Thursday, July 31, 2014


Hope you're sitting down. The Yanks have made a very surprising move. They made a trade with the Red Sox, but it's all down hill after that. The Sox unloaded shortstop Stephen Drew on the hit-less Yanks. I haven't been able to find out what NY gave up. If it's any more a pair of used cleats, the Yanks got hosed. I thought Brendan Ryan was the worst hitter on the team. He's hitting a sparkling .200 with no homers and 6 RBIs. Ah, but now we have Drew, who is hitting .176 with 4 homers. At least they added some power. I also read the Yankees plan to use him at second base. I want some of what Cashman's smoking.

Everybody though that David Price was going to end up with the Rays, but today he went to the Tigers. Again, I can't find out what Tampa got in return.

Jon Lester went to Oakland for Cespedes. Lester's a free agent after this season, so maybe the Yanks will have a shot at him over the winter. Cespedes has another year to go.

John Lackey is now with the St. Louis Cardinals. A real house-cleaning for the Red Sox, who are mired in last place.
A word or two about the Sox. After last year's championship, everyone was surprised that Boston has done so poorly this year. In 2012, everybody was shocked that Boston ended up so badly. Has anyone considered that Boston has just been a bad team for the last three years and the Championship year was the abnormality? Boston put together a bunch of past-their-prime names, who all out-performed their expectations. Sometimes, everything just seems to go right for you.

Is there any hitter in the majors that's hotter than Brett Gardner has been the last few games?  When a fly ball with two men on bounces off the head of the center fielder for a three-base error, you know luck is on your side.

Tonight, we should be hearing about all the details of these trades.

" Bobby Cox, Tony La Russa and Joe Torre were inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame. At one point, somebody yelled: "Hey! There's a player juicing!" and all three looked the other way.  -- Brad Dickson
"Andy Milovich, the general manager of the minor-league Myrtle Beach (S.C.) Pelicans, made good on a promise to a young cancer patient whose Facebook page received 10,000 "likes" by hanging out a press-box window and singing "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" live on the stadium big board - while undergoing a prostate exam.  Hitting the high notes, we assume, wasn't a problem."  -- Dwight Perry
"A horse belonging to Queen Elizabeth II tested positive for a banned substance: "Officials say it's either steroids or whatever's helped the queen live to be 188."  -- Jimmy Fallon
"The most striking thing about about LeBron James's decision to go home to Cleveland? It's not the Heat, it's the humility."  -- RJ Currie
" The Chicago Cubs (44-61) beat the Colorado Rockies (43-63) last night in 16 innings. And if you watched the entire game and aren’t related to one of the players, you just might have too much time on your hands."  -- Janice Hough


Tuesday, July 29, 2014


The trade deadline ends at midnight on Thursday. Teams have to decide if they want to go all in and make that big trade to push them over the top or throw in the towel and get rid of some big big name players. As usual, there will be at least one trade that no one saw coming. That's when it gets interesting:
M "Wait a minute, Bob. I'm pinch hitting for you this inning."
"But Skipper, it's only the third inning."
M " I know. You should go in and change your uniform. They need you in the other dugout."

Who's moving? 
The rumor-mongers are out of control.
Jon Lester, Red Sox - Only because the Sox & Lester can't come to an agreement on an extension, not because Boston is giving up for the season. Yeah, right.
Asdrubal Cabrera, Indians - The media director is tired of correcting the way the reporters keep mis-spelling Asdrubal.
Troy Tulowitzki, Rockies - Actually, a trade with the Yankees died when Colorado refused the Yanks offer of their whole starting lineup. The Rockies said, "Hey, we want to get BETTER."
John Danks, White Sox - The Yanks are interested but only because Cashman has a few million burning a hole in his pocket.
Cole Hamels, Marlon Byrd, Jon Papelbon, Cliff Lee, Jimmy Rollins, Ryan Howard,  the trainer and the right-field ball boy, Phillies -  What, the left-field ball boy is considered a prospect? If this occurs, the Phillies roster won't be included in the score book. Instead, it will be hand-written on an eraser board under the stands  -- and updated hourly.

Naughty, naughty.
San Francisco broadcaster, Mike Krukow, believes that Rockies shortstop, Troy Tulowitzki, is being fed signs as to what pitch is coming when Colorado plays at home. He thinks this is the case because Tulo is hitting something like .571 at home and only .247 on the road. These kind of accusations are not new in baseball, but consider two things; (1) It's not illegal (2) You still have to hit it.

