Good To Be Gronk.” He’s the first best-selling author to ever utter, “Don’t tell me how it ends,” at his own book signing."  -- Brad Dickson
"Yes, Paul O’Neill talks too much on Yankees telecasts; he drives many viewers crazy. But that could be fixed if only someone at YES could convince him that viewers tune in primarily to watch the game."  -- Phil Mushnick
"Dan Patrick, Bill Simmons, Keith Olbermann and now Colin Cowherd. Will the last star to leave ESPN please turn out the light?"  -- Greg Cote
"Jason Pierre Paul of the New York Giants won’t sign a contract offer right now as he is learning to write with his other hand."  -- TC Chong

CP-
 

HOW'S KURKJIAN DOING?

It's only been 9 days since I posted Tim Kurkjian's predictions, so things shouldn't have changed that much. However, Tim went against the grain a lot, so let's check.

In the AL, he put his money on Baltimore, Detroit and Seattle.
The Orioles sure didn't look like potential champions against New York this week, in fact, one of the Yankee broadcasters said Baltimore looked like they were just going thru the motions.
The Tigers have lost 4 of the last seven and stand in 3rd place in the AL Central, 10 1/2 games out.
The Mariners have lost 6 of 10 and also 10 1/2 games back.
The Yankees weren't mentioned and have looked like the class of the AL East.
As a side note, the last time the Boston Red Sox won a game was on July 11, almost two weeks ago.

Kurkjian was spot on in the National league with Washington, St. Louis and the Dodgers leading their divisions and Pittsburgh and the Giants pushing for the wild card spots. The Cubs are also a candidate for the wild card.
We'll check back in a month and see if Tim still has a job.

The Silly Season - summer edition:
The trading deadline is approaching with only seven days left. One pitcher has been traded, with Scott Kazmir going to Houston from the Athletics. There doesn't seem to be any big name position players on the line but there is a wealth of pitchers. Those teams ready to trade off some players are waiting to get the best deal they can, while those teams wanting players are waiting for the price tags to come down. Let's see who will blink first.
There are those in Boston who are calling for the Sox to dump Hanley Ramirez, Pablo Sandoval and Rick Porcello - Boston's big moves this off season. Instead, the GM seems poised to move first baseman Mike Napoli. Boston appears to have written off the 2015 season. One writer says that no one should be surprised since the Red Sox have finished last three of the last four years. I never really thought about it like that.
Meanwhile, the Evil Emp...er, the Yankees have only one piece they may move and that's 2nd baseman Steven Drew, he of the .180 batting average. His fielding is absolutely outstanding, however, and with Yanks hitting like Murderers Row, they can probably afford to carry him.  Besides, Annie-O likes him. (She's the queen of the underdogs)

Congratulations to the four newest members of the BB Hall Of Fame, to be inducted on Sunday. They are, Randy Johnson, Pedro Martinez, Craig Biggio and John Smoltz.

***THEY SAID IT***
"Big news from Green Bay as Brett Favre's No. 4 Packers jersey was retired last weekend. Today the jersey changed its mind."  -- RJ Currie
"Former Cubs (and Yankee) outfielder Joe Pepitone, who was quite the partier, says fans used to throw him joints and grams of cocaine in center field, and he would hide it in the ivy. He said “with all the stuff I was getting in center field, I would have played for nothing”.  -- TC Chong
" Barry Bonds just held his annual baseball camp. It’s the only two-week camp where every kid is guaranteed of putting on 70 pounds of muscle. After completing Barry Bonds’ camp, every camper is presented with a little asterisk."  -- Brad Dickson
"The Oakland Athletics have started their trades earlier this year, sending pitcher Scott Kazmir to the Houston Astros. Thinking the A’s really need to come up with a bobblehead with an erasable face."  -- Janice Hough
"A 2-year-old racehorse in Australia, born with five legs, is doing her thing after undergoing corrective surgery, with a third-place finish to show for her first two starts. The filly’s name? Spare Parts."  -- Dwight Perry
"One of my idols, (showing my age) 79 year old Sandy Koufax threw out the ceremonial 1^st pitch to Johnny Bench to start baseball’s All Star Game. Of course, former big league manager Bobby Cox came out and argued that it was a strike and got ejected, as usual."  -- Tony Chong
"During baseball’s upcoming Hall of Fame weekend in Cooperstown, N.Y., officials warn visitors that prohibited items include weapons, coolers and Pete Rose."  -- Greg Cote
" Calvin Coolidge has joined the Racing Presidents at Washington Nationals games. This was after William Howard Taft tested positive for PEDs."  -- Brad Dickson
"The overwhelming favourite lost in the Nathan’s hotdog eating contest July 4. Is it fair to say Joey Chestnut choked?"  -- Scott Ostler
" Defections have been a big story during the Pan Am Games in Toronto. Two Cubans left the baseball team during tune-up games in the U.S., and this week four Phillies asked for asylum with the Blue Jays."  -- RJ Currie

CP-
 

SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE

While MLB takes two more days off, the sportswriters usually take this time to either reflect on the first half of the season or project the second half finish based on the performance so far. Or maybe not.

A while ago, Tim Kurkjian and Buster Olney got into a little playful name-calling (at least I think it was playful) during a Sunday night baseball game. They called each other idiots or something like that. They might not have been too far wrong. Kurkjian just posted a column predicting the finish for all the teams, Taking into account their first half performance, the shape of their rosters and maybe how much Johnny Walker Red is left in the bottle of scotch. Here's his list:
AMERICAN LEAGUE
East - Baltimore 
Central - Detroit
West - Seattle/Los Angeles Angels
Wild Card - Toronto & the AL West loser

NATIONAL LEAGUE
East - Washington
Central - St Louis
West - Los Angeles Dodgers
Wild Card - Pittsburgh & San Francisco

The National League predictions are a carbon copy of the current standings, so Tim really went out on a limb here.
In the AL, well, I guess if you keep your eyes closed, you won't be influenced by the results of those pesky games the teams went and played. He's picked the Yanks to finish last. Why? because they can't field , their pitching staff keeps getting hurt and the old men in the lineup can't possibly continue to play like they have. Okay, those things are possible, but why doesn't that apply to the other teams as well? How could he think Boston will make a big surge in the second half, especially with the pitching they (don't) have?  Maybe Buster was right.

It's midnight for these Cinderella teams: 
Kansas City
Houston
Chicago Cubs
Minnesota Twins
This seems like a fair assessment, but I think KC may fare better than the other three. I also think the Seattle pick is kind of optimistic, too.

Oh, by the way, the American League won the All-Star game last night. We tuned in to see the Al score two
runs off  Kershaw. Interestingly, Kershaw was not chosen and created the biggest outcry mostly by Dodger fans. He did eventually make the team and I'll bet the AL team is glad he did.

The trade deadline approaches and don't expect either New York team to make any kind of splash. The Mets have too many holes and the Yanks don't have any position spots open unless somebody wants to take on Beltran's weak bat and strong contract.

Interesting observation by Phil Mushnick of the NY Post. Why didn't the American Women's  soccer team wear red, white & blue?  Mushnick blames Nike, who supplied the uniforms. Why do they get to decide the colors? Don't the people who order them get to pick? And if Nike does make the decision, why didn't THEY choose the red, white & blue?

***THEY SAID IT***
"Sabres centre Ryan O’Reilly has been charged with DUI after his pickup truck ran into the wall of a Tim Hortons in Lucan, Ontario. Note to O’Reilly: That’s not what they mean by “drive thru.”  -- RJ Currie

"Scientists say that California has a slow natural helium leak. Then again, so does Mike Tyson, if you’ve ever heard him talk."  -- Dwight Perry

"Now there’s no Major League Baseball for two more days. So the whole country gets to see what it’s like to be Phillies fans" -- Janice Hough
" A Florida woman is seeking damages in excess of $15,000 after Miami Marlins mascot Bob the Shark allegedly bit her head. If this is re-enacted in court, it will be my Trial of the Century.  Because the incident occurred at a Marlins game, there are no witnesses."  -- Brad Dickson
"In case you're wondering, Red Sox third baseman Pablo Sandoval is not in the new issue of ESPN: THE BODY. If he was, he'd be the first professional athlete to fill a two-page spread without lying down."  -- RJ Currie

CP-
 

BASEBALL ON VACATION

Tomorrow is the last day of the first half of the season. Mathematically, it's a little over the halfway mark, but not according to tradition. Originally, is was meant to showcase the stars of each league in a sort of dream matchup, a game between players who did not face each other all year. How would the best pitcher on the Giants do pitching against sluggers from Cleveland or Detroit? Could American League pitchers stop Maury Wills from stealing? The fans of Kansas City would get to see the best from the National League, players that had never appeared in that town.
Now, thanks to inter-league play, the perverted value of the game, combined with the rules and the players that managers are given, the mystique is gone from the game. I guess inter-league serves a good purpose, but the All-Star game itself needs revision - badly. Since broadcasters are recognizing this and airing their thoughts, maybe the powers that be will recognize the problem and fix it. Or, as my friend Brad Dickson says,
"Major League Baseball officials are claiming they have the best all-star game in professional sports. This is sort of like being the smartest stooge."