3 blind mice
Bobby Cox, Tony LaRusso and Joe Torre were all inducted into the Hall of Fame on Sunday. As Vod has pointed out, all three had Steroid users play for them, and none of them will admit to knowing anything. In fact, only LaRusso says the he was a "...little suspicious." Yeah, me too, Tony.

Maybe he's tired
David Ortiz is at the center of another controversy. Apparently, he hit a homer against Tampa Bay pitcher Chris Archer, and Archer didn't like it. A lot of hitters flip the bat after hitting a dinger (Reggie Jackson comes to mind), I have no problem with that. What does bother me is the 29-second jaunt around the bases afterwards, which is almost twice the norm. Ortiz holds the MLB record at 33.9 seconds. I can reheat a slice of pizza faster than that.

"Saints QB Drew Brees says he thinks he can play another 10 years, when he’d be 45. Coincidence? NFC South rivals are suddenly pushing to get Metamucil added to the banned-substances list."  -- Dwight Perry
"As a society, we must have a very low opinion of our professional athletes, judging from the media’s relentless — often cloying — campaign paying tribute to Derek Jeter for doing the right things and carrying himself with dignity. Isn’t that what everyone simply is supposed to do?"  -- Bob Molinaro
"A.J. McCarron reportedly fell in the NFL draft because he was "cocky." If being cocky hurt a quarterback's chances in the NFL, Johnny Manziel would be playing in Canada.  To accommodate Manziel, the Cleveland Browns opened training camp inside Caesars Palace in Las Vegas."  -- Brad Dickson
"Free-agent receiver Arland Bruce is suing the CFL over adverse effects from a 2012 concussion. Trying to get money from the CFL proves he needs his head examined."  -- RJ Currie
"Cowboys GM Jerry Jones says now that he almost drafted Johnny Manziel. But maybe he decided that there wasn’t room at A T & T Stadium for both their egos?"  -- Janice Hough
"Talking about David Ortiz' bat-flip: I never saw Hank Aaron flip his bat."  -- Chris Archer, Rays' pitcher
"At Big Ten media days,it was reported that the Universities of Nebraska and Wisconsin are working on a rivalry trophy. I remember when that was called a keg."  -- Brad Dickson
"Rory McIlroy said he focused on two words during the final round of the British Open. My guess: winner’s cheque?"  -- RJ Currie



All the Vod that's fit to print

Congratulations to the Three Sgt. Schultzs of Baseball, Cox, LaRussa and Torre, on their induction into the HOF; The Three Little Schultzs managed throughout the Steroid Era and "saw nothing" and "knew nothing" while their players juiced away. 

Tonight, I was looking in the Yankee lineup for someone that pitchers would fear coming to the plate. Nope. No one there.

My lovely daughter-in-law Christine, a former college soccer player at Nazareth and still a huge soccer fan asked me, “How can you argue that baseball is less boring to watch than baseball?”.

I pointed out that I have never made that argument to her or anyone else, that an inning of baseball is, at best,  punctuated equilibrium,  a great opportunity to eat roasted meat in a bun and drink a favorite beverage at worst… and that is pretty darn good.

What I have argued is that while both provide long stretches of inaction, soccer tries to fool you into thinking that something is happening when it isn’t but baseball is honest,  makes little pretense and is right upfront about it with strolls around the mound, strolls around the batters box, exciting forms of theatrical entertainment including obsessive seed-spitting, groin-pulling, ritualized equipment adjustment and the occasional bench clearing brawl.

(Of course LT and I will drive from Victor to Philadelphia to watch if and when their soon-to-be papoose chooses to play… either.)

Sunday, July 27, 2014


I have a lot of ground to cover today, so let's start.