The lingo of the game:
Have you noticed that former players in the booth use some phrases over and over? Phrases like, "He hit a home run," aren't exciting enough so they've come up with their own lingo. Some are okay, some make no sense and some are just vague enough to be irritating. Here are some with the best explanation I can give:
There are many, many euphemisms for a homer, too many to list here, from He went yard to Went downtown and everything in between.

The hammer - usually a fastball, so called because...who knows.
The deuce - It's a curve ball, given the name because of the normal sequence of signs a catcher gives. One is a fastball, two is a curve, after that, it depends on the pitchers arsenal.
Watching the catchers signals can sometimes allow you to foresee what's coming next. a For example, a fist with the thumb extended usually means throw it to first. It can be fun to see how a batter reacts to the kind of pitch  that is thrown. Try it.
Free baseball - A Michael Kay specialty. He means extra innings, and the idea that you paid for a ticket to a nine inning game and the "extra" innings are a bonus. We at home, get the bonus of extra commercials. Free baseball indeed.
Laser shot - any kind of hard line drive hit. Dizzy Dean used to call them "Blue Darters." Harder to explain but much more colorful.
Highly respected - A phrase assigned to any (make that EVERY) manager, coach scout, or baseball official. If they are that respected, why have they all been fired at one time or another, sometimes multiple times? Some announcers use the phrase almost as though it was a part of the title. I suppose it's better than saying, "Nobody cares too much for him."
Try not to do too much - Sorry but this one makes little sense to me. I like to think my favorite players are trying to do everything they can. It supposed to mean that hitters are not over-swinging, pulling their head and are generally out of control, but they apply it when a batter hits the ball to the opposite field. A player with any training is taught to try hard to do exactly that. They make it sound like a hitter stops at first when he could easily make second, I guess on the theory that you shouldn't expect too many doubles from him.
Cut action or late movement - This is when a pitch moves just a little when it gets right up to the plate. You can always tell when a pitcher has late movement on his fastball because the broadcaster tells you it does. You certainly can't see it. Even in slow motion.

They have a strange culture in the Boston clubhouse. Players texting in the bathroom, Ortiz saying he's too old to play in the field, Ramirez saying he's "not interested" in playing first base.
Texting in the can - well most of us read while we're in there, what's the difference.
Too old? Should the Red Sox cut his pay because he can only play half the game?
Interested? I'll bet he's interested in cashing that paycheck every two weeks. You'd think the GM would say, "If I'm paying, you'll play where I tell you." Maybe couple of pieces of fried chicken on the bag would help.

I mentioned last time how obnoxious Pete Rose was on the Fox Sports Panel last week. Part of it was his insistence that Stephen Strasburg left the game with a cramp when the others were speculating on something more elaborate. "Nope, cramp!" he insisted more than once. No explanation, no justification, just "CRAMP!"  Just for the record, Strasburg had an oblique strain and was placed on the 15-day DL. Pete, don't you get tired of being right all the time?

Phil Mushnick of the NY Post, did a piece on what he calls, "The code of the modern cool."  This is where players DO NOT acknowledge the applause of the crowd over some feat they just performed. They'll go through all kinds of celebratory gyrations with their teammates in the dugout or even on the field, but the fan gets nothing, not even a tip of the cap. In Yankee Stadium, they announced during the game that Brett Gardner has been named to the All-Star team. The crowd in left field cheered like crazy, but Gardner acted like he was totally deaf - until he got in the dugout. On the other hand, Michael Pineda briefly touched his cap when he left Friday's game after a wonderful pitching performance. Better watch out, Michael, you could get kicked out of the Modern Cool fraternity if you keep that up. 