** They have changed a rule in the BB Hall of Fame voting. Players now can only remain on the ballot for 10 years instead of 15. Sports writers who are unhappy about this say that it will adversely affect a number of players chances of being elected.  I have no problem with the rule since, being a baseball purist, I think too many players who don't belong, already get elected. To me, the Hall is for premier, one-of-a-kind players, not the Hall of  the "very good" players. But that's a subject for another posting.
** The baseball challenge rule has not eliminated arguments and ejections. Now managers are arguing over whether a play is on the 'okay-to-challenge' list, or if the challenge was issued on time. Plus, there is the farce of the manager strolling out to the umpire, stalling for time while his staff watches replays to determine if the challenge will succeed. It still needs tweaking, I guess.
** Fernando Rodney of the Mariners, fired another arrow in the air, this time after picking off a guy to end the game. He may think it's cute, but word is that opposing teams are losing patience with it.
Speaking of Rodney, did you know that there is a baseball rule that ALL uniforms must be consistent with the official team design. Remember the trouble David Wells got into when he wore an original Babe Ruth cap instead of the official Yankee cap? They should take this a step further and say that the uniforms must be worn properly. That way Rodney would have to wear his hat straight instead of sideways. It seems to get worse each year.
** Because of injuries, Brian McCann has been forced to play first base for the last few games. He's gotten away with it until yesterday, when he made a number of bad plays which probably cost the Yankees the game. Playing first base is not just about catching throws. First base is also about positioning and foot work and Brian needs a lot more training on the footwork.
** As Annie-O will attest, I disagreed completely with starting Capuano yesterday. He really wasn't stretched out and when he began to have problems in the fifth, you knew the bullpen would be finishing the game. That's 12 outs that had to come from the relievers. Everybody claims that Girardi is great at handling his bullpen, but I think he works himself into some problems and this was one of them.
** Apparently, this 17-game losing streak Toronto had at Yankee Stadium, caught the attention of a lot of people, because this was a major point in every story I saw or read about the game. Since their last win was one month short of being two years, I guess it was worth some interest, except, I suppose, to Toronto.
** It worked. After looking at an extreme shift early in the game, Chase Headley laid a perfect bunt down the third base line for "gimmie" hit. Next time up, the Jays stationed a player on the grass closer to third base, which eliminated the bunt, but would still make it easier to hit one by him to left field. If this happened more often, these extreme shifts would go away.
** This is much talk about shortening the length of baseball games again. Here's one easy suggestion that would definitely help: KEEP HITTERS IN THE BATTER'S BOX. Eliminate these constant  delays to re-tighten the batting gloves and especially these strolls around the umpire and catcher just to get back in the box. That would go a long way to quicken the pace.
** "And the beat goes on." This is a daily feature in the NY Post: "This Day In Derek Jeter History."
Have we found enough ways to get him into the papers yet?
** Why can't people spell, especially media people? These people are trained to get their clients into the public eye, but when they misspell words, KEY words, they just look silly. The Colorado Rockies put out a  T-Shirt, honoring their best player - Troy Tulowitzki. Great, except for the misspelling Troy's name (Tulowizki ). The people publishing the Texas Longhorn Media guide misspelled the name Texas over 200 times, writing Texsa. Shouldn't there be some people looking for a new career?
** Mark McGwire, who first wouldn't talk about his steroid use, then denied it and finally admitted it and begged for forgiveness, has refused to forgive  former teammate Jose Canseco and his attempts at reconciliation for outing McGwire on his steroid use. Yeah, you're still classy, Mark.

" A 105-year-old woman threw out the first pitch at a San Diego Padres game. It had slightly more velocity than the All-Star game pitch Adam Wainwright threw Derek Jeter."  -- Brad Dickson
"The first two games of the Angels/Mariners series took 16 innings and then 12 innings. Players showed up for the 3rd game with blankets, pillows and pajamas."  -- TC Chong
"Dancers at a Queens strip club will pay homage to Derek Jeter Day on Sept. 7 by wearing nothing but Yankee-pinstripe body paint at work that day. Don’t laugh. It certainly beats the sight of David Wells in a Speedo."  Dwight Perry
" Rough night for SF Giants at A T and T, losing 8-1 on a night when Yasiel Puig got three triples and a double. Maybe the Giants strategy was to have Puig run enough he might pull a hamstring."  -- Janice Hough
"Donald Sterling filed a lawsuit against his wife, the NBA and Adam Silver. Then, just for the heck of it, he included A-Rod."  -- Brad Dickson
"KFC Canada announced Wednesday that it will serve beer at its “KFC Fresh” concept store in Toronto: “Is this just a coincidence that the Red Sox are in town?"  -- TC Chong
"A Yankee Stadium suite for Derek Jeter's final home game carrying a price tag of $244,000:
"Why the discount?"
-- Bill Littlejohn