***THEY SAID IT***
"The Kansas City Royals dugout flooded during a game. Royals' fans promptly voted the squeegee guy who mopped it up to the all-star team."  -- Brad Dickson
"Wimbledon saw another opening round exit for Eugenie Bouchard, who also drew a dress-code violation for her black bra. That’s rough: penalized for the one thing in her game that's been uplifting."  -- RJ Currie
"Jason Pierre-Paul on his fireworks fiasco and its aftermath. There’s no need to point fingers."  --  Marc Rogavin
"An arbitrator has reduced the Cowboys’ Greg Hardy suspension from 10 to four games. This for assaulting his girlfriend and threatening to kill her. Well, not like Hardy did anything serious like smoking marijuana."  -- Janice Hough

"Luke Ridnour, the 12-year NBA veteran from Blaine, Wash., recently got traded four times in less than a week — to his fifth, sixth, seventh and eighth teams of his pro career. On the bright side, upon retirement he’ll still have a full-time job just playing the old-timers’ games."  -- Dwight Perry

"Andong Song is the first player born in China to be selected in the NHL Draft. He was chosen in the 6^th round by the Islanders. Let’s hope that they don’t play him on the wong wing."  -- TC Chong

  (Note: only an Asian comic could publish a joke like this - CP)

"A 108-year-old Mariners fan will celebrate her birthday by throwing a ceremonial first pitch when the M's host the Angels. She credits her longevity to over 100 years of laughing — mostly at the Cubs."  -- RJ Currie

" The Baltimore Orioles agreed to sign Cuban pitcher Ariel Miranda. Will the last baseball player left in Cuba please turn out the lights?"  -- Brad Dickson

Congratulations to the USA Women's Soccer team and letting our hometown product, Abby Wambach finally get her World Cup championship.  

(Personal thanks to Vancouver's Tony Chong for his support as asked)

CP-

WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?

The Yankees are finding new ways to win ballgames. Walk-off homers, walk-off throwing errors - they even went so far as to give up a tying 2-run homer in the ninth inning just to have one of those bouncing celebrations at home plate, complete with the obligatory Gatorade dunking. It is odd to see the celebration center around a pinch-runner, though. "Way to run, big guy!" I am surprised they didn't give Girardi a bath for making the bold move of substituting a pinch-runner for his best hitter and best fielder. It was so bold, I was in the process of booking a flight to New York to punch Girardi in the nose personally. I guess his nose is safe for another day.

##  Continuing my anti-sportscasters rant:  Why did David Cone feel it necessary to spend 2 minutes (which seemed like 10 minutes) explaining the length of a pitcher's stride and the effect it had on a pitch? Plus, he repeated himself twice, complete with videos and pictures to demonstrate his point. Coney is a self-professed cybernetics geek, but really, how technical can you get?  Instead of spending millions and millions of dollars on over-the-hill players, why not spend $50 or $60 million and buy Vin Scully from the Dodgers?  Even for just the rest of the season. Dump all these ex-jocks and send Michael Kay over to radio. The only bad part of this is that my Dodger-crazy sister-in-law Pauline would probably never speak to me again.

##  The Yankees are pushing for four players to make the All-Star team: Gardner, Betances, Teixeira and A-Rod. I hope none of them make it because I don't want them to take the chance on getting hurt. I know, I know, Yankee fans that read this are currently spitting on the screen, but let's see how you feel if Tex was to re-injure his wrist. Would it be worth it just to get home field advantage in the World Series? Nope! Betances probably will make it and I guess that's deserved.
Praise continues to be heaped on A-Rod for his surprising production and he has done well with the homers and RBI's, but don't read too much into that batting average. He's gotten an inordinate amount of bloop singles and seeing-eye ground ball hits. It's fine when they drive in a run, but mostly they just artificially inflate his average.

##  Pete Rose was on the Fox Sports panel after yesterday's game and it only took two minutes before Annie-O spoke up: "Boy, Pete Rose is really obnoxious." Welcome to the club, sweetheart.

##  Miguel Cabrera went on the DL yesterday for  6 weeks at least.  .350 average, 15 homers and 54 RBIs. To say the Tigers will miss him is a vast understatement. Detroit churches are filled to overflowing with people lighting votive candles for Miggy. 

##  Angels manager Mike Sciocia and former GM Jerry Dipoto, had a difference of opinion on how the team should be run, with Dipoto feeling that Sciocia and his staff didn't give enough support to the statistical analysis that he provided, with Sciocia tempering them with his own "baseball knowledge." Teams are giving more and more credence to trends and historical data that has become available because of computers. But how far do you go? Who was the top pitcher in last year's World Series? It was Madison Baumgarner. Here's Madbum's take on preparation: "I don't do the scouting thing. I've tried it. It just worked against me. I would be out there thinking of what I can't do instead of what I can."  (I hope David Cone doesn't read this.)