Tuesday, July 22, 2014


A man of his word, Brian Cashman has made a deal. Unfortunately, it's like trading away a worn-out left foot sneaker for it's right foot counterpart. The Yanks acquired Chase Headley from the San Diego Padres for Yangervis Solarte and a Class A pitcher. That's Class A as in location, not quality. The Padres are also sending $1 million to the Yanks and when have you ever heard of that before? Typically, NY has picked up a player who was pretty good - once.  Headley has won a glove glove at third, and after watching the Yankees fumble grounders, drop throws and fling balls all over the stadium, a gold glove addition has to be an improvement. Numbers-wise, Headley is not that much of an upgrade over Solarte, but he is also a switch hitter, so that helps Girardi maintain some flexibility.

Now let's see if Cashman can dredge up a used pitcher. David Cone might be available.

Let's face some reality here. Derek Jeter is no where near the fielder he once was. I'm not talking about his range, although he's not even getting close enough to some ground balls to even wave at them as they trickle into the outfield. He's fumbling more grounders than he ever did and his once strong, accurate arm is now neither. Unfortunately, Brendon Ryan is no answer either. He can be sporadic in the field, too, and at bat - well, the odds are 50-50 that he's can even foul off a pitch at the plate.

The Yanks face another guy tonight who is not having a good year. Nick Martinez has a batting-average-against of over .300 and an ERA of 5.10, but that didn't do any good last night.

Toronto's spurt seems to have died, Baltimore is leveling out, but it appears to be Boston's turn to run wild. Will the Yanks ever get into one of those hot streaks?

Fernando Rodney of the Mariners and the LA Angels are having some fun. Unlike Mariano Rivera, Rodney likes to show off after completing a save. He pulls an imaginary arrow out of an imaginary quiver and shoots it into the air with an imaginary bow. The other night, He shot one into the Angels dugout - in the 8th inning no less, which upset the Angels. The next night, with Trout on 2nd base, Pujols doubled him in against Rodney and then both Trout and Pujols fired imaginary arrows at Rodney. Rodney claims he didn't see it and thought it was funny. He also said he thought it was the ninth inning the night before. I can understand a player forgetting how many outs there are or what the count is, but when you can't keep track of what inning you're in...

Rory McElroy won the British Open and ex-girlfriend, Caroline Wozniacki won the Istanbul Cup this weekend. Imagine the athleticism in their children had they stayed together.

"What’s the big deal about NBA star Pao Gasol signing with Chicago? He’ll just be another Spaniard running with the Bulls."  -- RJ Currie
" Breaking: Cher just told Derek Jeter his farewell tour is dragging on too long."  -- Brad Dickson
" Not that we’ve watched “Caddyshack” a few too many times or anything, but what is Danny Noonan doing leading the British Open?"  -- Dwight Perry
"Economists say LeBron James’ return to the Cleveland Cavaliers will inject $500 million a year into the local economy. More importantly for James, it will inject $21 million a year into his economy."  -- Ian Hamilton
"New York Yankees just announced that the “official” game honoring Derek Jeter will be Sept. 7. Did no one in the front office see the All Star game?"  -- Janice Hough

"The first pitch at a baseball game in Taiwan involved a striptease. Hey, I think I found a way to restore interest in the MLB All-Star Game."  -- Brad Dickson
"John McEnroe’s son Kevin was busted trying to buy cocaine and prescription pills from a dealer. When arrested, he screamed, “You cannot be serious!”  -- RJ Currie


Friday, July 18, 2014


So now the push begins. The Yankees have 65 games left to prove that last winter's spending spree was not in vain. Because of injuries and the under-performance of their acquisitions, they will have to spend even more. Cashman keeps promising that he will be aggressive before the trading deadline, but all that is available are players that will cost something the Yanks don't have - prospects, or a bunch of past-their-prime players that won't really be of any help. 59% of the Yanks last games are at home, but they're only winning about 48% of those games. If they don't make the playoffs again, we will see a whole new team next year.

Thank you ESPN for finding a way to fit in a baseball game during your 2-hour tribute to Derek Jeter. I'm obviously a Jeter fan, but this was just a bit overblown. Did we really have to watch him shake hands and hug EVERY SINGLE person in the AL dugout? I thought they were going to have him go into the stands and high-five all 41,000 fans.

All the teams have just 13 days left to decide if they are going to be buyers or sellers. Actually, they have less than that if they want to try to put any deals together. This shouldn't be called a trade deadline; it's really a desperation deadline.

Adam Wainwright casually mentioned something about grooving a pitch to Derek Jeter during the All-Star game. He later recanted even Jeter said, "Well, you still have to hit it." It doesn't matter whether he did or he didn't. The game is supposed to be an exhibition, not critical game of any kind. When will the powers that be realize that this situation is exactly the problem with making the game decide the home team advantage for the World Series. Jeter doubling to right, Babe Ruth hitting  a home run, Ricky Henderson stealing a base: this is what the fans want to see. If they want the game to have an important result, than they should let the managers and players treat the game that way. Let the best players play most or all of the game. let pitchers go three innings if their doing well. if 10 players don't get in, so what?  Go one way or the other, and the whole event will be better.

"The sideline reporter is a very important position. Without these men and women, we'd never know that, "It's really cold on the field," and that, "The players seem to have a lot of enthusiasm today."  -- Brad Dickson
"A big weekend in sports: LeBron went back to being a Cavalier, Carmelo went back to being a
Knick, and soccer went back to being a thing you drive your kids to." 
-- Seth Meyers
"I must have missed something when I turned on the All-Star Game. Just how many weeks does Derek Jeter have left to live?"  -- Alex Kaseberg
"The world’s tallest water slide — 168½ feet high — has opened in Kansas City, Kan. Though technically it’s only the second-biggest drop of the summer, if you care to include the Boston Red Sox."  -- Dwight Perry
"A used-car dealer is suing ESPN and MLB for $10 million after he was shown asleep in the stands during a Red Sox-Yankees game. If it comes down to his credibility versus that of ESPN and MLB, I’m going with the used-car dealer."  -- Brad Dickson
" After watching the show you now have to figure Bud Selig is staying up nights trying to figure out how to make sure the World Series includes Derek Jeter."  -- Janice Hough
"Alouettes receiver Chad Johnson claims he's had 15 parking tickets in Montreal because he can't read French. Here’s a tip: a French fire hydrant looks just like an English one."  -- RJ Currie
"During a Fourth of July fireworks display, the Lancaster Jets set their outfield left wall on fire. “Johnson, how did the promotion go?” “Fine, except for mumble, mumble.” “What?” “OK, OK, we burned down half the stadium.”  -- Brad Dickson


Friday, July 11, 2014


Brian Cashman keeps saying he's ready to deal, but his phone isn't ringing. The problem is, teams still have about 20 days before the trading deadline happens and not many teams are ready to admit defeat and start selling.
One team that appears ready is the Philadelphia Phillies. They have a few people that could be on the market. Cashman wants a starting pitcher and they have two that could go but there are problems. First of all, the money won't be a problem for the Yankees. They have consistently shown that they will not be deterred by any high-priced contract, but one area is a stumbling block - injuries.
Cliff Lee might go and the Yanks have always coveted him, but he is currently on the DL and, at age 35, the risks are great. They could probably deal for him without giving up too much in the way of prospects because they could take on the contract.
Cole Hamels is another. He's only 30 but he has a $20+ million contract too. He's the best choice but New York would have to give up a lot to get him.
If Cashman really wants to get inventive, here's an idea for him. Trade for Jonathan Paplebon. Put him in the bullpen and make Adam Warren a starter. He's a proven commodity and Paplebon eliminates the need for Warren in the bullpen. He's not as overpowering as he once was, but he's still really good. He wants out of Philly so bad, he might agree to becoming a setup man and the Phillies could clear some more money off the table. He'd still cost at least one blue chipper, but there's a lot less of a gamble with this move.

What do you think, Brian?


Wednesday, July 09, 2014


## For months now, we've heard what a terrible place Coliseum in Oakland  is to house a major league team. Both the A's and the Raiders are thoroughly disgusted with the place. The A's have been begging MLB to move for a few years, only to be stymied by the San Francisco Giants, who refuse to give up their territory rights to San Jose, which the A's consider the ideal place for them.
The Coliseum field is too big for baseball, the electric system is bad, the sewer system is horrible and the place is falling down. Nobody wants to play there.
There are two rumors floating around that are at odds with each other. The A's claim to be in negotiation with the city for a new 10-year lease, while the Raiders say they have contract talks under way to have the stadium torn down and a new one erected in it's place. Who is going to win this one? Is the pen mightier than the sledge hammer?