***THEY SAID IT***
"The U.S. and Japanese national teams are heart-broken that FIFA President Sepp Blatter has decided to watch the final tonight from Switzerland.       The FBI is disappointed, too."  --  Jeremy Schaap
"Alabama commit Eddy Pineiro posted a video on Twitter of himself kicking a 73-yard field goal in practice. It was then run back for a touchdown by an Auburn commit."  -- Brad Dickson
"Happy Fourth of July, where we celebrate USA independence by waving flags and shooting off fireworks that mostly are made in China."  -- Janice Hough
" Cleveland quarterback Johnny Manziel said he was “a bit of a distraction” last season. That’s like Wilt Chamberlain saying he was a bit of a flirt."  -- RJ Currie

"Happy birthday to Broncos Hall of Fame QB John Elway, who turned 55 on Sunday. Many more of these, and "The Drive" will include leaving his left blinker on."  -- Dwight Perry

"Texas A & M won’t be joining rival Texas in selling beer and wine at games. Our athletic program has not reached the point where we require the numbing effects of alcohol."  -- John Sharp, Chancellor

"The U.S. and Cuba restoring diplomatic ties is expected to lead to one million Cuban people coming here. And those are just the shortstops."  -- Brad Dickson
"One of Tom Brady's Deflategate balls is up for auction with bids starting at $25,000. Doesn't that seem inflated"  -- RJ Currie
" Philadelphia Phillies’ manager, Ryne Sandberg announced he is resigning and leaving the team. And Phillies’ season ticket holders are thinking “you can do that?”  -- Janice Hough
"I’m going to be on worldwide television this weekend. You can’t miss me. Look for a crazed Oriental dude at the Women’s World Cup with a vuvazela."  -- TC Chong
" How bad is my yard looking? So bad, I think I could host a British Open.”  -- Cam Hutchinson

"Three-fourths of American high-school students flunked geography on a recent standardized test, The Boston Globe reported. Considering the NFL thinks Dallas is in the East, Indianapolis is in the South and St. Louis is in the West — well, is it any wonder?"  -- Dwight Perry

" Yankees broadcasters now mostly ignore Alex Rodriguez’s career totals as drug-aided the way they mostly ignored Robinson Cano’s disinclination to run to first — until he left for Seattle."  -- Phil Mushnick

"Cleveland Indians manager Terry Francona told reporters he once ate 17 Popsicles in a single night. This is how it always seems to go for Cleveland pro sports fans. You think you’re getting Earl Weaver, and you wind up with Joey Chestnut."  -- Brad Dickson

CP-

WHO? WHAT? WHERE? WHY? WHEN?

No, I'm not channeling Vinnie Barbarino and Mr Kotter doesn't have the answers. In fact neither do I. Maybe you all can help.

Who's at fault here?
Thursday night, Jon Lester of the Cubs was pitching against the Dodgers and he was having trouble with his location. In fact, he walked four guys in four innings, helped by a home plate umpire (Andy Fletcher) who had a narrow strike zone that night. As could be expected, Lester indicated his frustration and some words were exchanged, but Lester turned away. Not good enough for Fletcher who actually started out to the mound to continue the argument. The cubs catcher and manager quickly got between Fletcher and Lester and prevented what would have ended up as a Lester ejection. This is a clear case of an umpire instigating a big argument for no reason other than Fletcher's egotistical manner. He should be suspended for a week. 

What's with all the injuries?
It's been a bad week for players. There was an amazing number of injuries for a number of different reasons.
Giancarlo Stanton - Hit by a pitch, broken wrist
Robinson Cano - Hit by a warm-up ball thrown by the Dodgers between innings (I assume it was an accident since the Mariners are certainly no threat to Los Angeles.
Andrew McCutcheon - hit in the elbow by a pitch
Tim Lincecum - Hit in the pitching elbow by a line drive (See how things even out?)
Williams Perez - Hit in the foot by a line drive (Hitters - 2, Pitchers -1)

Where's Jeter?
It's not unusual for a recently retired player to pass on the first Old Timer's Game after his retirement from the Yankees, so it was no surprise that Derek wasn't around for this years event. But where has he been? I have read that he's been in the Dominican Republic, Europe, and India, basically everywhere but my hometown of Oswego, NY. Well enjoy yourself Derek. I hope you're at least sending postcards to Hannah Davis. Luckily for you, she currently appears to be dating a white horse.