## Is this the start of the big sell off? The Boston Red Sox have designated A.J. Pierzynski for assignment. This is a team in decline, even worse than the Yankees. The Sox can't come to a new agreement with Jon Lester, Jake Peavy may be the next player to go, Pedroia is having a lousy season and can't seem to generate any power. Shortstop Stephen Drew was a mistake, their two highly touted rookies are under-performing and they have enough player on the DL to keep a medical team on 24-hour alert. So this could be a last-place to first-place to last-place scenario in three short years. I wonder if that's every happened?

## Ex-Yankee update: In his first appearance for the Arizona Diamondbacks, Vidal Nuno went 7 innings, gave up only 3 hits and no runs.  Now why couldn't the Yanks get someone like that?

## Current Yankee update: Masahiro Tanaka seems to get worse every time out. In his last 4 starts, he's given up 30 hits and 14 runs. Not too bad but certainly not overpowering. Maybe the Yanks should shut him down until after the All-Star break.

## 7-1! Is that really a soccer game score? A couple more games like this and maybe soccer will take off as a spectator sport in the U.S.Not only is Brazil a perennial powerhouse, but they're also hosting the World Cup. I think the Brazilian team just applied for asylum in the United States, at least I think that's who those masked men seen crossing the border were.

## There could be some major deals taking place in the next three weeks. Brian Cashman, who usually runs under the radar, has been outspoken this year about being ready to "rock and roll."  Let's see if he can get the Yanks rolling or if he just picks up a few more rocks.

"Newly hired coach Derek Fisher has vowed to fix the New York Knicks. Whereupon the head of NASA said: "I'm lucky. All I have to do is get a man to Mars."  -- Brad Dickson
"Milos Raonic, as a Canadian in Wimbledon’s men’s semi-finals, ended a drought that began in 1908. “Rats! Now who do we make fun of?" said the Chicago Cubs."  -- RJ Currie
"Joey ‘Jaws’ Chestnut consumed 61 hot dogs in 10 minutes. The average American eats only 70 per year."  -- Eric Kolenich
 "Just say the words “Wimbledon gentlemen’s singles” — then remember that John McEnroe and Ilie Nastase once played in them."  -- Dwight Perry
"This summer TGI Fridays will offer “Endless Appetizers.” $10 a person – no sharing please – unlimited refills of choices including Potato Skins, , Mozzarella Sticks and Boneless Buffalo Wings. Presumably the offer also comes with a free test for Type 2 Diabetes.."  -- Janice Hough
"A Yankees fan who was seen sleeping during a Red Sox-Yankees Sunday night game has now filed a $10 million defamation suit again ESPN and its announcers, largely due to some of the comments posted online after his picture went viral. $10 million! That’s almost enough to buy season tickets for a whole year at Yankee Stadium."  -- Janice Hough


Sunday, July 06, 2014


Is all of sports going haywire, or am I simply a crotchety old man?  Annie-O says it's obvious and has nothing to do with sports, but really? Consider these scenarios.

## Melky Cabrera gets thrown out at home plate in the 8th inning of a close game. Do we get to see the replay? Sure, and at the same time, we get a dialogue box giving the recap of the final score. Where do they put the box? Right over the tag play at home. Did he miss the tag? Is Melky out? We'll never know. Do the people producing the games and the highlight reels ever watch their product? Can't be.

## Every team has at least two trainers on board full time. Most teams have "strength and conditioning" coaches. Teams give players a target for their weight when they report to camp and most players work out all winter. They take as much as six weeks in spring training to get in shape. So what? Players are dropping like flies. In the 60's, teams had a 40-man roster and you were lucky if you ever saw more than 27 or 28 of them. Now, 40-man rosters aren't enough. they have to drop people off the 40-man roster just to put enough healthy players on the field. The injuries range from broken legs to bruises. I was going to joke and say broken finger nails, but even that has happened. Maybe we need more players like John Kruk, who looked like he could have said, "Save my stool at the bar, it's my turn to hit," but he was always there.

## The Yanks lost another one yesterday in extra innings (I HATE Michael Kay's "Free baseball") when Francisco Cervelli tried to complete a double play at first base by throwing the ball to the right fielder, who happened to be in right field. I blame the pitching staff, who again failed to give the Yankees their best chance to win a game - by throwing a shutout.

## Years ago, teams would improve themselves by trading for different players or signing young players in the sandlots. Then came free agency and teams would offer players money to induce them to sign with them. Players were in a great position; they just waited for the dollars to roll in. The only problem came when a player would happily sign for X amount of money, and then start pouting two years later when another player would sign for X Plus money.  So they added Opt-out clauses, so they could declare themselves free agents and go after more money. Now the animals are really running the zoo. Not only do they want big money, they want to dictate to teams to sign other star players so they can play for championships before they'll sign with them.

## This one is really weird. Jimmy Graham of the New Orleans Saints has been given the "Franchise Player" tag by the Saints. This means he can't sign with another team, but the Saints have to pay him a certain amount based on the highest paid players at his position. He wants to be called a wide receiver, but an arbiter says he's a tight end, which means less money to Graham. So picture this conversation: "What position do you play, Jimmy?" "I don't know. The courts haven't decided yet."

## Over 5 full seasons in New York, the Yankees paid  CC Sabathia over $10,000 an inning to pitch for them. Now it appears that Sabathia's career may have ended with his latest knee problem, which means the Yanks will pay him almost $70 million to lay in a hammock for the next 21/2 years. We may be looking at something similar (but more expensive) next year, if they discover that A-Rod is done for.

## Bobby Bonilla, who last played in the majors in 2001, received his annual check from the NY Mets for $1.1 million dollars. He will be getting this same check for 20 more years. Isn't it time for him to "opt-out" and try for a larger annuity?

## News Flash! Headline on ESPN: Yankees bolster pitching staff by trading Vidal Nuno for Brandon McCarthy. Explain to me how this bolsters your staff by dumping a pitcher with a record of  3-7, 4.78 ERA and acquiring one whose record is  3-10, 5.01?  I think I'm beginning to see the cause of the Yank's problems.

"In the NBA draft, the New York Knicks’ second-round selection of Thanasis Antetokounmpo was booed relentlessly. And that was just by the Knicks’ play-by-play announcer."  -- Brad Dickson
"There are reports that a vast majority of Baby Boomers are overweight or obese. In fact, they say that half of all Baby Boomers make up two-thirds of them."  -- Tim Hunter
"Clayton Kershaw beat the Rockies 9-0 on Friday night, running the Dodger lefty’s streak of consecutive zeroes to 36 innings.Cross-marketing experts immediately declared him The Official Pitcher of the World Cup."  -- Dwight Perry
"Laker star Kobe Bryant looked a bit flabby in some offseason photos. Apparently Kobe doesn’t like to pass at the dinner table either.-- Alex Kaseberg
"Jose Canseco is touring Canada. This is obviously America's revenge on our neighbor to the north for sending us Justin Bieber."  -- Brad Dickson
"Cubs 16; Red Sox 9. Boston doesn’t need hitting, they need Tom Brady."  -- TC Chong
"Refereeing in the World Cup makes me long for the simplicity of baseball's balk rule."  -- Janice Hough


Saturday, July 05, 2014

What a great day to be an American, everybody.

July 4th! What a great day to be an American, everybody.

Ignoring the fact that over one quarter of the United States population lives in areas of ubiquitous poverty, and even more experience food insecurity during any given month, the Nathan’s Famous, Inc. once again chose to celebrate the nation’s independence by sponsoring the Nathan’s Stuff Your Gut with Assorted Ground Up Animal Parts Crammed into Pig Intestines Gorge-fest.

Broadcast over national television, the winning competitor crammed 61 Nathan’s Famous dead animal weenies into his mouth, forced them down his throat to reside, temporarily, in his distended stomach to the applause of thousands of rapt viewers, striking another freedom’s blow for consumerism, gluttony (Isn’t that one of the seven deadly sins? Can’t be.) and thoroughly disgusting conspicuous consumption.

Sadly, the wildly entertaining follow-up Nathan’s Choke & Puke-Athon featuring many of the less experienced animal byproducts eaters was not televised. I really hated missing the projectile vomiting competition where the winning megabarf was reported to be an astonishing 34’9”.