Why do they talk so much?
We're talking about baseball announcers here. I started with the ESPN Sunday night guys, explaining everything from the reasons behind certain plays to the theory of relativity - and getting them both wrong. Now everybody is doing it. Apparently there have been a few seconds of quiet in the booth because the powers-that-be have added a third man in the booth. And they all drone on and on and on, to the point when even Annie-O is yelling, "WILL YOU ALL JUST SHUT UP?" at the TV. Paul O'Neil used to be a little shy and didn't say too much, now he's turned into the second coming of Phil Rizzuto, talking about everything BUT the game. Michael Kay is supposed to run the broadcast, but instead of controlling them, he goads them into more and more. I never thought I'd say this, but can we get Joe Morgan back? He was always so wrong it was comical but at least he didn't talk that much.

When is this going to stop?
Pete Rose has applied for reinstatement into the good graces of Major League Baseball. But new information has surfaced that claims Pete also bet on games when he was playing. He's denied this as lately as two weeks ago. No matter what comes to light, Pete and all the other cheaters of one kind or another in sports, refuse to admit any wrong-doing. They deny, deny, deny, until it's proven and then they say, "Well, maybe I did."  There's a famous line from the movie, "Three Days of the Condor,"  where the main character says to an FBI agent, "You guys think if you don't get caught in a lie, it's the same as telling the truth."

Put out an American flag and root for the Women's soccer team Tuesday night in the World Cup semi-finals.

***THEY SAID IT***
"A New York undercover investigation has resulted in finding pricing inaccuracies at all 8 Whole Foods stores in the NYC area. All errors were in favor of the retailer which is known to be well over priced as is. Yankees and Mets fans said they would never shop there again as they lined up for their $27 hot dog and beer."  -- TC Chong
"The Seattle Mariners re-assigned hitting coach Howard Johnson to the minor leagues. To ease the transition, that first night the minor league manager told Johnson the team hotel was named after him."  -- Brad Dickson
"But really? One of the “top stories” headlines on USAToday.com today is “Stanton injury a crushing blow for fantasy owners.” As opposed to a blow to the Marlins, Marlins fans, or baseball fans in general who just like to watch a great player?"  -- Janice Hough
" Tonya & Nancy: The Rock Opera” — based on the Harding-Kerrigan figure-skating knee whack in 1994 — makes its Big Apple debut at the New York Musical Theatre Festival in July. No need to say “Break a leg!” to these thespians."  --  Dwight Perry
"It’s a bad sign if you can’t distinguish between a sport and a group of people rushing to the bathroom. Doping for racewalking is like robbing a bank that you know has only $2 in it."  -- CBS's James Corden
"Ballot stuffing has resulted in 8 Kansas City starters voted onto the AL All Star team. As the winner of the event gets World Series home games advantage, wouldn’t it be wiser for KC fans to vote in the entire Phillies team instead?"  -- TC Chong
"According to a new report, Pete Rose bet on baseball while he was a player. Everyone in the world surprised by this report will be meeting Monday on top of the first base bag at the Cincinnati Reds’ stadium."  -- Brad Dickson
"A fan at Wrigley Field caught a foul ball while feeding his baby: “People were shocked — not that he was holding a baby, but because someone wearing a Cubs hat caught a ball."  -- Conan O'Brien
"At the Women’s World Cup, U.S. striker Abby Wambach is blaming artificial turf for her lack of scoring. “See?” said the Winnipeg Blue Bombers."  -- RJ Currie
" Too much of a good thing: Paul O’Neill has become a good, willing and folksy all-things raconteur. Great. Still, someone at YES should tell him the primary reason we tuned in is to watch a ball game."  -- Phil Mushnick
"A Chicago Cubs fan interfered with Dodgers’ first baseman Adrian Gonzalez and made a one-handed catch while feeding his 7-month-old son. Not surprising: Because it’s Chicago, the 7-month-old was devouring an 89-inch deep dish pizza."  -- Brad Dickson
"The Patriots Super Bowl rings are the largest ever, with each featuring 205 diamonds and 4.85 karats. The ring is so big, it won’t fit in Vladimir Putin’s pocket."  -- RJ Currie.

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