There are rumors that Nathan’s and ESPN have completed a deal to broadcast next month’s Nathan’s Enema Extravaganza – a much needed colonic cleanse for competitors still suffering the ill effects of solidified brain, eye and foot parts creating unwanted blockages in their poop chutes.

Hats off to Nathan’s for reminding us what being American is all about on our nation’s birthday. Nathan’s, a name we should remember on every trip to the grocery store. 

Thursday, July 03, 2014


" talk of many things." The Yanks aren't talking - they're making a lot of moves, and spending a lot of money. Players are coming and going and opening bank accounts.
## Dean Anna has been designated for assignment, which means he's no longer on the 40-man roster and will be either traded, sent to the minors or just released in the next 10 days.
## Zelous Wheeler has been brought up to the majors from Scranton. He's a right-handed utility infielder who's hitting .299 in triple A.
## Yangervis Solarte has been sent down to Scranton. They needed to do something with him, he looks absolutely lost both at the plate and in the field.
## Alfredo Aceves has been suspended for 50 games for his second violation of drug abuse. Just how bad are things going for the Yanks - even using Performance Enhancing Drugs don't help.
## The Yanks have signed most of the population of the Dominican Republic in the latest round of signing of international talent. They signed 4 of the top ten prospects as determined  by MLB's Top 30 List including the top two. Overall, they inked 11 of the first 18 on the list. That should about 3 years.

Not that any of this means anything. It's like cleaning the windshield when your car stops running. Cashman is out looking for pitching, when the real problem is hitting. Gardner, Jeter, Ichiro and Ellsbury are okay, but the RBI guys are simply not producing. Beltran looks slow, McCann is trying too hard and Teixeira has injury problems (He just had his knee drained) and Soriano looks like he's never seen a curve ball before. Kelly Johnson and Brian Roberts are very inconsistent. I think they should trade Johnson & Soriano and try to sign a good hitting third baseman, if there's one out there.

** I keep reading that the United States goalie, Tim Howard, has set  a record for the most saves in a World Cup game. Doesn't that also mean the US allowed the most shots on goal in one game?

** The AL shortstop having the best year will not be the starter in this year's All-Star game. Instead, it will be Derek Jeter, which is okay, because he's had the best career of all of them. He may be the only Yankee that's a member of this year's team. (Well, Tanaka, but he won't be playing) I don't mind; I haven't watched the game in years.

** I just read that A-Rod used testosterone treatments in 2007.    But it's okay: MLB said he could. Oh, really?  Is that why he had a monster 2007 season? Is that why he was running around on his wife, or was that just a side effect?

"Second seed Li Na was upset at Wimbledon. Barbora Zahlavova Strycova overwhelmed her 23 letters to 4."  -- RJ Currie
"Breaking: Victorious World Cup fans are being urged to overturn GM vehicles because there's a good chance they'll be recalled anyways."  -- Brad Dickson
"Serena Williams is gone, Maria Sharapova is gone. This potential women’s Wimbledon is shaping up to have all the ratings draw of a Tiger-less golf tournament."  -- Janice Hough
"The Yankees tried to set a world record for most people in one place wearing fake mustaches. Remember the old days, when the Yankees used to set records for home runs and wins?"  -- Brad Dickson
"Is it true Uruguay striker Luis Suarez bit an Italian named Al Dente?"  -- RJ Currie
"Michelle Wie won the U.S. Women’s Open, then got a celebratory champagne shower from some of her fellow players. Can you imagine that in men’s golf? Tiger wins U.S. Open, Phil and Rory rush onto the green and spray him with champagne? Pepper spray, maybe."  -- Scott Ostler
"NBA pundits predict that second-round pick Thanasis Antetokounmpo will have an immediate impact on the Knicks. The need for long-sleeved jerseys, for one."  -- Dwight Perry



Wednesday, July 02, 2014

July 1, 2014 –

Yankees score as many runs as the USA soccer team scores goals. Both Lose. The difference? USA soccer team overachieved led by keeper Tim Howard. Yankees underachieve led by… Beltran, McCann, Soriano and so many more.

At the seasons mid-point, what AL team has the most anemic offense? It’s not the Astros and they play in Boston.

Toronto is the only AL East team with a winning record at home.

Hobby Lobby, where sexism is a corporate value, still covers vasectomies and Viagra.